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They may be able to remove it, but he may not want that. It seems that incomplete resection followed by radiation will only statistically improves survival by a couple of years but the damage caused by the treatments risk making those extra years worse than what he already has. If they had acted years ago when it was small he would have had a better chance of complete resection and less chance of recurrence but that is unlikely now.
Oh arte that's just awful :(
oh arte! that is just horrifying. how can a specialist just forget about about a golf ball size lump on a brain?! i mean, that is to me still a blooming big thing to have in your head. wowsers.
how is BIL with the news?
I'm still reeling at that news, Arte - I can only imagine how he and the rest of the family are feeling - it's just one story too many of things that seem really obvious in hindsight being missed at the time when they needed to be paid attention to. We have such powerful machines and medicine and yet disease can still outwit them all. :( :hug: I really hope that now that this has been acknowledged, there is something that can still be done to improve the quality of his day to day living.
Weekend looming - looking like we'll get some sunshine (yay)! And don't tell anyone :shhh: but I *might* be about to head out for a spot of covert kitty-kat hunting just in case there's a little kitty at the animal shelter who needs a new home. :shhh:
oohhh! i would love to do some covert kitty hunting...goodluck MD!!!
Cover blown!!! Kitteh NoName now in residence! :D
WAHOO!!!! :dance: :leap:
I am counting this as a new addition to the September 07 family :lol:
Good work on finding a new feline friend!!
Yay for the new kittt MD. Z would love a kitten but I'm not ready for pets beside the fish lol
MD, congrats on the new kitten :) I love the name! I suspected that you would get one - I have never heard of anyone that goes out looking that comes home empty handed lol
I think BIL is doing alright with the diagnoses - he seemed alright the couple of times I have seen him. I think that despite the prognosis, there is a relief that there is actually a medical issue making him the way he is itms. However, diagnoses or not he still is who he is. They had a meeting in Auckland today that has been planned for a couple of months, tickets etc paid for and he has done the boost over night. He will rock up some time, but too late to catch the flight. Very frustrating. I don't see him taking any treatment for it because he can't even face a half hour meeting. I guess there isn't much hope of any improvement from the last few years, and presumably it will only get worse. At least knowing about the tumour will give IL's a reason for his behaviour which may make it easier to deal with.
The kids and I made a surprise party for MIL over the weekend and I just remembered how much work they are lol. I think that I might be able to deflect parties this year - the girls can take a morning tea to play centre and W is happy enough with a fun day with his friend when we visit north in the holidays.
Oz, well, all I can say is stick with the fish - a kitten really is a commitment. Oh the kitty-proofing that has been going on in this house this week LOL. She's still living in the study, but tomorrow she's having House Orientation 101, and we'll see how she goes with supervised doggy visits as well.
Arte, that's sweet doing a surprise party! Must be nice having the ILs close now. I'm all for a pared-down birthday, but we never did have a party for miss E last year. So I think she's expecting all the trimmings this year LOL.
All good here. I'm not sure if I actually had a busy week or whether it just seemed like it was full on account of all the kitty-patting that went on. LOL.
Kitteh update - she's eaten the modem powercord. Ho hum....
All good here. Had a class mass today and was very proud of Miss E who bravely stood up and read the scripture reading. Can't believe this is the same kid who had massive stagefright and refused to perform in the kindy play.
Got asked tonight which of my babies came out of my tummy and which ones came out of my vagina. LOL.
Yay for Miss E and her new stage confidence :) It is lovely to see them develop like that :) Sorry your kitten ate the power cord lol.
My E had a very serious conversation with me the other day asking if I had a baby in my tummy. I said I didn't and she looked unconvinced, then said "but what about here?" and pointed to my boobs lol.
Things are just ticking along here. Nothing exciting. W has had a couple of counselling sessions which he enjoys but is yet to put any of it into practice at home so we are still left having no clue of how to deal with it all. I find myself avoiding him because I am so tired of him blowing up at me over everything e.g. closing his window, getting the wrong cup out etc. Official diagnoses of Sensory processing and anxiety, the sensory stuff is mainly outgrown but has left anxious habits e.g. the clothing. There is a special meeting next week about the longevity of his school, so there may be another school move for him next year. We knew when he started that it might be the case though, and the other school would be better for A so I will leave it up to the fates to decide.
