Dunno whether it's worth working

My kids are having a hard time adjusting to me working. I was a SAHM for over 11 years, they've always come home to me after school, I was always there for them on weekends when DH worked and on school holidays. I was in tears this afternoon talking to my mum as she was telling me DD was having a bad day. She misses the time we had together before I worked which breaks my heart.

I enjoy working! I am also loving the money! For the first time in 11 years we have extra money in our bank account every week. We're not scraping around the day before pay day to buy milk or bread anymore. This may not be a big thing to some people but for the first time in 11 years I am able to buy DS shoes without borrowing money from my mum. I don't want to go back to that!



Now I'm starting to wonder if the money is really worth the pain I'm putting my kids through.

Just wanted to offer you hugs.

My Mum was a sahm until i too was around 11 years old. At first I played up and was not happy that my Mum was working. But then my Mum explained to me why she was working , and for the first time i was able to play a sport because we could afford it.
At first it was hard but we soon got used to it and my Mum made the effort to spend the time we did have together.

I on the other hand am just becoming a sahm for the first time. So after working for the first 10 yrs of my daughters life i now only work a few hours n the weekend.

I understand 100% how you are feeling. You are doing what you feel is best and in the end its what you feel most comfortable with. Perhaps sit down with your kids and just explain that Mummy is working so we can do this etc and don't beat yourself up. Us Mums beat ourselves up over everything...

is it possible to work when the kids are at school or over night? that way they wont really notice the difference?

i believe if you need to work then you have to work. the extra money is always worth working.. (ie working is better then collecting cl payments IMO)

You poor thing, it's so hard to decide b/w something that benefits everyone but comes with some compromises or doing the same old thing.

I applaud your decision to go back to work (sadly i know i will have to sooner than i hoped) and get that little bit extra so you can give the kids a little more of what they want rather than just what they need.

I hope things settle and they get into a new routine and start to realise your doing it for them!

GL with it all and i hope you find the right decision in your heart aswell as your mind!

Don't feel guilty for trying to do your best for them and most of all for yourself!

i can understand why DD is having trouble with it. She wants mummy to be there for her after school as she's used to it.

I think you need to explain to her the situation, that its best for the family and for you that you work.

More money = more freedom to spend money on things which may have been considered as luxurious in the past.

working mummy = happy mummy = happy family. For your sanity, not that you didn't enjoy being home for the kids, but they are all now older and don't need you as much as they did previously. Tell DD that you enjoy working.

I'm sure they'll understand, it's probably just new for them and need time adjusting to the routine.