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hiya ladies, just wanted to pop in and say hi. have been skimming the messages every few days. thanks for the birthday wishes last week it went well, i didn't tell anyone that it was my birthday here as I didn't want the fuss, those that are important though made a big enough fuss; spring happy belated birthday for monday (sorry if i got the wrong day my days are so confused at the moment). my trip is going well, not much news actually, anyway will be back on board next monday but just wanted to say i hope all the little ones are growing nicely and mel, all that pain sounds promising, and count me in to buy one or two of the s&k's (if you can part with them!). to everyone else hi and i hope you are well.
looking forward to catching up on all the posts and gossip next week, take care
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howdy everyone! i've been on a bit of a downside and couldn't manage to jump in the conversation. today i'm no better, but i'm forcing myself to do something.
lynn- yippee on *Hope*'s heartbeat! what a breath of joy.
mel-your posts are too funny. i think you have a line on letting some of the ttc stress out. crimped hair, what a blast. i tried to recapture some of my 80's joy this weekend by dying a stripe of my hair bright blue. i thought it would finally be a good answer to "how are you" -- "kinda blue". made dh laugh, anyway. ikwym, i wasted lots of braincells memorizing lyrics to songs that would be better left unknown.
spring- i hope you get loads of help for your move. also, happy birthday a day late. nothing seems right anymore, but here's hope for the future.
nat- i'm sorry your sister was so insensitive to your pain. sometimes i think it is fear that makes folks say hurtful things. if they can distance themselves from the situation, then they don't have to fear that it could happen to them. hugs for you.
tommysmum- good luck on the house extension and on the sweet babe being in it.
bailey- i wish there were a scan that would make you feel better, less fear. Faith feels your love, that's all i know for sure.
deb- hugs to you, and sending you all the positive thoughts i can. each moment of your time with *Col* is precious, no matter if you are positive or strong or not. he or she feels your love -- that's why *Col* waived at you "hi mom!"
i had a bit of a downward spiral beginning with finding out a good friend is pregnant for five months and told everyone but me months ago. i felt so hurt and alone and like the grim reaper no one wants to let into the party. i know they all held back to try to protect me from my own pain, but they also kept me from the joy of sharing her joy. and they added the loneliness and the fear that i will lose all my friends because i have become this depressed sad person who reminds everyone of death. the next day would have been Yeti's third month birthday, and sunday was so hard for dh and i couldn't help him at all. what a spiral. i'm trying to force myself out of it today, being at work and pretending to care. sorry for the downer. m
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Hello girls,
Sorry just a quick one.....midweek rush, havnt been able to get to the computer of a night due to DH working at home so I will get in soon but needed to check on you all and say HI:hello:.
Deb - wonderful wonderful wondeful news on Col. See even a wave! Monday will be fine on day at a time.
AND Spring you tricky thing, a very big belated :happybirthday::happybirthday:. I will see you on sunday.
Looking forward to the catch up oh Lynn did you find a time yet?
will talk soon keep safe
Luv Natxxx
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Hey all,
Mel - :cryinglaugh: Vanilla Ice, stop making me feel my age! LOL!
Deb - Great to hear 'Col' is going so well! Even waving to his mummy!
Bailey - all those movies, sounds like the way to spend the day, even with Vanilla Ice :cryinglaugh: (sorry Vanilla Ice just makes me laugh)
Klee - Glad to hear the trip is going well!
AuntieM - What a cruel thing to do, not telling you about your friend being pregnant, I think that would upset me more than her being pregnant! IYKWIM?
Lynn - Hello, how are you feeling?
Well DH went to the doctor today, which was a waste of time IMO, when he told the dr about the problems he was having the dr said it "MIGHT" be retrograde ejeculation (where the semen goes backwards instead of coming out of the penis! TMI, sorry)
or it "MIGHT" be no problem at all that was it, there was no offer of further testing to see how bad the problem may have become, if there is a problem at all.
It is possible that it could be "RE" because DH is a diabetic and the condition is caused by nerve damage......(which is irreversible :() so we still don't know what we are dealing with.
Sorry for the rant, I'm just frustrated!
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Jo - how frustrating! Can you go elsewhere and get another opinion? I hope it isn't anything too bad.
Auntie M - I'm sorry that your friend didn't tell you about her pg. Like you said, perhaps she was trying to protect you. I know what you mean about losing friends. I feel like some of my friends have put me in the too hard basket. Some of them are close friends that I thought would stick by me through thick and thin but I guess something like this shows you who your real friends are. Happy 3rd month Birthday to Yeti. I know how hard these dates are and my thoughts are with you and your DH. And remember, don't ever apologise for venting, that is what we are here for :hug:
Mel - we can always rely on you to make us smile :hug: Vanilla Ice - too funny! I know all the words to his song too - how sad! I got a S&K box too. I bought the car magnet but DH won't let me put it on there (ruins the car or something :rolleyes: ) so it is on the fridge!
