Gift Etiquette?

Sometimes it's just the way the cookie crumbles ;) Although at the time it can be pretty annoying regardless of how petty the amount is ($5 etc). The mothers group I initially went to with ds had a $50 gift (secret santa style) for their 1st birthdays which I thought was way too much!!! So I talked them down to $30. The gift I purchased was on sale and I paid a $35 and was really happy with what I had purchased the little girl but my ds didn't even see a gift! The mum who was buying for him sent me a message telling me she had a gift and I replied with some catch up times and she never got back to me. That mum is really lovely but seriously slack! At the time I took it pretty personally (as you could imagine) but at the end of the day I don't give two hoots. I left the mothers group not long after as they just weren't my cup of tea and I found another bunch of mums to hang out with who actually care about each other :D I still see some of those other mums every now and again and one of them I see almost weekly for a play date but the rest can go on with their expensive gifts and meaningless catch ups. On another occasion I felt ripped off at a family Christmas on dh's side, it was a $50 buy for someone type of thing where we knew who we were buying for. We ended up with stupid gifts that we gave to other family members on the day to spread the love around a bit more, but we ended up with nothing and had spent $100 on others. Personally I'd rather no gift giving.

My work KK is up to $20, if I find something cheaper that I think is suitable then yay me! We don't have money to just waste but I try to join in as best I can to not feel like the Lepur who couldn't afford to participate. Maybe she is in the same situation and has done her best to spread her budget to join in.

You checked the price?
That's pretty rude. I hope you waited until you got home to do so.

Money can be very tight for some families at Christmas time, especially in situations where people have large extended families who all swap gifts. Although you can afford to go over that may not be the case for other members of your group, who might have found the extra $15 a burden on an already tight budget.

Surely the joy of gifts is in giving not in counting the cost.

TBH my DD1 came home from school with a note saying they were doing Kris Kringle at school and every child had pulled a name to buy a $5 gift for.

Frankly, I'm not happy. $5 will only get a cheap crappy toy that the receiver doesn't need anyway. We are told we can opt out, but after this has already been drawn, so how's that going to work? DD1 has heaps of friends that she will want to give gifts to and I'm not happy to have yet another to buy for.

Do we all really need to buy cheap toys for our kids who already get a boatload anyway? I'd rather they all did an activity together at low or no cost, a special outing, a letter to a child overseas, a craft activity, or something like that. And then you have these issues of 'my present isn't as good as yours.'

Goes completely against the spirit of giving. I'm tempted to buy one of those goats or whatever for a village through World Vision on principle.

Ugh. That's just annoying. I'd probably just buy some stationary/glittery pens.

Or a nice Christmas tree ornament?

Jen, my DD is sticker crazy at the minute, I could buy her three big packs of them for $5 and she would have a cow! LOL
I tend to not give other people's kids toys anyway, so my first thoughts don't go to buy toys as such - I buy stationery, books, costume or dress ups.

I like the idea of a Christmas tree ornament, that's nice.

Stickers is a good idea - if everyone bought stickers I bet the school would think twice next year *evil giggle*

Jennifer I'm the mum in my (new) mothers group that suggested a $5 gift, I got in first before someone else suggested a ridiculous amount like $50 in my old MG! I think when it's $5 it's a gesture not a case of make sure you spend every dollar of that $5. It could be a home made gift if a family can't spare the extra $5 and no one would care or get petty about money not being spent in a store. I think $5 is a great idea personally and there are loads of things that can be given as a gift to a child for that amount. I will be giving a book or craft things. I'd be more annoyed if the $ amount was larger. We don't even by each other gifts at Christmas so if I'm going to spend money I'd rather buy my ds something he will love rather than wing it on a gift for someone else.

We have done $5 gifts for school for ages. Often we get a beautiful ornament for their tree. A second hand book. A trinket from a market. I actually think $5 is good because you think outside the square. DD got a beautiful hand made journal last year at the market for $5. No you probably won't get anything except lollies or junk toys from any major store. But hand made gifts are awesome too.