Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss May 2007 #2

well it seems I am not the only one on a downer today. I even cried myself to sleep last night. Just thinking about the baby girl I lost and wanting her to be with me but also the desperation I feel in wanting another baby now is just wearing me down. Is this normal? I am thinking maybe I need to stop focusing on TTC for a while and focus on me and my family. I just keeping thinking this shouldn't be this hard. I feel so selfish to because there are people who have been tyring for years and its only been two months. I guess I am scared that it will happen to me and I will have trouble concieving this time. To top it off still no sign of Af and I did a HPT again :doh: and suprise suprise it was a negitive (And it doesn't matter how many angles I turned it or held it under diffent lights in every room in my house (Pure desperation sad I know) a second line did not appear.
Has anyone ever checked their cervix position and is it hard to do?

Salt: I still have my:crossfingers: for you this month maybe your levels just arnt their yet? Are you using Lullaby HPT they detect from 10ml. It is amazing the hope you grab onto from one line?

Zionsmom: I think we all feel like that and I dont think there is a way to deal with it you just do! At the end of the day you have to try because you want that baby in your arms.

Bun: I am so sorry for all that you are going through at the moment. Here I am complaining and your DH is really going through a tough time. I hope that things improve for you both and I really pray this is your month for a BFP.

Good luck to everyone this month Bring on lots of BFP'S

Hi everyone,

Lee - good luck with the TWW. I do sometimes get sore BBs after O but didn't this cycle.

Megsmum - that must be so hard with two close friends being pg right now. I really hope you get a BFP soon.

Cherie 26 - Sorry you had such a bad day today. We all have them..... in all the years I've tried I've had heaps of them and I find you have a bad one or a few bad ones and then you come good again.

Sharon - good luck with Oing.

Bun - yes I've noticed the angels signifying live children. I don't get it. They don't know how lucky they are. Your DH sure has been through a lot. I hope all is OK with him now.

:)

Nothing exciting going on with me today. Just want the two week wait to hurry up and disappear.

My plans are going well Bun, i have got my dress organised and bm's well actually everything is organised im a freak lol...... Nah its been a good distraction.. But now i have it all done im dwelling on things.... Plus with my neighbour ready to pop she is due 3 days after my edd and its hard but ill get there....

I wish you all the best for your journeys and im thinking of you all.... Thank you all for your support......

Bun thanks, I will definitely keep everyone posted. I have to say I haven't noticed people using angel emoticons for live family members. I wish it could be like that for all of us.
zionsmom your fears are completely normal, I know I am going to feel the same way when I go for my 1st Ob appt and he reaches for the u/s machine, but at the moment I am just focussing on getting to that point 1st since I seem to getting pg easy enough but they just aren't sticking.
saltprincess I hope that I don't need to see my ob/gyn for any other reason than being pg too, but just don't feel very positive at the moment. I am so sorry that you got a BFN this morning, I know EXACTLY how you feel, you got your hopes up just slightly, but seeing only 1 line this morning would have been like a big kick in the guts huge :hugs:. What was your temp this morning?
Lee I have my :crossfingers: for you, hope the TWW flies by. Oh, and I usually get sore nipples/bbs a few days after O'ing.
megsmum it is hard to be patient when it is for something that you want so badly, and that you did have, briefly, only to have it taken away, it is cruel and it is something we shouldn't have to go through, I hope that you manage to get pg very soon so that you can share your experience with your friends.
cherie26 :hugs: to you hun, it is difficult coping when you want something so badly, if you feel like you need to have a break from TTC then take one. As for checking the cervix, I do it every day, at the same time, usually around 3pm and once you get the hang of it, it isn't very difficult at all, I find it easier if I squat, then I just insert 2 fingers, it shouldn't take you to long to figure out the different positions.

hi to anyone I have forgotten (sorry) and good luck to all those waiting to O or in the TWW.

I am really feeling like I am just not supposed to have any more children, if the ob/gyn tells me that to fix my problem is just a matter of taking a couple of pills then that is ok, but I know that my DH doesn't want to spend too much time (and testing) to get there, because the way he sees it, we do have 2 healthy boys, but to me that is like giving child a chocolate, letting them have a taste then taking it away and saying they can never have chocolate again iykwim

Well i'm tired so :bedtime: for me. Nighty night.

Hi everyone

I've been MIA for the last few weeks. There has been so much going on, I just don't have the time to read and/or post as much as I use to. Plus I was freaking out a little a few weeks ago about Mothers Day and my 30th birthday, and then my grandfather died (so it was all very sad).