On the bright side, the weather is improving every day and we have spent a lot of time out in the yard moving gardens and making a new sandpit. I thinned and replanted all the strawberry patch and the glass house is all ready to be loaded up.
Sorry but i totally have to :ROFL::
that is too funny...ahhhh kids.
Miss M informed me that babies come out of belly buttons after a kindy session, I told her straight up that they also come out of vaginas. Her jaw dropped lol. I think that she was talking with her bestie that was born via c-section so they musta been swapping stories hahaha. too funny.
Are you sure that Kitteh is not a labrador puppy trapped in the body of a kitten? chewing power cords has raised my suspicions lol.
Arte: I was wondering how the sessions were going. does the psych have any tips on how to implement at home?
AFU: well, we are in FULL ON party prep in our house. Miss L is having a Mad Hatters tea party and Miss M is having a mermaid party. It is full on, expensive (even though i have hit all the $2 shops in a 200km radius lol) and the time consumption is outta control. why oh why do i have two september babies born only 5 days apart??!!! ...hang on, dont answer that :lol:
I spoke too soon lol. I will have to contact the psych and see what else we can do because I need help and it is all too slow. Just had the biggest ever supermarket meltdown disaster. My shins are likely to be bruised from all the kicking when I had to pick him up. He was totally feral - screaming, hitting me, pushing and tugging on the trolley, hurting the girls, absolutely hysterical and it just went on and on with no end. I have never been so humiliated. I am so tired of this. I struggle enough with being a mother at the expense of everything else I wanted to achieve in my life, and to have him making every day miserable makes it so much worse.
Christmas champagne???!:
why oh why do i have two september babies born only 5 days apart??!!! ...hang on, dont answer that
Arte - LOL @ E thinking you've got some bubs stashed in ya boobs.LOL Your backyard improvements sound awesome, strawberry patch sounds marvellous. I'm guessing there might be some competitive pumpkin growing this year??? Massive hugs on the supermarket meltdown. So hard. I think it's a really good idea to see the psych, let him/her know that you need some help and support as well. STRATEGIES! Even if you go away with one or two things that you can try, or suggestions on how to handle the escalated behaviour, that will help with feeling more in control. FWIW there's plenty more life coming when you will have the time and resources to get on with your own dreams. xxx
Cass, you might be onto something with the dog-inside-cat theory. There's already a rat-inside-dog animal in the house LOL. Your party prep sounds WILD. Mad hatters AND mermaids - woah! Did it not occur to you to pick two thematically-related ideas? (That's my inner-lazy mum speaking LOL)
This not-so-inner lazy mum has declared that no two children shall have parties in the same year :)
Thank MD xx
Unfortunately my girls have twigged on that they will choose their themes and there is nothing i can do about it :rofl:
Remember last year how Miss M declared a princess ballerina duck party?? I let the cat out of the bag by giving it to her.
Arte: wooooooooohhhh. that sounds EPIC man. Miss E at the tender age of 20 months can stop the entire supermarket in its tracks with her tantrums but i still can tuck her up under my arm footy style and high tail it outta there...just thinking of trying to do that with Miss L is a logistical nightmare :(
I would be just totally exhausted and depressed at having to deal with that day in day out. I hope that the psych has some more immediate tips and tricks for the short term everyday stuff, because that is just too darn hard to negotiate.
I called the psych in tears this morning and she has scheduled an appointment for DH and I next week. I ranted that he was a horrible kid and I wanted nothing to do with him and now I think she wants to assess my mental status :( I don't care anymore. I can't keep doing this. It has been so so long and I am just so tired.
Hopefully we can have a nice weekend with good weather and get the yard stuff finished. I have it in my mind that life will somehow be better if we have a functional sandpit, 'cos of course that will solve all my problems lol.
:hug: It's probably good that she's heard you in full-rant mode, it helps convey the severity of the situation, especially in terms of your own coping-ness. No point focussing all attention on W if other parts of the family are in crisis. So some of the strategies needed aren't just about W's behaviour, but also getting you some support so you're not feeling overwhelmed. It's been a long slog for you, it would drain anyone's mental wellness levels. :hug:
And you know what, the sandpit aint such a bad idea. Having small goals and achieving them incrementally has got many a woman through the grind of child-rearing.
