2nd miscarriage in 4 months- do i have a break or go again?

[budgi]

Hi Ladies
well its been a while since i was last de- breifing to you alll.... since i was last here after the 1st MC , i waited for my 1st AF then hammer and tong fell again first shot. it was a xmas present. at week 6 started to spot U/S checked all was good, then follow up a week later all good, heart beat normal.
then last week at 10.5 weeks bleed again. U/S showed stopped at 8 weeks. had to have ER d&c the next day as bleeding was excessive. 1stMC was BO manifesting at 10.5 weeks,
on both occasions i had a migraine. 1st MC it was a migraine at 4weeks, 2nd migraine hit at 8 weeks.
so now i ask for guidance. Dr said only at 3 MC do you get investigation, but am heartbroken i feel i need a break for a couple of months and need to fine out what's wrong with me before i go again. what have others done. please help.

[kirsten74]

Budgi, if you feel like you need a break, then give yourself a break. Not only has your body been through a lot physically, but mentally and emotionally as well.

Give yourself a chance to heal. Get yourself as healthy as you can before trying again. The better place you are in when you TTC again, the better the results will be.

We had 2 mc very close together as well and was advised by my Ob to give it 3 months then try again. 3 months and 1 day later we were activiely trying and now have an almost 2 year old little boy.

Good luck and take whatever time you need before trying again.

Kirsten

[budgi]

thanks for the kind words Kristen xx i am afraid to leave it too long as i am 38 and time is precious , but i i know your right and yes, i feel i need to wait. thanks so much for sharing your journey xxx

[T-hopes]

budgi - ive just come across this post, i remember cahtting with you in the TTCAM/L forum back in Dec and im so sad to hear of another loss. I oftened wondered how you were going. Im sorry darlin. I know this post was a few months ago now but i just wanted to say hi and I hope you are ok (if thats even possible).
if you feel a break is what you need to get yourself back on track then do it! you know in your heart whats best, dont be scared to trust it xx

[budgi]

Thanks T-hopes yes i stayed away while pg then after the second loss i was numb and reading peoples journey was not even bringing me comfort to know i was not alone, i actually i felt like oh my god now i belong to a club i dont want to be a member of!! so stopped for a while.
i am going to a specialist and trying to find out any diagnosable reasons why i MC and then if they come up clean then i know i am left with the unknown but would rather that than to be sitting on my backside not treating the treatable.
but i cant shake my fear of it happening again cos if it does. i'm done. that's it. no babies for me

[JellyBean]

ooops - will send PM

[JennaJayen]

Budgi - Sending HUGE HUGS your way darl!

I've had 2 m/c's this year, one in Jan, and the other early this month. I also have a 15month old DS who was concieved after 4 losses (1 d&c for developmental issues and 3 early m/c's before 8 weeks), so I know how hard it is. I often think that maybe I should just give up rather than keep on trying for a brother or sister for my DS (It doesn't help when people tell me that I should just be happy with what I've got, boo to them they don't know how hard it is).

I haven't had any investigations, mainly because the majority of doctors consider me 'Too Young' (I'm 22) and that as I 'Already have a child that I've carried to term then nothing's wrong' which is a load of bs if you ask me.

I'm currently fighting with my local doctor to get tests done - I have to wait another 2 months before he'll consider doing them and by that point we'll have been TTC for 9 months, although we're currently having a break from TTC (without protection just to see what happens as everyone tells me that when I stop 'Trying' I'll get preg and it'll stick).

Good on you for seeing the specialist too!

If you ever need to talk (a sympathetic ear where you know what's said won't be said anywhere else is always very useful, especially on bad days) I'm here.

[Tegam]

i actually i felt like oh my god now i belong to a club i dont want to be a member of!! :

This exactly explains how i feel about both my MC and then Ectopic. I stay tho as i feel that none of us chose this and together we can get thru it!

I hope you find something that helps you!