Jane - good to hear that your wedding is all planned - nothing wrong in being organised. I have been thinking about my upcoming due date too - all those could've/would've thoughts. I was looking around a jewellery store this afternoon and was thinking I should buy something to signify my angel. I found out that the June birthstone is Pearl - so I'm thinking something along those lines. I just don't know how I feel about it all though, maybe I should just let the day pass??

Kerry - I'm sorry you are back here again. *hugs* We could still become belly buddies again. Hope your appt went well today.

Salt & Bekz - Yay we all have the same birthday! Of course I am much much younger ha ha j/k(turned 30). I don't think I've ever come across anyone with the same birthday, so 3 of us in here together is very unreal.

Looks like there have been a few BFP's as well. Congratulations to you girls - wishing you happy & healthy pregnancies.

Anyway I have to get some sleep - I'm so tired and I have a full workload tomorrow. I will have to try and get on here every few days to catch up on everything.

Just popped in to send some :bluedust: for this month...

Computers down at home :wall: so using the library when I can....

Morning all!

Janeo - great to hear from you! Hope the wedding plans are going well. I'm sorry you have such a sad date coming up, hope you are surrounded by lots of people who love you to get you through.

Satya - Good luck with your new gyno...hope he turns out to be the one to bring your dreams true! Hope you caught that egg this week too :)

Sharon - Great to hear from you! Hope you are doing ok?? Glad that your GP could recommend someone that should be able to help you. Let us know how it goes when you have your appointment. :hug:

Zionsmum - I totally understand how you feel. I wasn't going to do this cycle for feeling the same way, then the fighting instincts just kicked in and as soon as AF turned up, I knew I had to keep going. If you need to take some time, then do it, maybe it's what you need to refresh and keep going again?

Bun - I had noticed that too with the angels! Glad I'm not the only one who thought something of it!

Salt - I'm so sorry hun :hugs: It's just not fair and so heartbreaking and so incredibly cruel. It's supposed to be one of the most natural things a woman can do, and for a lot of us, it's the hardest :(

Lee - Good luck on your TWW, hope it flies by, probably good timing with the holidays!

Megsmum - Hugs for you too! That would be hard having 2 of your confidants pregnant. I also hate that my friends don't feel like they can tell me they are pregnant, it's still nice to feel involved even if things are hard yourself, isn't it? What have you got planned for the 3rd birthday?? My DS is 3 in June, we are having a little morning tea with his besties and a cake!

Cherie - Hugs to you too! It's seems to have been a hard week for a lot of us :(

Hi to everyone else!

My scan this morning was a little more promising, I'm just a slow responder! Had a 12.7mm follie growing and the lining looks a little healthier, so I've been sent home with OPK's to start on Saturday and another scan on Monday. He said if things keep going like this, we should be right to go ahead, so fingers crossed my body keeps behaving!

I went to the movies last night with 2 girlfriends to see 'Because I said so'...was a funny, girlie movie and would recommend it! Was good for a laugh (and perve factor was pretty good too!!). Went out for desert and a wine afterwards, was a good night!!

Aww I'm sorry salt . I have been stalking your chart hoping your temp would go up again.

Hi to everyone else.. I'm at CD10 and really hoping this month will be our month for another BFP. A close friend just found out she's pregnant and due early Feb so would be wonderful to have a close EDD to her (if I get a BFP this month I may even have a leap year baby...).

Hugs to you Salt.

xo

Salt- I understand your disappointment :hugs:. I am praying that it will happen for you soon.

Satya- It just seems to be more bad days then good at the moment but I do have alot to be grateful for so I need to start focusing on those things a little more!

Sharon- Thanks for the info on the cervix! I am just so into finding out all the aspects of TTC so maybe it will make things easier and there is so much I didn't know before because the two times I fell pregnant we didn't even have to try it happened first go.
I am sorry you are having difficulties yourself at the moment. I hope that your ob will give you good news and that it will b e just a couple of pills (If it is give me some!).

Las- I am so excited for you! Great news about the scan so hopefully this will be your month for a BFP!

Well for the first time since the loss of our little girl my husband talked to me about it and actually cried (Not a crier at anytime). He has been a little hesitant in TTC and just kept saying he might not be ready for the responsibility (made no sense to me either). So I finally realised why and asked him if it was because he was scared that I would miscarry again and finally a break through YES! Did anyone elses partners of husbands feel like this? How do I reassure him so he will want to TTC?
Oh well better fold some washing and check my little boy is sleeping!