Bailey - I can understand your fear of the doppler. I am scared of u/s. Perhaps instead of having a doppler reading ask for an u/s this way you will be able to see the heartbeat. I don't know if they can pick up a heartbeat on a doppler this early anyway. I could be wrong, Deb would know ;) When I had my scan (dildo cam!) on Tuesday I wouldn't look at the screen. My FS eventually said it is ok, everything is ok. So I looked and saw my cute little blob with a hearbeat. I burst into tears immediately because I remember seeing Cooper on the screen and it just brought back so many memories. Sounds like your m/s is easing. Mine is just starting. Last night was terrible! But good!!
Klee - great to hear from you. Not long now and you will be home. How did you go last Sunday with Phoebe's 5 month birthday. I was thinking of you and little Phoebe :hug:
Nat - well it is all systems go for the catch up on sunday. I will email all you chicks to let you know the details. Can't wait!
Deb - how are you feeling today? I hope that migrane has gone. I too am stressing about my scan on Monday. Hopefully we will both have great news Monday afternoon.
Well Monday is going to be a big day for me. I have my scan at the hospital on Monday afternon. I am so scared about walking back into that hospital, but I must overcome that fear............one step at a time and I can do it. To keep my mind of things, I am having lunch with Phill Kearns on Monday. For those of you that don't know who he is, he used to play Rugby Union for Australia. My dad won the lunch with him through an auction at the Stillbirth Foundation Ball. My older sister loves him so my dad bid for her. She is coming down from Brisbane this weekend so the three of us will do lunch with Phill - how exciting!
Well I am off to clean the house and do the washing - what fun!
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Aunty M - I am so sorry you have been having a rough time (but glad I could put a smile on your dial :) ). I am also sorry your friend didnt tell you about her being pregnant, while I am sure she had the best intentions those things do make you feel like a "lepor". As Lynn said, I often feel like I have been put in the too hard basket, and I think its because people are scared of us - scared of our emotions, our pain and more importantly scared of confronting their own emotions. And finally, you are not a depressed sad person - you are a woman grieving the loss of your son, grief has many ups and downs and different stages and it is completely normal for you to feel everyone of them :hugs:
Klee - Glad to hear you are doing ok. Looking forward to coming home? You can definitely buy some S&K stuff. When are you back? We will have to catch up for a coffee and you can tell me all about your break (when you are over the jet lag and settled in of course).
Jo - LOL I was feeling my age when I thought about it too, that was a whole lifetime ago - hence the reason I feel like such a sad case for remembering the words :redface: That seems pretty poor about DH's visit to the dr, it sounds like they should be doing some tests and making sure they know exactly what the problem is before dismissing it all and sending him on his way, I agree with Lynn get a 2nd opinion. Even if it means you have to travel to the closest major town near you. I dont know what his symptoms are but if doesnt sound like something you just wanna let go. I hope you (and more importantly your DH) can get some answers.
Lynn - Thank you for making me NOT be the only sad case here by also knowing those lyrics (if you can call them that) ;) I will be keeping everything crossed for some great results on Monday :hug: Your lunch date sounds fantastic, and your sis is coming from Brissy for it as well which is just an added bonus. Did you get really excited when you got your S&K box? I did and wondered if I needed to get a life :dunno:
Bailey - How is your movie day with DS going? Hope Faith is being good to Mumma.
Spring - How you feeling? You have been quiet, hope all is ok. I will give you a call later.
Hi to everyone else, hope you are all good.
I have taken a sickie today - just couldnt be bothered going to work, I woke up and felt like I hadnt slept even though I had had 7hrs of sleep. Ended up waking up at 11.30! But I feel really crappy now, bad headache and just in general yuk.
So looks like I am hanging around here for the day!
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Must be the weather Mel, I woke up with the flu & feel like yuk too! Oh & I sent you an email about the wristband too.
Lynn - cool about the lunch with Phill Kearns, not a rugby fan myself but I do know who he is!
Just to be a bit clearer about DH's symtoms, (TMI perhaps) when he ejaculates sometimes there is very little semem, or even none at all & it has been getting worse over the last 2 years, It would certainly explain why it took us 14 months to conceive Storm :dunno:
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Hey Jo - I got your email, and I replied :)
Surely there is something they can do to help your DH? I mean I know I am not a dr or anything I would think it can be too good for the semen to be going back up the tract instead of out. I guess it would explain why it did take you so long to conceive Storm. Even if it is irreversible though, I wouldnt think that means you cant conceive, I wonder if there is any medical procedure they could to extract the sperm and implant through IUI? I hope that doesnt sound dumb but as I said I no dr. I still think it would be worth getting a second opinion, or if that is too difficult go back to that same clinic and demand they run some tests to find out exactly what is going on. Its all good and well to assume, but following the assumption to the leg work to find out if its right. I do worry about some drs sometimes :rolleyes:
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Mel - Cool!
The thing that upset DH the most was that the doctor (&this is our family gp) told him to come back if I wasn't pregnant in 6 mths time cos we hadn't been trying for 12 months yet! As DH said, it could be to late for him then.
