Do you tell them?

[Sterla]

Do you tell your LOs that you love them? I'm not questioning whether you love them, of course we do - but do you actually verbalise it to them (whether they understand it or not).

The reason I ask is my parents never really said it to me, and as a result I am finding as a parent that telling DS I love him doesn't come naturally. I know my parents love me, but they very rarely express it to me. Now with DS, I'm sure he knows I love him - but I haven't said it to him much.

How important do you think it is to actually tell your kids that you love them? I think I'd really like to make an effort to change myself to tell DS I love him, and to tell him often.

[Nai]

I tell my girls all the time - at least once a day. I always say it as the last thing at night too "Goodnight sweetheart, I love you" The best thing ever was when DD1 said "I lve you too mummy" for the first time.

[westy]

I tell my children numerous times a day that i love them, i think it is a very important thing to tell them. I'm sure your son knows you love him just like you knew your parents loved you but to hear those three little words 'I Love You' is like muic to my ears.

[Arimeh]

Um.. rarely

For the same reason, I was never told as a child (or teen, or adult!) so I don't find it easy to say it to anyone (well other than people online - luv ya sterla ) but yeah, to actually verbalise it is VERY awkward for me.

DH is the same unfortunately

[lindsaymaree]

My parents never really said it much growing up, especially my dad as he's not big on "feelings". It wasn't something I thought about much untill I got a bit older and moved away from home.

Since living away from them and only getting the chance to see them every other month, I now make a point of trying to say it to them both as much as possible. It's funny how much I think just saying it has altered out relationships, I feel much closer to dad now that we can say it without it feeling weird or out of place, My Dad's always stoked when I finish a phone call with "love you dad".

[thepixie]

I tell her constantly.... more than once a day!
My dad said it to me occasionally (maybe more when I was little but I don't remember) and I am pretty sure that my mother has never said it to me ever.
But with DD it just seems natural to say it often.
Maybe if you start to say it it will start to feel natural IYKWIM?

[Sterla]

Mel, I'm the same - I can write and tell someone I love them easily (cards and letters were always filled with all sorts of mushy stuff), but I feel awkward saying it.

[*Infinity*]

Yep I tell DS a lot. I tell DP a lot too. Just something I've always verbalised I guess.

[Sterla]

I think you're right Pixie - it's something I just need to make myself start doing, and eventually it will feel natural.

[ubba82]

i say it to my kids at least a couple of times a day and they say it back. DS is usually the one to say it first - 'mummy, i really love you and daddy and ashy and ruby" and i reply 'i really love you too, matey'. I say it to DD1 before school and before bed. i think it is important for them to hear.

[Olive]

i dont ever remember as a child being told i was loved but i always tell my girls how much ilove them, multiple times a day!

[indie24]

I always tell DD that I love her. I don't remember my parents telling me much when I was growing up but they did more when I was older.

[Sterla]

Gosh, I feel quite bad now that I don't say it .

Mind you, come to think of it - when I say things to DS like "you dag" or "you funny little thing", etc, it's probably said with the same inflection as "I love you" - I've just replaced the words, lol.

Definitely something I want to work on, especially as DS gets older and understands more.

[Epacris]

I too come from a family that never, ever says "I love you", BUT it was never a problem, I always felt loved. They showed me every day that they did indeed love me. Actions speak louder than words?

Anyway, it is completely normal for me not to say I love you so I never have said it to my little ones. Then about 6 months ago, when DS really started to be able to string a sentence together, he started saying it to me all the time. I think our FDC lady says it to him all the time, so he naturally then just transferred it to a different situation. It is pretty amazing and very powerful. So now I do say it to them often. But DS now goes completely OTT with it and says "Mummy I just love you so much" (in a really soppy voice) and put his hands on my ears and twists my head so he can look me in the eye. I think that's kinda cute but kinda weird, anyway, I'm sure it won't last long. I'm sure he won't be still dong that when he's 16.

[westy]

I agree if you start saying it ...eventually it will just come naturally you wont even have to think about it you will just be saying it.

I must say i am a little suprised with the amount of people who have never been told by their parents that they love them, i find it quiet sad to be honest. I have always been told by both my mum and dad that they love me, it's something we still say to each other every time we speak or see one another. Like i said i tell my children numerous times a day that i love them and my DH and I also say it to each other numerous times a day....maybe the reason i dont have any issues in saying it is because froma very young age i have alwasy been told by my parents that they love me.

[Indadhanu]

My parents were pretty big on verbalising, actually, everytime they said no I couldn't go out it was usually prefaced by or followed by, we love you... They still say it now, and every time we are on the phone.

I say it alot. In fact, I usually say "hey Jazz, guess what..." and she comes to me for a kiss and laugh and say "I love you". It started out with me just saying "hey Jazz, guess what... I love you" and then kissing her. hehehehe, that happens multiple times a day! I say it a lot to Shel to. I'm just the kind of person who says it a lot.

[Epacris]

I must say i am a little suprised with the amount of people who have never been told by their parents that they love them, i find it quiet sad to be honest.

Please don't feel sad for me. I'm not sad about it at all. It's just a complete non-issue. Just because we don't say it doesn't mean we don't feel it. And we know we love each other because we show that we do in all sorts of different ways every single day.

[Jakabella]

I tell Bella seveal times a day and same with DH,I always tell Bella before she goes to sleep or when i tuck her in.

I always say it to DH before work and when we go to sleep.

My Mum told me all the time when I was little and still does now - and my Dad didnt say it as much but did say it - I was daddys girl so I certainly knew!

It will come naturally!!

Kate