Hi girls,

Salt - so sorry to hear AF is on her way. Boo hiss to her! I know how you feel, but at least you have a good plan and a great OB to see in a couple of months if you haven't fallen. I like a plan - I find it usually makes you feel better! I don't know if this helps, but apparently there is only a 20% chance of falling each month, so sometimes it can take time, but you WILL get there! DH and I would like 3 or 4 kids, but I am thinking there is not much chance of that now, as we will run out of time. If it takes this much time, effort and losses to just get one, I think I will get too old to have 4 now! It would be nice to manage 3, but I suppose we just have to wait and see. :hug: to you. And you are not being whingey - I have those same thoughts too. Everywhere I look there are pg women, and I think why did they get to keep their babies when both of mine died? It should be the easiest thing in the world, yet for some of us it just doesn't work out that way. It really is so unfair.

Diane - what you are feeling is totally normal. I am terrified no matter what too! I am scared of not getting pg, of getting pg, I am utterly terrified of scans and the first appointment if I am pg, I am scared of BTs in case they tell me the levels are too low, I am scared of everything! I don't really have any advice - I think it is only natural to feel this way. I have found counselling good - to try and drive away those negative thoughts and replace them with happy things, and I try to look at all the good things in my life and focus on them. The trouble is that doesn't always work! At least you can always come here and know that we understand what you are going through. :hug:

Lee - I get really sore nips around O time, so that may be a good sign for you!

cherie - my DH was the same. They seem to find it so hard to talk about things, and then finally open up. My DH is scared of us m/cing again, and of the effect it has on me, but has made the decision to keep trying, knowing that if I m/c yet again I will probably lose the plot completely. I am glad that he has finally opened up to you - it makes it much easier to understand where you are both coming from. Sometimes they just take so long to get there!

las - glad to hear your scan went better this time. Yay!

megsmum - that's tough about your friend being pg. A friend did a similar thing to me recently - lied to me about it hoping that I would get pg, because then it would be easier to tell me! It really doesn't help, does it?

Sharon - I am pretty sure you will find that it is just a matter of a few tablets and nothing more than that, as you fall easily enough. When is your appointment?

missbelinda - good to hear from you. Sorry to hear about your grandfather. Where are you at atm?

OMG, I have just seen 9 preggo women today (possibly a tenth, but she was a little large so not sure if it was a baby bump or not). Are they stalking me or something??

SP I am so sorry that AF is on her way :hug: to you hun.
missbelinda77 nice to see you pop in, I hope work doesn't keep you too busy though.
*las* the ob/gyn I see is the same one that delivered my GP's 2 boys so he can't be too bad. I have my fingers crossed that your body keeps behaving and you get your bfp this cycle.
cherie26 I didn't have a clue about any of these O signs/symptoms but it doesn't take long to pick it up and work it out.
Bun my appointment is on June 15th, so only 2 weeks away. How are you going? not long till testing ;) as for all the preggo women, everytime I go out I see hundreds of them (well maybe not quite that many LOL)

my temp went down this morning, and had some more ewcm today, dh played golf this afternoon and was definitely not up for a BD session, so I think I will just have to pin him down tomorrow night LOL

Hi ladies

Sharon- good luck with the BDing.
las - Best of luck with your follie.
Salt - sorry your AF is on it's way. Try and keep positive.
Kiwigirl - CD10 for you already. That came around really quickly.
Cherie - It's good that you and your partner had that conversation. Best to get things out in the open. My DF did not feel like that - he just wanted to get straight back into TTC mode again but our situation is very different - I have a history of infertility so the odds of conception aren't great and I am 41 so I have a 40% chance of m/c even if I do conceive - therefore we have to just keep trying.
Bun - 3 or 4 kids - gee your keen. Just the one will do for me, but then again we do have one part time so make that 1.5. Due to my age I'm scared I'll end up with twins.... don't get me wrong it would be great but I don't know how I'd afford child care for two kids.... we already pay it for miss 4 but she would be in school by then so maybe we could..... or perhaps I'd just have to give up work. You are not the only one being stalked by preggo women - it's happening to me to. You know it's a really good sign - I saw heaps of them the month I conceived - lets hope its our lucky month this month.