We're currently doing our long-planned cubby-reno. We are turning it into a chill-out zone for the girls, including mummy MD. No-one else in the family knows this, but it's a project I hatched purely to give all four of us something to work together to achieve. It's like building a positive structure into our life. We've got the process of planning & negotiating & doing, but then afterwards we've got a permanent space to use as a hangout. Hopefully it generates happy family vibes for a long time to come.
I was coming in to delete that but I was too slow. I did a stock take at a department store a couple of weeks ago and losing a few nights of sleep have thrown my balance right off and everything has got on top of me. It is hard to claw my way back when it gets like this.
MD, the cubby reno sounds like a great idea :)
Aw, don't feel like you need to censor yourself. :hug: I know the sleep deprivation part is bad, but how was it being back at a paid job?
Alright I guess. I got locked in on the first night after everyone went home and set off all the alarms, cos that is just the sort of thing that happens to me lol. Then there was a lot of joking about it the next couple of nights, but I did talk to some people about things that weren't kids so that was quite good.
Sorry, I will keep my grumbling out of here. It will pass.
Cass, whilst I have drawn the line at parties, I have let them choose a cake each. OMG. Three cakes in a week. W wanted zombies but has just switched to Star Wars. Loads of cool Star Wars cakes on the net, but most are above my skill level. The girls are just about coming to blows over who is having a dora cake lol. I think I will let them look at the woman's weekly cake book at IL's tonight - they are fickle enough still to change their mind when the next thing comes along :)
Arte: basically as far as Miss L is concerned as long as the cake has popping candy stashed somewhere on it, we are on a winner lol. gross...but she loves that stuff (well, the theory behind it anyway...we'll see what she really thinks when the time comes haha).
Ahhh stocktake...I have fond memories :) There was something about it i found satisfying: i felt like i was getting something tangible done...and i got to see all the different kinds of crap that were stocked in the store hahaha (how gross and dirty is it under the shelves?!?!!! eeewwwww).
How did L's birthday go?
I was a checker at the stocktake. It is all high-tech now - the counters had iPods to scan everything and then a sheet printed off for us to check they hadn't missed anything.
Hope everyone has been having happy birthdays (MD included!)
My grandfather had a stroke last week and I went up to see him so I was upset and booking flights on A's birthday, missed W's and we have shifted E's to tomorrow so I could be home for it. My grandfather is one of my favourite people. It is incredibly hard to see a man that has always been so strong and able reduced to being as helpless as a baby and needing help to toilet :( I try to console myself that at least we still have him and he is improving each day, and that he won't remember much of this time when he is recovered. That doesn't stop it being heartbreaking though. We will all be up there in two weeks so I am looking forward to seeing him further along the recovery path.
Arte :hug:. So sorry to hear your grandfather has been so unwell. It must be so hard to see him like that. I hope he continues to recover and improve more and more. Sorry as well it all happened in the middle of the birthday patch, just another layer of stress, etc that you didn't need. How's he going now?
Well we've popped out the other side of our birthday week, I begrudgingly shared mine with Father's day (boo!) but made the most of it with breakfast in the Barossa, then arvo tea for the dads. For E's birthday we went to the show - always a big day out, but a huge success in birthday terms. I did DIY showbags & told E that we'd won a showbag competition on the radio and the showbag fairies had delivered them to our house in their van. PMSL. I'm am sooooo messing that kid up and she will hate me for all the fairy-based lies I have told in her short life.
Other than that, all going ok here. E has been unwell for a couple of days, massive temps last night but much chirpier today. How's everyone else going?
Party month is also over in our neck of the woods :dance:
This year I kept it super simple as seriously i just couldnt muster the energy or enthusiasm. I mean, I was super excited for the girls etc but was way more excited on their birthday proper than for the party. I think i am still struggling with a post move blue period. thankfully the girls didnt seem to notice that there were less culinary choices or less expressive birthday cakes this year: but i did feel bad :(
Arte: oh that is just awful :( My grandfather is starting to get so old now and his ability to live independently is shrinking almost by the day. I am not coping too well with that as he is my father figure in my life and was always the capable, strong and solid part of my life. The concept that he is mortal and fallible to old age is one that I cannot accept! Gosh darn it!
