hi every one im new to this n i dont really know wot to put. i found out i was preg on 29th of sept n thn two days later started bleedin i phoned drs who z it was normal thn went to hosp 4 scan after phoin thm n tellin thm wot was happin, after doin the scan they z id misscarried now i feel so low my husband dont know wot to say to me n the same to him. i have only just stopped cryin i kinda feel uncomfortable round him n dont want to. i just needed sum one to talk to
Sara babe I'm so sorry, RIP Little Angel XXX
I hope that you are both being kind to yourselves, give your heart time to greive darling, we will all be here for you if you need us X
Each day since I misscarried, I have remembered that 'Gutted" feeling of despair.
I'm so sad that you have that feeling to remember now too.
I pray that one day you find it in your heart to try again, and you have a happy wonderful healthy pregnancy to come X
Murraycod all the best for you also. I see you have had a tough path to travel this year also, i hope you get the outcome you are hoping for very soon xo
Firstly I want to say how sorry I am for your loss...
I know EXACTLY what you mean... My DH was at work when I started to bleed, I had been cramping for about 4 hours before hand. I rang and told DH I was cramping and that he had to stay close by to home (He is a cop). He rang me back and I could hear him smoking (hasn't smoked since we started TTC). He told me he was really stressed due to cramping.
About half an hour later I started to bleed, I rang him and cried into the phone. He was home in 5 mins...
When he took me to the hospital (I was having really bad pain) it was weird. He wasn't talking, looking at me... he just looked uncomfortable...
I think that at first he felt shocked to see me in such a state (I don't usually cry), and in pain and I looked pale and just crap... He hated seeing me like that.. He was sad, it was his baby too...
I think thats why he was like that at first, lets face it boys are not very good at expressing themselves. We had some time off work together and got to really nut out how we were feeling (not all in one sitting, but over a few days).
I think it's easy to forget that they feel it too... esp. since they don't have to go thru the physical pain... and everyone handles grief differently.
Now we talk openly about it, I have been having some bad days which is why I am looking at these threads which is helping.
Sara, I'm so terribly sorry to hear about your loss. I too have a angel baby and was devastated when I found out I would never hold that baby in my arms. The main thing to remember is that it's ok to grieve and that there are no rules when it comes to grieving. Do whatever you need to do to get through this difficult time. For me, all I wanted to do (or could do) was lay in bed and cry. Others probably didn't think it was "healthy", but at the time that is what I needed to do.
Also, because the grieving process is different for everyone, it can be hard to share the process with your DH if he is grieving in a different way. My DH's way of hoping was to trying to distance himself from the emotional side of losing the baby. For him, he almost needed to think of it as not a baby yet, because I think it would have been too hard for him if he'd personalised things too much. I was the opposite. I needed to think about my little baby and wanted to do things to honour the little life that I held in my belly. I ended up having a star named for our angel.
Give each other time and hopefully you will both come to a point where you understand each others greiving and can support each other equally.
My thoughts are with you xoxox
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We'll always love our wedding night angel April 08
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found out i miscarried yesterday
April 08
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