Sorry to anyone I've missed.
:)
Well it's CD18 for me now & 4DPO. Feeling really positive this cycle. Let me tell you why. My skin has not broken out after Oing - I always break out and the only cycle where this didn't happen was when I was pg. My coverline moved on FF from CD12 to CD14 which is exactly what I thought as I experienced some pretty severe O pain that day. I have cold symptoms, trying not to read anything into this though as half the office has had a bug that's going around. This happened last pg too. I am experiencing large amounts of creamy/clumpy cm... never had this before. It started yesterday and has increased this morning. I had a weird pain yesterday for hours on end but it was more in the hip than the abdo and had mood swings. Had extreme fatigue last night - went to bed at 7.30 to watch tv & missed everything that I meant to watch. Not going in to work today as just don't feel up to it.

satya - and everyone - is it possible (and reliable??) to have pregnancy symptoms before getting a BFP? Like when I got PG in Jan, I looked on the net to see how early you could tell and they were all talking about noticing changes by about 6 weeks so I didn't over-analyse if I was feeling different or not.. but maybe you can??

On an unrelated note... a client in the US called me right in the middle of the night (grr, Americans don't seem to get timezone differences even when it's explained to them!!!).. I use my cellphone as my 5am alarm to take my temp and the alarm plays the same song as the ringtone so I got all confused and thought it was my alarm going off... took my temp in the middle of the night then realised what time it was!!!! Hahaha.

Hi Kiwigirl.

The experts say you can't get symptoms until implantation occurs, but the net is full of women who had symptoms from as early as CD3 but most women don't seem to get any symptoms until about 9 or 10DPO. They say implantation usually occurs between 7 & 10DPO but can happen a few days either side. That would then account for women who get symptoms as 3 or 4DPO - they just had early implantation. What you also have to remember is that it is not an exact science.... we can guess which day we O'd by temping but even that is not 100% accurate so it could have happened a day or so earlier than what we (or FF) work out.

My only early symptoms with my last pg were cold symptoms & and noticably clearer skin in the 3rd week of my cycle (I break out twice per month mid cycle & end of cycle.... I know it's really funny for a 41 year old). Week 4 I started to get heartburn every day and was burping a lot. Frequent urination and sore BBs only happened a day or two before my AF was due. All of these things I only noticed in retrospect as to be honest I didn't think I would fall pregnant due to my history.

Pretty much every "pg symptom" could be attributed to a number of other ailments so it really doesn't mean anything until you get that line on the test. That said, it doesn't stop me wondering if this could be my lucky month.

Thanks! I wasn't doubting your symptoms just wondering how early you can tell. In hindsight I was unusually tired on a couple of days before I even got the BFP but I wasn't trying to look for changes... I expect I will be trying to look for any sort of change this cycle though!! I break out mid and end of cycle too, thought I would have "outgrown" that by this time but it purely seems to be a hormonal thing.

Hi girls.

Well I am 7DPO today, so too early to have any symptoms, but I have just noticed that my left bb is a little tender! Probably nothing though. Satya - I also have heaps of creamy, clumpy cm that I don't think is usual for me except when I have been pg. I have also had a dull cramp in my left side today and yesterday, but not really bad or anything. It's funny, the two times I have been pg, I have gotten a cold too. I don't this time, though, so maybe that's a bad sign. I hope it is good luck that we are seeing so many pg ladies!!

kiwigirl - yay! CD10 already!

Salt - how are you going?

Sharon - yay on your appointment coming up! That's not too long a wait, and I reckon you will find it is easily fixed, and you certainly have no trouble falling pg, so that is a great start!

I spoke to an OB the other day (DH's cousin - always good to talk to if I have Qs). She told me that 12% of Australian babies are now born by IVF! I was surprised at how high that is. And she reckons the m/c rate is more like 50% than the accepted 15-20%. She said half her patients have no idea when AF is due and often don't even realise they have had a m/c. She also reiterated how common m/c is and how good our chances are that it will work out eventually. She said she is very hopeful for me, and that medically, there is nothing to worry about, and that is probably why my FS hasn't done much, as nothing needs to be done. She reckons I would be the perfect obstetrics patient and that we have just been unlucky. I always feel so much better after I talk to her. She also said that, if the worse happens and we just keep m/cing (and this is really unlikely), then IVF with PGD is a really good way to go and will definitely get us pg with a healthy bub. I don't know if it helps anyone else reading this, but I thought it was all very positive and helpful.

Thanks Miss Belinda, I think that sounds like a lovely idea, I have a nov angel pin that i have on my bag for bubs, but i think something like that is lovely i will have to see what July's birthstone is... But like you said see how you go.... We also planted a rose at the front door for bubs....

Afternoon All,

It's cold and wintery here in Hobart, the fire is buring and I feel ready for bed (it's only just gone 5pm!!)

Bun - good to read what your Ob friend said, I take some encouragement from that too.