I truly hope that your grandfather is able to make speedy recovery and can get back to being himself again :hug:
MD: bahahahaha! i love it! look with Miss E it could go either way: either she will be so smitten with all the effort you went to to create her dreams or she will be super cross when the truth comes out lol...i'm going to hedge my bets and say she might do a bit of both :lol:
which brings me to the next thing: destroying dreams. Ok, so I have an inkling that this might be the year that Miss L realises that there is no Santa et al. The school is very competitive and revels in 'being the first' in everything and my spidey senses tell me that the closer it gets to christmas there will be a race to be the 'big kid' that no longer believes in santa and will go about laughing at all and sundry who still want some of the magic. So tell me Sept Mamas: Do your kids still go for the whole fantasy of it all? My girls are right into it. I am already thinking that when Miss L has her bubble burst that i might need to beg her to not tell Miss M. I think that I will try with reason and tell her to remember how fun it was to wait for santa and believe in him. what do you all think??
AFM: well DH is away jetsetting across the globe while i hold the fort in our big ol' lonely house. I think that our house is now trying to evict me...the heating crapped it and of course it has been below zero for the last two nights which equals a really unpleasant experience for all of us, and then in the wee hours of this morning the smoke alarm decided to have a party for no apparent reason (I am blaming it on dust or the huntsman spider who looked guilty as sin when I switched the light on). Poor Miss E was *beside* herself in fear and i was worried that it would set off a seizure, but thankfully nothing that i could discern. I think there *may* have been a brief absence one (which she gets in extreme stress) as she went deathly still with an iron grip...which is what it looks like when she has had one before...but because i was so busy making sure that we were not burning down I didnt get to look her in the face and see if she was really having one). this house has bad mojo and i just cant seem to shake it off :(
Cass, I truly sympathise with the no heating - my last house only had one heat pump that died every year in the coldest week of winter :( Can you get some sort of mojo healer out to your house? I don't know much about that but it seems quite common in Maori culture to have an elder bless/something a place to cleanse any unsettled pasts.
As for Santa...not sure what to do about that. I imagine that W will be realising soon although he has held on tight to the fantasy. I have heard him and E having a spat because my mum gave them wallets last year and said they were from Santa and E said they were from Nana and W wouldn't give up that it was Santa. I think the girls are happy with Santa being a fairy tale like the movies etc, but W reminds me of Fox Mulders poster - "I want to believe" lol.
MD, I don't think she will hate you for your fairyisms - she will appreciate that you put some magic into her life :)
Cass, I think your grandfather is doing very well for himself - I always admire his face booking ability! My granddad just got his first atm card a few days before the stroke lol. Growing up fatherless, he was the only male role model in my life. Some find him odd but I have always loved his stories and theories :) It is easy to look academically at someone and know that at 85 they have limited life ahead of them, but in your heart you can't imagine that anything will ever happen. He can't talk much but hopefully that will improve. He did try to feel up the physio a bit and gave me a big wink and thumbs up as he was doing it lmao, so he is still in there - always considered himself a bit of a ladies man, and bless that physio for not slapping him lol.
Seems like E got a huge chunk of attitude for her birthday lol. Apparently 3 years old is the same thing as being a grown up.
Yup. :lol::
Agh! so awesome to hear that your grandfathers cheekiness is still in there :) that's a good sign for his morale. And you are so right: intellectually you know that at their age it is a 'good innings' but even so, when you have spent your entire life with them in it...it is soo weird to realise that one day they will not actually be...it's a whole rejig of the world order!
Hi ladies - aaaah - I so need to reply to your last few posts - on a v. tight timeframe today - school hols still eating my brains plus I'm working this week (who thought that was a good idea? LOL). But needless to say I'LL BE BACK.
