Kinship care - The process, have you been through it?

[*Efjay*]

I just wanted to ask of peoples experiences with going through the process of applying for kinship/respite care.

My IL's have a almost 4 yr old in their legal care. They have had him practically from birth. The system now feels my IL's are too old & wanted to take him from them & put him in permanent care with someone else. Obviously this isn't something they want. He is there child now, they (we) are his family now.

Anyway to avoid this happening they had to agree to every second weekend that he goes into respite care. So they started the process of my SIL applying for Kinship care.
This was almost 12 months ago. They were meant to "fast track" her application so he would go to her not a stranger. Well, they have delayed it as much as possible but he now has to go into care each fortnight with another family as SIL application is still not complete.
The IL's were asked if they have a back up incase SIL isn't approved (what does this mean, should we read into that, there there is a problem with her application?)
So they have asked us. We are happy to do so.

So I just wanted to ask, has anyone done this, been through the application process, was it as grulling & invasive & insulting as it has been for my SIL? Hearing what its been like for her over the 12 months trying to get it all sorted is just crazy, the women she has doing it sounds like a real piece of work, nit picking the tiniest things, eg : Hazardous chemicals in laundry - aka - washing powder! but she listed it as hazardous chemicals?!.. Must keep bethroom/toilet in more hygienic state - SIL isn't they most tidy person, but she claims the only things she can think of about the bathroom/toilet was the potty seat behind the toilet that was probably a bit dusty looking as it hasn't been used in some time.

Stuff like that, SIL says its was minor things but the women listed them like she was raising her own 3 kids in a feral pig sty.
The women is apparently also late with everything but then demands SIL drops everything at a moments notice to return forms, sign things etc. I mean she has 3 kids & household to run of her own yet she is meant to jump at a moments notice to please this women.

So yeah kinda concerned if this is the "normal" to expect!

[lil_chookie]

We went through the approval for Local Adoption but the approval process is the same (we actually started being approved for Permanent Care). What you have talked about is kind of 'normal'. There is a safety checklist that needs to be completed and any cleaning products have to be out of reach/locked away. And yes the approval process is grulling & invasive (but I didnt find it insulting).

If you are unhappy with your assessing Social Worker (I assume that is the woman you mention above), you can speak to the head of the department.

The system is very slow & very frustrating, but you just have to stayed focused on why you are doing it.

[*Efjay*]

Thanks for that, I keep telling SIL she should complain about this women but she doesn't want to cause trouble. SIL found her insulting because of the way she claimed things are unhygienic & that she doesn't keep things clean enough.
I dunno if we would get the same person. DH did kinda of say "Do we really want to put our selves through it" but like you said, we both agree its just something we will need to do for the sake of this little boy remaining a part of the family.

Thanks, I know if we go into it expecting it to be hard then we should be ok. At least we have some "warning" after what SIL has been through. She thought it would be easy!