Satya - Is it me, you - or what - but I definately sense a good positive vibe around you and all of us. I believe we will all be pregnant in the next couple of cycles!!!!!!!!!! I have to believe that, something just feels good.

Salt - how are you?? Did AF come yet?? Hugs, thinking of you - but that good vibe is still there around us all.....!

Well, I'm feeling a bit sick, kinda flu-like. Only a few days dpo, so CAN't read anything into that. I think I'm just weary after the big emotional highs of last weekend's wedding and having my girlfriends surprise me etc.

BUT

I can't help but definately feel a "cooking" feeling in the uterine area, and have had some pains yesterday and today, just a bit tender down there - but could well be post-ovulatory stuff. I'm not going to test until AF is a few days late, if she is. It's a great feeling when AF is late, and you haven't tested.

Wishing you all a wonderful weekend.

Lee xoxo

Thank you to everyone who responded to me, I was just having one of my many moments of fear.

Bun- I was laughing when I read your post about pregnant women! Just the other night I went out with dh and I had been at the pool all day before that and I counted 8 pregnant women at the pool and 6 while we were eating dinner on the patio (at a restaurant) I told him I would scream if I saw ONE more. I usually do ok but seeing that many was just ridiculous for me it was making me sad and happy all at once. Sad because of everything but happy to think of being that one day soon. :) anyways your post was great.

Kiwigirl- I can't believe how fast time has flown you will definately be in my thoughts this upcoming month. I am sorry you got a random call like that in the middle of the night but at least your good at taking your temps! :) btw I live in the U.S. and I am aware of time zones ;) I wish others were! I hope your doing well and look forward to updates.

Salt- For what its worth I am sorry about your AF I hope next cycle it stays away!!!!

LEE- Good luck my fingers are crossed for POSITIVE news!!!!

Just a quickie for now - Janeo, July's birthstone is the Ruby (my birthday is July!).

Hi girls!

Nothing exciting happening here. AF arrived this afternoon - a few days early too. But I much prefer AF early rather than late IYKWIM

I have a free double pass to this weekends Pregnancy/Baby/Childrens Expo at Homebush, but don't really see any point in going (not sure if it would upset me or not). Plus, I am working tomorrow and figure I will just take it easy on Sunday. Is anyone else planning on going?

ETA: Gee I wish I was as slim as my avatar!

Hi Everyone. I started typing out a long post with personals, but, by the time I'd gotten through all the posts, it was terribly out of date & ppl had moved on. So, that's my long winded apology for lack of personals, except these...

Bun - wow, you guys are in a difficult situation, but I am glad you are feeling positive. And it helps to have positive ppl around, thanks for passing on your OB's comments. Helped me too.

Rachael - Thanks for asking the how soon can you see pg symptoms question. I was gonna ask that too.

Satya - Thanks for the answer. Glad you're feeling positive too. I think your symptoms sound promising. About the profiles & being stalked, I didn't think I knew anyone else pg, but now I'm not so sure. My user name give me away to friends, but I might change my profile so that I'm anonymous to aquaintances. Impressive number of posts per day by the way!

Salt - I'm sorry to read about your BFN. I thought this was your month too (sorry if that doesn't help). You certainly deserve it. I hope it works out next month for you. In the meanwhile, go nuts on gooey cheese, sashimi, fancy ham (always forget what its called) and champers. You deserve that too.

Alex - How's the house hunting going?

My l weekend in Belgium was great. Indulged in chocolate, waffles, mussels & frites, but just got to watch as my friends downed yummy beers. I was playing it extra safe cos I don't want to blame myself again if I do fall pg & m/c again.

I am at 11DPO but was a bit down earlier this week cos I've had no pg symptoms at all :(. Except for breaking out in huge zits in strange places right after O, and the last time that happened to me, I was pg.

But today I almost missed my stop on the way to work cos I was asleep on the train, and almost missed it on the way back too. And I'm probably imagining it, but I think I am peeing more often. Could just be because I've been tired & found it hard to find time to leave my desk.

I'm trying not to get my hopes up, but after being down in the dumps, I really want to hope for the best. Also, DH has been working every day & every night for the last six weeks, even Sat & sun, even from Brussels. Even though I can talk to him, it is hard to find time and he is so stressed and has other problems.

I had a really stressful day at work today too. Something went majorly wrong with the system (I work in IT), which we worked hard to fix, then afterwards got yelled at on the phone for it going wrong in the first place. Had to just meekly take it, customer is always right.