Attitude, I hear you. Except not with a 3 year old! And the thing that is driving me INSANE at the moment is the WHINING. I try to ignore it and tell her that I can't understand when she's whining, but DH and DD1 keep running in circles around her when it starts (just to make it stop but of course it doesn't). :wall: I went back to work yesterday and my co-worker asked me if I'd had a good rest last week PMSL and I said NO, IT'S SCHOOL HOLIDAYS and then he asked if we'd had any fun and I said NO, NO FUN AT ALL. :p I think the problem is that we need an actual holiday - it's been groundhog day for months here.
MD, I have a 5 year old with the whinge thing going on. I couldn't even count the amount of times I tell her in a day to use her nice voice! On the plus side, she has finally started keeping track of where her things are instead of losing them to the ether as soon as they are out of her hand (Praise the Lord!!!).
Only one more day of school holidays to get through :) It has been slow going - overspent on holiday in the first week so we can't really go out of town and the weather has been shocking so there have been many movies here. I get the whole groundhog day thing, it would be lovely to just do something different. And I seem to have upset the IL's and they haven't offered to take any kids over the holidays so we are all here getting on each others nerves. To be fair, I did snap at MIL so probably deserve it lol
Up bright and early this morning - E woke at 3.30am absolutely hysterical and furious at me because I ate her dream ice cream lol. She always has such vivid dreams.
OMG summer is never going to come! It rained most of the second week of the holidays, then we had 1.5 lovely days and now we are back to rain. It has been a long and dreary winter here.
They seem overly fond of burning coal in fires here and the town has a distinctive tang on a cold day.
we are twins separated at birth Arte!! OMG. THIS WEATHER SUCKS lol. it will never be warm...on sunday it was 30 and sunshiney and now i am in a jumper and have a scarf on...wahhhhh!
but i guess there is some sense of summer in that the firies have started burning off here today. so it is cold and shrouded in smoke.
Hello, darlinks
Ok - re the Santa Secret. One thing needs to be made clear: it doesn't really matter whether you think FC is real or not, or if the turds, I mean kids, at school think FC is real or not, what matters is Believing in The Magic of Christmas. And everyone can Believe in the Magic of Christmas, no matter how old or young they are. Some sad people don't believe, and they say things about Santa. But that doesn't matter. Christmas is a time of sharing with and being with the people you love. You can talk about how people celebrate Christmas in lots of different ways around the world, and they are all ways of Believing in the Magic. Even if a person wasn't sure, it's nice to go along with it and enjoy it and not spoil it for the people who do believe. My nephew and DD1 were both worded up this way, and they were both happy to Keep Believing. And if that doesn't work, you can always throw in the threat that only people who Believe get left a present LOL.
Cass, how's stuff going in your big ole house? I hope you're not still feeling out of sorts like you were while DH was away. It's starting to sound a bit like depression, so if your low mood continues, check that out. Find some mental-wellness allies, get those supports in place so if things suddenly turn bleak, you've got a plan.
Arte, how's your grandpa going? I hope the weather has warmed up a bit, we've got the aircon going today (on low) LOL, but I hate the heat and would gladly trade (provided there is at least some watery sunshine). I think I was SADSing again this week, so I've had to drag myself out into the sunshine (even though I feel like I'm gonna burn into a crispy ex-vampire every time). It's not safe to go out there right now, though. There's a battle going on involving nerf guns and water bombs so I'm staying in my trench.
Anyhoo, I'm procrastinating my arse off over a tedious assignment, so I'd better get on with it before it drags itself over and bites me. WISH ME LUCK, ladies.
MD, wishing you a heap of luck and inspiration for your assignment.
My granddad is still in hospital. I am going up next weekend to visit. Twice now he has got out of bed and fallen since he can't walk. Our hopes of him going home again are slowly fading :(
After my complaint about the dreary weather we had an absolute stunner of a day, about which time I remembered that I don't really like the heat and had to flit from shade to shade. I am also getting a permanent frown lines from all my squinting because I can't figure out what to do about the glasses and sunglasses thing lol.
All going well here. W has been going to counselling for the last couple of months and it seems to be making a difference. They have taught him some awareness of when his engine is running too fast and tips to bring himself back down. Although he tends to be happier and relaxed during the holidays and start of term so I guess we will see if the stress levels rise as the term progresses. It is nice for now anyway.
Cass, how are you going with E's diagnoses?
