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Hugs hun I understand how you feel. I know its not all about money, but I had friends who I spent a fortune on when they had bubs who hardley even asked how I was etc when DS1 was born consequently not friends now.
You do what feels ok for you, if you don't want to do meals etc dont.
Its very rude to always talk about ones self and never ask how others are doing especially when people have had issues themselves.
that's the thing feeb the money for IVF they inherited from his Father passing just before they started it ... i get the feeling they think having gone through IVF twice and having to go through all that physically is harder than us NOT having a child at all.
Infact my DP bought it to my attention the amount of needles & blood tests & medication let alone surgery i have been through in 3years adds up to probably more the two rounds of IVF if i was gonna look at it that way. Oh god i sound dreadful in saying it but it's true.
and thank you so much Feeb for making me not feel guilty if i don't feel i can help at times as at the end of the day they haven't ever helped us so i shouldn't worry too much about that but at the same time i just want her to know i am here if she feels she does need to ask for help. I've even offered to babysit her DD heaps recently before babies are here so her & her DH can spend some time together for now.
Sadly i have never felt comfortable around her but her DH is just the most wonderful bloke and being in a town even if it is big it's hard to escape people here as i did more than a year ago try to end the friendship (if you can call it that) by not contacting her but she was persistant and she kept leaving me messages i could see she got upset at the thought of something ending between us so therefore i couldn't end it.
Wow - cooking and babysitting sounds like HEAPS of help to me, especially as you have your own family to take care of. Seriously please don't think any more thoughts of that not being enough.
Unfortunately some people are just more self centred than others and this person sounds very engrossed in her own experiences with little thought for your feelings etc - from all your posts you seem to be a very kind, thoughtful and caring person. It sounds really sensible to not over invest in a relationship that is so one sided (apologies if this sounds harsh but I felt quite upset for you after reading your update).
... oh thank you Mak your beautiful words gave me some tears but happy ones :heartbeat:
and your comment is so very true, i'm never one to invest in a friendship that is one sided ... i keep contact with her more so cause her & my DD are sweet little best friends and that being in a town it is a very hard situation to avoid someone so it's actually easier to just know them but what i do now is i don't keep the contact as frequent but it's still there and both her & my lives have gotten busier which has worked out for me !! (heartfelt thanks again Mak, i feel better now hearing i'm doing 'enough ' :D) xOx