*arrrgh* sorry for ranting & raving about my life.

Hope you're all well. Stay positive everyone. This is going to happen for us all. I'm sure of it.

Miss Belinda - Is that a plane on your avatar? Are you a flight attendant, or just like travelling?

I'd give the baby show a miss BTW. Sounds like a nightmare.

Having said that I did stop at a posh-useless-kids-things-in-only-beige-white-and-patchwork shop window and look longingly at a wooden rocking horse and a patchwork bath mat type thing that you put baby on.

Do you like to dream & plan & be ready for when you're pg? Or do you not like reminders of how things could be? I'm firmly in both categories, even though that makes no sense.

satya things are sounding good for you, have my :crossfingers: for you
Bun when I was pg in november, the slight pain started off only being in my right bb (on the side of too) so it could be a good sign, I really hope so :pray:
Lee things are sounding pretty good for you too, I hope that a bunch of us (preferably all) move on the PAML thread really soon
missbelinda77 I am like you, would much prefer AF to arrive early, keeps us from getting our hopes up too much. I won't be going the expo, don't see much point until I am pg, and I think it would make me a little depressed seeing tiny babies and pg women everywhere.
pash it really sounds like a stressful week for both you and DH, glad you had a great L weekend in Belgium. Your symptoms are sounding good, but like you said, it's best not to read anything into them just so that you save yourself 'major' disappointment. Every month before I get AF (usually a few days before) I always get a few small pimples right between my boobs, and the only times this hasn't happened has been when I have been pg, so when I see them appear, I know AF is on her way, but it could be the complete opposite for you :0)

Well, DH didn't want to BD last night, he said he has been thinking about the last 2 m/c I have had and thinks that it could be because I am overweight :0( he wants to wait until I have seen my Ob/gyn before we try again, and also for me to lose some weight. He also wants me to think about whether having a baby is really what I want (which it is) so I am feeling a little bit down today since I looks like O was yesterday and the last time we BD was 3 days before then.

pash - it's a shark in my avatar. It's the symbol for the footy team I support. My DH and I are sports crazy :) I know what you mean by not wanting to get your hopes up, but sometimes that is a good thing, because we just never know what is around the corner, so we may as well be positive about it.

I think I will definitely miss the baby show. I'm a bit like you and like to dream and plan, but also don't like the reminders. The odd thing is, before I was pregnant I would always be looking in baby shops and planning everything, and then as soon as I was pregnant I didn't want to buy anything too soon - "just in case" - which was just as well in the end.

Sharon - Hmm, I just realised that we are both married to Paul's. Strange men! Did you point out to him that there are many overweight woman falling pregnant and having babies all the time and that's no reason to stop BDing! I've never understood why people think being overweight can cause infertility - isn't it rather that being overweight can be a symptom of something else, which is really the cause of the infertility??? Or maybe it's me that doesn't understand???? Anyway lots of *hugs* and I hope your day improves.

Thanks Lisa... I went down the street last night to get a birthstone pin for a christening pressie and saw the July one was Ruby...

Hello all!
From everyones posts it seems like there might be quite a few BFP's this month!

Sharon- I think I would kick my husband if he said that! Men! it is true what they say "you cant live with em but you cant live without em" Just keep focusing on you ob appointment which must be close now and hopefully that will bring the answers you need.

Salt: I hope you are doing ok? Another cycle is here so fingers crossed this is your one!

Bun: 8 dpo! So close to testing Good luck! I wish I had an Ob on hand like that! She sounds like she really know her stuff which helps put your mind at ease about things. It makes sense that the mc rate is higher than they say.

Satya: Sounds like you are in for a BFP this month too! Do you have alot of visits to an Ob or fs because of your high rate for possible miscarriage? I have my :crossfingers: for you!

Has anyone here experieced ovulation pain or spotting? I had two days of mild cramping and slight spotting. After my visit to the ob and them saying I hadn't ov yet, 3 days later I had the cramps and spotting and just wondering if it was me ovulating? I did some google searches and what I found sounds like what happened to me. I hope so I a made sure that we bd just in case!!!

