here we go with another tantrum....

[beckoes]

DD is 14 months old and has alway been a happy calm baby, and we always have so much fun together, but the last few weeks have been really hard, crying alot, hard to distract, i wrote another post about her being distructive, which is fine, but if i ever say 'NO' about something she just cracks it, i guess she is just starting to become a proper toddler, but will just sit down and scream if i wont let her do something (for a good reason, i pick my battles), no matter what i do.
for a week i was putting it down to teething and kinda letting her get away with stuff but its going on and on and im starting to wonder if it really is teeth, (she only has 2 bottom and 4 top so its probably not the back ones yet) i know about them pushing boundries at this age and seeing what they can get away with, and i dont say no about something and then give in just cause she is screaming cause i dont want her to think thats how things work, but at the same time i hate seeing her get so upset.
Is it just a phase etc, if so....someone must have some tips on how to deal with it better, i can feel myself getting angry at her sometimes and i dont want that! i have a little mantra ''what does this sittuation require me to do'' and that normally helps...except now i dont have to answer its not really helping anymore
this was probably just a bit of a vent really... thanks

[kirsty_lee]

omg, I dont' have any advice because I am currently about to rip my hair out with dd. She's exhausted from not sleeping last night (and pretty much every bloody night) so I put her down for a nap at about 11.30. SHe's been up since 6 right. Well she LOST it.. screamed the bloody house down, and normally it's just a cry has a bit of a spaz and I can go in there and give her a bit of a pat on the bum yeah well not today... she was wrapping her legs around my hands/arms which were on her belly trying to rock her and she nearly bloody broke it. Then she was hitting me and biting me and just going NUTS. Even trying to pick her up she just went nuts. Tried to lay down with her goes nuts and then dp coems up and says want some help? and i just walked out so he brought her back down from her room to run around and tire herself out more and she's fine. But I am really struggling with being able to be happy and play with her when she carried on like that. I am sooo sick to death of the tantrums. Sigh. lol just realised I hijacked with my own vent hahaha sorry.. I dont have any advice, just want you to know your not alone babe!

[Arimeh]

Welcome to toddlerhood!!! Tanties over everything!!!! Miss M always chucks tanties, but I usually laugh at her cos she looks so funny (she bends down on the floor with her head on the carpet like she's praying - its so funny looking!!)

We just distract, distract, distract. Or just let her go. Its normal and they all do it. Heck, I think Aricyn has thrown at least 3 tanties today already!!! LOL

Eventually you get used to them, so they actually become amusing - and not so frustrating. Of course - it helps when you have plenty of sleep too.

KL - for you. We had a shocker last night too with Aricyn - so its not just the ones under 2 that have sleeping issues.

[RoyaUK]

Tricky isn't it? They're starting to understand everything but can't talk to be understood themselves. I often think it must be like us going to a foreign country and really needing something but no-one can understand you.

My strategy is
a) are they hungry? feed them
b) are they tired? put to bed or do something else like sit down & read together
c) can I distract with something else until the overwhelming feeling they're experiencing is over?
d) try humour - this nearly always works, like peekaboo or surprise them with my actions (e.g. hide & seek)
e) hand over to DH if he's around as i give up & go & have a cuppa!!!

It could be teeth though - molars do take a while to come through and they really really cause issues for my girls for a little while (lots more than a couple of days).

[Trillian]

If they aren't going to hurt themselves mid-tanty and I'm at home, then I usually walk away and leave them to it and they get over it pretty quickly when they haven't got an audience watching them and I don't have the time or the inclination in my day to sit and watch them do it and 'feed' their tantrum kwim? Especially if it was a tanty just because they couldn't watch another DVD or have another biscuit etc. Sometimes you just can't avoid a tanty no matter if you distract them or try to pre-empt a tanty happening because they just have no other way to voice their frustrations and if a tanty happens because you've stopped them doing something that could possibly hurt them, then I explained to them once they were finished why they can't do it so they eventually understand why you didn't let them do whatever it was they wanted to do.

[beckoes]

thanks ladies....i know its normal, was at my whits end this arvo after a rotten morning. this arvo was heaps better though, managed to divert two tanties and had one...Arimeh, we have the head on carpet and pray move here....or the sit and flap arms move!

Havent been on here for ages and after reading through a few old posts i read a few stories about people with 'real' problems (iykwim) that are quite inspirational and makes me take a different look at my day....really a few tanties is quite manageable compared to what some people have to go through.

[christy]

DD2 has become quite a tanty thrower lately. You'd think after the 6-8 hours of screaming that I've been through with DD1 that I'd be used to it? Or that with the health issues we've encountered this year, that I wouldn't get fussed over a few tantrums.... but oh it did my head in this week!!! She's been sick and DD1 has been in hospital and had issues with that. It doesn't matter, it still did my head in!

Don't worry... its okay to be frustrated with tantrums too. Just take a deep breath, and remember its not about you and how you parent. Just breath through them and if you can try to distract before they get too worked up.