The stupidist thing of all was that when we lost Storm this same gp told us that because of DH's diabeties & that it took us 14mths last time to come back in 6MONTHS! Why does he think DH went to see him yesterday!!!!!!Methinks he is so busy that he forgets what he told us!:doh:
But I think we are going to try & see If we can get him to do some tests or something as hubby has to go back in 3 weeks for his diabeties bloods he had done! (by the way since seeing the gp yesterday his sugar levels are all over the place - stress I think!)
Wow, I seem to be talking alot today :rolleyes: or is that whinging :cryinglaugh:
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Nah I talk alot all the time - its a free country :p
Your GP may be "too busy" but he still has a duty of care to his patients. I can imagine your DH is stressed, not only are you guys grieving for Storm and at the same time trying to be good parents to your earth kiddies, now you have this to worry about. I really hope you can get some tests done, it may be nothing but you wanna KNOW that not just think it.
Good luck with it all :crossfingers:
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Lynn - Just saw your post on Phil Kearns. I believe too his daughter was run over with the family car a couple of years back and amazingly she survived and made a remarkable recovery. I remember seeing her surgeon on TV who actually operated on my DD when she was born - he is an amazing man (PK too !). How exciting !
Mel - hope you are feeling better. Is it cold in Melbourne at the moment? Dont blame you for staying home and why not - just take it easy - you obviously need it.
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hi all - just popped in to say hi and let you know that I'm reading your posts everyday and following all the news!
Mel I think I'm ready to get the name of your ob if you don't mind -
I've scanned all my old emails and can't find it. AF arrived on Monday the first proper one since we lost our little Alfie - and the sadness and disappointment arrived back with her!
I keep hearing that Dixie Chicks song with the words "and I'm mad as hell" in the chorus (I have been known to shout it out in the car) - Hope you don't mind me asking again but since the crying myself to sleep has started again I think it's time that I refocused and got some proper advice.
thanks heaps - george
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Well how annoying, just wrote my reply to Tommysmum and then lost it :angry:... but thats ok cause now I can reply to Georgie as well LOL
Tommysmum - Its freeeeeeezing here :( Although you might be best to ask someone else (Georgie do you think its as cold as I do?) cause I am ALWAYS cold. About a month ago I said to DH that I wanted us to go away for the weekend to the snow when the heavy snow comes and he just said "you?" and laughed! Anyway we are not going now cause we are saving our money for something else ;)
Georgie - Hey nice to hear from you again :) I am sorry AF arrived, believe me I know the emotions she brings with her. But, now that she has regulated herself I :pray: that its the start of a successful TTC journey for you. I should still have your email addy in my history so I will send you Mark's details now :) Make sure you pop in and let us know how your going, or even email if and when you see him - he is sooooooo lovely, a genuinely nice and caring person.
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Actually Georgie I have just gone through my email and I dont think it is there anymore. Email me and I will reply with his details :)
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Hi all
Mel - my email address is gstans@bigpond.com. Thanks so much for this...the truth is I just don't know what to do next! All the results have come back with no answers (I know this is common) and my ob said I've already had all the tests he'd recommend - so I thought I may just run this past someone else.
DH says after all these years TTC is a rollercoaster he wants to get off - I understand it from his point of view - ie having to run the business/look after our earth babies/deal with his own grief and THEN deal with my grief has taken its toll - but I just can't bring myself to not try again. If TTC was something I could forget about I would ... but despite the heartache I actually feel like I want it more than ever before.
You're right about the cold it's FREEZING I've been wearing a hat and scarf all day - even in office! I just can't seem to get warm... much love to you...I've got my fingers crossed for you in the next few days. Do you have any good feelings??? Hope so - love george
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Hey Georgie - oh der :rolleyes: I did have that email in my history LOL but was looking for one that started with GKS (folks are dumb where I come from)! Will email you now...
Dont have much of a good feeling at all cause DH and I didnt really try this month, not stressing about it though. I gave in a couple of days ago and did a test with a negative and just thought oh well, and I dont think I will do another one. Who knows, I might change my mind in the morning. But then AF is due Saturday so I will know then one way or the other right? The only thing I do :pray: for is that AF will not come a day or 2 late as it has done in the past, I think that will give me false hope which I really dont need or want iykwim.
Re your TTC I will put it all in my email :)
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Never say never Mel - i had one negative test with Alfie a couple of days before AF was due! Hope and the belief in a happy ending will keep us going - it just HAS to!!!
Having said that I went to pieces on Monday when AF arrived - perhaps I should listen to my own advice - it's just so easy to say and much harder to do - as we all unfortunately know only too well.
AF better keep her distance ! love George
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Hey girls
Sorry if I have been a little less vocal then usual. I am fine, all is ok it is just that I am working crazy hours in the lead up to the end of the financial year. Today DH and I got up a 4.30am so I am shattered by the time I get home.
I promise to do some personals during the weekend.
Hope you are all well.
Lv Spring
PS. Lynn, thanks for your text, I promise, nothing is wrong (well apart from the usualy stuff) but thanks for looking out for me.