I hope everyone is having a restful and fun weekend!

missbelinda77 I know someone else who is married to a Paul, and he's a strange one too LOL. I understand what you are saying and I also know that Paul is just worried that if I am overweight now, when I get pg and go full term, will I be even more over weight then, and then what if I end up with other medical conditions after, so I can see his point to an extent, just made me a bit cranky, but I honestly should lose at least 10kg so I am going to try and eat healthy and start getting some regular exercise.
cherie26 I really felt like punching his light out, but after thinking about it a bit more I can see his point, but I am not going to stop ttc when my next cycle arrives (unless told to by my ob) but I am going to start working on losing a little bit of weight, just by modifying what I eat and getting some more exercise, and maybe going to bed earlier as that seems to be when I am naughty and eat all the wrong things :p I had Ovulation pains a couple of days ago, and on the first day of the pain I also got some spotting when I checked my CM which I don't normally get, but a lot of women do feel O pain, and I have read that you can get spotting as well, so hopefully you have timed everything right and you will get your bfp this cycle.
Salt how are you going? big :hugs: to you

Hi everyone

Sorry for my absence but I probably won't post again until AF arrives, whenever that will be. It's been about 11 days so I've probably got another good fortnight or so before then.

Good luck to you all - I hope this thread is cleaned out a bit by the time I come back.

BTW, seeing friend's baby went okay, I am just a bit glum and way better than I was.

:heartbeat:
shoegal

Miss Belinda - hmm.. now that I look at your avatar again, it does look like a shark :redface: In my family/culture the tradition is to buy nothing for a baby until it is born. I now understand why, but it is hard. When I was pg, I had asked my mum to buy a few little cotton dresses for my niece, but I decided to keep one of them for my baby, then I m/ced. Even though its irrational, I wonder if I brought it on because I was selfish and kept a little dress (that's still in my mum's drawers somewhere). Maybe if I get her to burn the dress or give it away, I'll get a BFP?

Sharon - I've never heard of overweight mums having a higher rate of m/c. But I have heard (on TV and from a GP) that overweight ladies have trouble falling pg. But if you get AF (which can stop if ur overweight), and especially if you ovulate, then your weight is fine. If you were able to fall pg in the first place, then also your weight is fine. Its so frustrating that men seem to play one small part in the whole pg process, but it is so hard to get them to perform it. Not sure if punching his lights out is going to motivate him though! Maybe try talking to him?

Shoegal - :hugs: You're doing really well, especially coping with all the social things that are expected of you, like seeing friends with babies. Take the time you need and I hope AF comes when you want her.

Going through this stuff really separates your fair weather friends from your real friends, doesn't it? Unexpectedly, my best friend, whose been there thu so many ups & downs, abandoned me on this one. To be fair, she was trying to cope with going back to work (to a new job) after finding childcare for her 4 month old, and recovering from post natal depression. But it took her 3 weeks to even call me (she lives in the US, so we haven't seen each other). I've spoken to her a bit since, but I've sort of held a grudge, which I think I should do something to resolve. I feel petty for holding a grudge cos we really have been through loads together, and its not like the last year has been a walk in the park for her either.

But I'm a bit annoyed with DH's best friend, who was really thrilled when we told him we were pg, but then when we said I had m/ced, he sent a txt and never mentioned it again. Except to ask DH why I wasn't drinking last week (as in trying to probe & get DH to admit that I'm pg, which I wish I was). Makes me feel like he's a fair weather friend. Again irrational, cos he and DH have been friends since they were 5, and have been through loads together.

But all the emotional support came from totally unexpected people. I feel so lucky to have BB and the lovely people who stood by DH & I when we were struggling.

Whew, don't know where that came from. Was supposed to be a flippant and short post!

Well last night i got home and took a HPT (Lullaby conseptions off the net) and got a very faint second line in the time. Got excited because i have already tested with this brand and when you get a BFN there is no sign of a second line not even an evap! so this morning i did another one and again got a very faint (not as faint as last nights) second line! It is the 10ml one so it is very early which means I did ovulate when I was cramping and had the light spotting and we BD then just in case. I am going to test again in two days to make sure and that the line it getting darker! Keep your fingers crossed for me!

My fingers are crossed for you Cherie.

To everyone :bluedust:

Fingers crossed for you Cherie!

All the best cherie, that's so exciting!! How many DPO are you?