I got a haircut for the first time in ages the other day because both my licence and passport need renewed and somehow managed to still come away with a god awful passport photo and yet to see the drivers licence one but not holding high hopes lol.
Having an awesome day here! Chased up a couple of refunds from bond/electricity/enviro rates, and checked the balance of a property I have been guessing rates for the last couple of years - way in credit! Almost 2K coming my way!!
Then on the way out of Kindy Miss A found a snail, then just lying on the path a few steps away was another one for E which means they are both happy and there is no snail envy/fighting :) It is all coming up Arte today!
Arte I LOL'd at you remembering you don't like the heat. I recently bought myself an umbrella with a SPF factor so that I can take the shade with me. I'm also getting to the point where there's going to have to be some glasses/sunglasses action too - I can't work it out either.
That's great to hear that W is getting benefits from the counselling. Having a shared language ("engine running too fast") helps with being able to bring it to his attention when he's at home too. Having a 5 or 10 point scale can be useful as well. Anyway I hope you see the improvements continue during the term too.
Finally got my essay in, later than late, but it was still accepted and marked, did quite well even after it was penalised for lateness and wordiness. LOL. Anyway, got another couple of big ones over the next couple of weeks, so it's no rest for the wicked at my place.
MD, bummer about the overdue assignment, but yay for a good result anyway.
I think I have decided on a pair of prescription sunglasses and I will just have to change between them and my normals. I thought about contacts and normal sunglasses which may be cheaper, but my eyes are pretty sunken and black these days and I prefer my normal glasses so it isn't as obvious lol
And I was meaning to say thanks for your input in the blocked ears thread. I had a head cold last week that left my ears very blocked and I went home for the weekend so I had several flights to nurse my ears through. You might have saved me a burst ear drum :) I was holding my nose and swallowing constantly during the decents, something I wouldn't have thought to do because some long ago teacher told us we must never do that!
MD, I saw a real life narcoleptic! When I was visiting my grandfather in hospital, my uncle and his girlfriend were there too. Every time the conversation lulled, she would tip forward and start snoring!! Totally fascinating (from a psychology perspective and as someone who doesn't have to deal with it....). I can see how easily it can ruin lives though.
argh! i have been MIA big time!
MD: I so do not envy you with those assignments. blergh! but massive relief at still getting good marks despite the norti marks taken off lol.
I think that i am dealing with some mild depression TBH. the move has not done my mental health all that well and the shocker year with Emilia is really driven home as i go through her memory book and see the 'before' and 'after' pictures of our little family (before all the crap hit the fan and after). I have a good counsellor in melbourne and think we will go in as a couple at the start of the year when we get back, as i think i do need to debrief it all etc.
Arte: I was *so* sure that i had replied to the super snail find. we had a similar story except that for Miss M it was a dead snail and we all didnt realise as she carted it around for around an hour...she is desperate for her own 'pet' but for some reason only seems to be attracted to the dead things...caterpillar last week and a centipede thingy the other day hahaha.
I do the yawn trick for blocked ears on flights. i look like a no0b but it works lol. i also make sure that i have a pack of ear candles in my back pocket at all times. those things rock my world.
my passport photo looks like a mugshot. i am not kidding. it is so atrocious. i was hating on the woman taking my pic so much lol...she was a cranky old bird that killed my joy...and it shows hahaha.
Man, i need a haircut and a bikini wax...winter is over...time to de-fur lol (prolly shoulda put an image warning on there lol).
Re: Miss Es diagnosis...i feel relieved. i finally feel that what i knew was there is now recognised. Her neurologist right at the beginning did tell me that it would take roughly 2 years to diagnose, and it took just under, so i am happy for that. it changes nothing really for her care, just means that we have to keep taking her in every few months for chats and the like. it is all very hands off when there is not brain impact etc. she has an EEG coming up in March to compare to her last one. but thankfully it looks to be just a day stay (as opposed to overnight like last time). I am so super happy with her care at the RCH, they are super awesome people and her neuro is just right on the same page as us. so all good really :D
That is pretty tough news about your granddad. confidence within themselves can also be a huge hinderance to getting better and i have noticed that as my own grandpa feels less and less confident with his body that he is deteriorating at a much faster rate. it just plain sucks.