so thats my question
i know its completly safe for most of us but i still get scared a bit is this normal ? i still do it but not as often ,i think im being silly and freaking my self out .
gee ive had 4 kids before and it never worried me wasnt a thought .
i think its just because this bubby is ivf,took us sooo long to get and its been 10 years since ive been pregnant so ive forgotten sex is normal.
oh smithy your a worry girl
and poor dh is just as scared to be honest,he really is.he wants it, but doesnt... freaks him out ,he said he doesnt want to break anything.
I was scared and we certainly didn't DTD as much in the first trimester as we had pre pg, I had a few bleeds (2 x old blood and 1 x new blood) and that made us even more apprehensive... the bleeds didn't happen after DTD.
But in hindsight we probably DTD more in the first trimester than we did the second trimester
I went through a time when I craved DTD but DP was scared but wouldn't say it upfront... and then there was a time when DP was really up for it and I was busy being ill
this may be tmi, but with ds, i couldn't get enough sex, especially in the 1st trimester! so we dtd all the time. with dd, the thought of it made me sick. so i think that if you're comfortable with it, and not experiencing any pain etc, you should go for it!
aww thank you girls,
well for now were going to have a dtd break and were both good with that gee we have the rest of our lives to get funky with it and only one chance at having this baby so all sex is on hold at least till i finish the first tri.
thank you for all you honest answers i really felt stupid .
No sex here either. Had probls getting this baby and had pre-term issues with previous one so a bit freaked out. To be honest I still get the urge but DH is too scared. We DTD perhaps three times and he couldnt make it over the line (if you know what I mean) he was too freaked out.
I'm pregnant with my first and my DH (bless him) has been too scared, he doesn't want to hurt the baby or cause a MC. I have explained that it's OK and the books say that the baby likes the movement etc, but if one of you if tense about it it's not going to be fun so I haven't pushed it.
We had our scan last week and all is looking good so I am hoping to make up for the lost time, lol, esp as I am feeling better and staying up later than 8pm!!
My GP said no DTD - because I had some bleeding (for 4-5 weeks off and on). When I went to my OB at 12 weeks, he asked when the last bleed was, and it hadn't been for a few weeks, so then he said it was fine to DTD again. I was too sick and we didn't end up doing much for a few months after that :-)
As you say, you have your whole lives ahead of you. 1st trimester with first baby I freaked out, but apparently the cervix can bleed a little easily (not a problem), which sex can cause. So to bleed after sex is normal, but for me, I just preferred not to have the niggling worry afterwards. Once I was sure the pregnancy was a sticker, I would relax somewhat.
thank you all very much,ive still been thinking about it and the more i do i say no more sex im to scared
and nell its so true ok weve had the sex but now im still worrying if the baby is ok or if ill start bleeding oh the worries but now even having spoken to dh i feel so much better and relaxed its like now i know i dont really have to give it to dh cause his not keen on it as well and before i would even get a bit ****ty knowing maybe i should do the deed with dh and didnt really want to but would have as a favour IYKWIM
so i just feel better knowing that me and dh are on the same page the more my pg goes on i think ill be fine ,but honestly thanks girls for being so honest i thought i was a sex looser
As for the no sex - we're 21 weeks + and done nothing since my BFP under Drs orders and TBH I am glad because I was freaking out about DTD whilest pregnant JIC.
FWIW - if you are ok with it there are other ways for him if you catch my drift Thats one thing I have been making sure that DH is still looked after even if it means I miss out. Sorry if TMI
DH and I were too afraid in the first trimester as well, Smithy. Not to mention the crinone and pessaries were the biggest turn off for me as well lol.
We DTD a few times in the second trimester, but once reaching the third tri, DH was absolutely freaked out about it all. He was so worried that DS would arrive early if we did. He would get cranky with me if I suggested it and backed him into a corner PMSL...
Completely normal feelings considering all you have been through to be at this special moment in your lives
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