Hi everyone,

Cherie - contrats on the BFPs. Things are looking very good for you this month. What CD are you at now? I also get O pains but not spotting at O. I'm thinking that maybe what you are describing could have been implantation. In answer to your question because my m/c's have both been really early I hadn't been to an OB yet so I've just been seeing my GP. I have now been referred on & am seeing a gyno in a week and a half. He apparently has an interest in infertility so I guess I will see how that all goes.
Bun Very interesting stats the OB gave you there. I'm glad they made you feel more positive.
Pash - your symptoms are sounding very positive.
Sharon & Belinda - Extra weight can have an effect on fertility but for some reason it is only in some women. I also have extra weight on. Some doctors suggest that you lose weight before trying IVF because the weight could be the problem and you could be wasting your time. One thing I know is that bigger ladies are far more likely to end up with diabetes whilst pg. I know several women who've had this and they were all overweight. New research has found that too much trans fats in your diet can effect your fertility. I've been cutting them out of my diet for several months now but it's in heaps of store bought food and pretty much all takeaway food. If you want info on this google trans fat & fertility. You will be amazed at what you find.
Kiwigirl - who really knows how early you can tell. It's all in hindsight afterall. When I was pg I had no clue I was until I went overdue and the two months after I m/c I had myself convinced I was only not to be. I don't think the early signs really mean anything until after you are late if that makes any sense.

:) Well I'm CD20 now 6DPO. My CM has now changed to lotiony. Felt really tired all day yesterday but that could be my cold. Had a headache yesterday.... probably also my cold. I have been extremely thirsty but that could also be the cold. I am dreaming really weird stuff and haven't been able to remember any dreams for months but these are really vivid so I'm remembering everything. One of the dreams was my SIL telling me that she thought she was pg. Another was going to the doctor to be checked out for having too much CM (I know a little odd) and when I came out the front of the surgery a gun man held me up & I told him not to shoot me as I was pg. Oddly I've been sensitive to smells even though I have a cold and am as stuffed up as. I had to search the house high and low for a flowery smell yesterday but couldn't find what it was until I opened my washing machine & it was my laundry liquid. I've also had to shut the garage door a couple of times as it opens on to our kitchen and my DF was smoking in there & I couldn't stand the smell of smoke.... I've never smelt smoke come in to the house from there before..... a bit weird. Trying not to get my hopes up as I know it's probably all in my head like it has been the last two cycles.

:

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I spoke to an OB the other day (DH's cousin - always good to talk to if I have Qs). She told me that 12% of Australian babies are now born by IVF! I was surprised at how high that is. And she reckons the m/c rate is more like 50% than the accepted 15-20%. She said half her patients have no idea when AF is due and often don't even realise they have had a m/c. She also reiterated how common m/c is and how good our chances are that it will work out eventually. She said she is very hopeful for me, and that medically, there is nothing to worry about, and that is probably why my FS hasn't done much, as nothing needs to be done. She reckons I would be the perfect obstetrics patient and that we have just been unlucky. I always feel so much better after I talk to her. She also said that, if the worse happens and we just keep m/cing (and this is really unlikely), then IVF with PGD is a really good way to go and will definitely get us pg with a healthy bub. I don't know if it helps anyone else reading this, but I thought it was all very positive and helpful.

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This does give me some hope. I am trying not to feel down... but I am CD34 and no AF. On CD29 I had some light spotting and cramps and I thought, oh good here she comes... but NO nothing.... except lots of creamy greenish/yellow CM. I do have a cold and feel sick... but I did a test today and it was BFN (no surprise there).... but I thought that would bring AF out of hiding, but NO!

I know its only 4 days late so far... but I am worried she is not going to turn up for ages and I am going to be stuck with long cycles... :( Did anyone else find their cycles were longer after MC?

Hope you are all doing well... and Cherie26 - I hope those lines get stronger and you get your BFP!

Cherie ooooh! That sounds very promising! :crossfingers: that the lines get darker.

Satya Also very good signs :crossfingers: that this is your month.

Positive How confusing. I hope it isn't just a late AF. Dunno if this helps or not, my first cycle after d/c was 31 days, exactly what it was before.

Went out last night & DH's best friend was hinting that I was pg again. DH pulled him aside to tell him that I wasn't and that if he wanted to know, he should just talk to us about it and ask if we were or not. Hinting & joking that we are pg just makes us feel bad, cos we're not. The guy got really uncomfortable & left, cos he's never actually talked to either of us about the m/c or ttc since my m/c. Maybe I expected more from him cos he's a nurse & one of life's sensitive men.

Hi lovely ladies,

Just saying hello :)

Had a much quieter weekend, recovering from last weekend!! It's nice to be married.

I'm only 5DPO, and OVER IT!!!!!!!! I really have to curb my impatience. I have to put it out of my mind!!!!!!!!!! AAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! I have sore BBs, and have been feeling "hot, flushed" - but of course would never read anything into that LOL!!

OK, now thats out.

Yes, I can wait, I can, I can, I can :redface:

Sounds like there's some BFP coming in the next 2 weeks. I pray for us all.

Hope you all had a great weekend,

Hugs,

Lee xo