Mum & I were talking about my spd the other day. She made me feel kinda crap about it tbh. Saying that the doctor who told me to take it easy was an idiot & that in order to fix the problem I need to walk & get some exercise so I'm fit (thanks mum, if I could I would!)
Anyway, she stayed at Grandma's that night & they got talking about it. She found out that Grandma had had the same when she was pg with her 3rd child. As they talked mum realised she had it when pg with my younger sister. Her 3rd. Mine also started with DS, my 3rd. Noone else in the family has had 3 kids, so no idea if it'd go further than that or not.
Anyway, I finally feel a bit more like mum is understanding now. After saying that was actually part of her reason for not having any more. She said it was too painful & that she felt like her body was falling apart. & that she was fitter in that pregnancy than she had been in either of her first 2. Only she says that hers was obviously not as bad as mine was.
So, has anyone else talked to their mum/grandmother about this? Does anyone else have another close family member who had it?
I'm pretty sure my mum would have told me if she had (mum likes talking about medical stuff) but my physio says that mine is particularly bad because my joints are hypermobile AND she says that can be genetic. But that could have come from my dad just as easily as it could have from my mum. I do remember mum being a bit obsessed with showing off how she could 'still' do handstands though when we were growing up, so she might be more bendy than most!
Nah I don't think my mum had it - and she probably wouldn't have known if her mother had had it, and I have no living grandmothers to ask!!! My sister didn't have it and she's had 5 pregnancies (3 live children) but my #3 pregnancy was better than my #2 pregnancy, just because it was treated basically from the day I got my BFP.
But that is the main reason why I am stopping at 3 kids - its just too painful and stops me doing stuff with my kids that I have at the moment.
My chiro told me that there is nothing much you can do to stop from getting it, but it does help if your core muscles are strong - to help hold everything in place when the relaxin sets in. How accurate that is, I dunno, but I have no core strength so she might be onto something?
Arimeh - I think the core muscle strength only helps so much. I was doing clinical pilates once a week for at least six months before this pregnancy in preparation and it was still so severe at 7 weeks that my physio told me that I would be in a wheelchair soon. I've avoided that at least around the house by basically not doing any walking. I go to the end of my street and back (about 50 metres) a few times a week and that's it. That means I'm not in much pain at all but obviously it's incredibly mentally frustrating for me and DD to be housebound. At the moment, I choose the mental frustration rather than have the constant physical pain that I had last time when I didn't know any better.
My physio told me core strength exercises could help too. I've been thinking about doing some pilates. A friend & I have a DVD that has pilates from 6 weeks to 4 months after delivery, & from 4 months onwards. It has different moves for if you have pelvis pain, so it doesn't strain it more. I thought I'd give it a go. At least it would make sure I'm doing my pelvic floors every day. Don't know how much it'll help, if at all, but it might.
I strapped with a bandage today to see if it'd make a difference when I did the vaccuuming, but not that I noticed, so back to getting DH to do it.
I'm having a real hard time with it & Mel, I agree that I definetely won't be doing this again. I've been suffering depression already coz I feel sp crappy about the state of my house & how sick I've been. I felt the same towards the end with DS, but that was only the last few weeks. I'm a bit worried that its started so early this time.
All I can do is hope it won't get too much worse than it is now. DH just got a second job, & will only be home about 4 hours a day, if that, so he can't do much to help. He won't be home much more than a few hours over night as well, so that makes it harder.
Fiona - yeah I think it can help keep you out of a wheelchair (since mine kicked in at 4 weeks, I was pretty sure I was going to end up in one last time round) but definitely won't stop it happening - so maybe just the severity of it. I found having constant treatment (like weekly) was the only thing that kept me active.
Believe me, when I had DD2, I wasn't overly ecstatic about the fact that I had just given birth, but the fact that I could just get up and walk - WITHOUT PAIN - was the sweetest treat of all. Pain just went immediately. It was awesome. Already I'm forgetting stuff about the birth but I will always remember that feeling
Yep, I do clinical pilates once or twice a week, ice up to three times per day and lie down as much as possible (once DD is in bed). Plus wear the pelvic belt 24 hours per day (even in bed).
Clover - get a belt or PM me your address (I think I have a spare), ice even if you don't feel sore, lie down as much as possible and generally do as little as possible. That's the ONLY thing that works for me - pushing through the pain just means you will be in more pain. I did that last time and it took 18 months to recover, hence the gap between DD and our next baby. This should be my third child, not my second and possibly last. Nothing wrong with my fertility just my bloody pelvis.
hi - it's interesting for me to read this thread, as it's just started 2 weeks ago with me. DH has already mentioned we may only have one bub, if this is what it's going to be like.
Mum didn't have it, but she mentioned Grandma was on bedrest for at least one of her pregnancies, but she doesn't know why and wishes she'd asked.
My core wasn't great, but I was exercising before getting pregnant and started clinical pilates at 8wks. I was also doing prenatal yoga and bellydancing. I woke up one morning at 21 wks in agony and that's pretty much it for me. I'm still doing clinical pilates once a week and I'm seeing an osteo almost weekly. I've just started seeing a physio who specialises in pelvic issues and will be going to an acupuncturist tomorrow.
Unfortunately my mind has not caught up with what my body's been telling it and I keep pushing myself through things. yesterday i spent 2.5 hours at an expo and was in agony for the rest of the day and ended up in tears trying to go upstairs to bed. Ice and rest seem to be the only things that really make a difference. It's frustrating and I feel like a whinger but I'm just going to have to come to terms with it.
Luckily I can work from home, which is what I'm doing today, so I'm going to alternate going into the office for home, depending on how I feel.
has anyone been able to do other kids of exercise with SPD? I'm concerned about losing fitness all together and was wondering if doing upper body stuff whilst sitting on a chair or fitball would be OK.
Fiona, if you have a spare & are willing to part with it I'd happily take it. I have no idea where I'd find one TBH. I was going to get one of the support belts you get at Big W, but not sure if its the same thing.
I haven't tried ice. Only heat. I had no pc when pg with DS, so I had noone for advice & had no idea what it was til DS was 4 months old & I got a new pc. I'd asked a gp & an ob by then & got no help. Well the gp told me what was going on & to take it easy, but that was only a week or 2 before birth. The ob looked at me like I was stupid & told me its coz i was older....at 24??? Hmm...
So I'll try ice.
Tashybabe - Thats my biggest problem. With DS I had no idea what it was, so I just kept going. I was in tears most nights coz of the pain. Mine eased off after a while, but DS was 21 or 22 months before I felt it was completely better. Even then I'd feel it after a huge day.
This time I really can't take it easy. DH is working upwards of 14 hours a day, so can't help. My mum is 40 minutes drive away, so can't do much for me. But does try when she can. I'm thinking about asking my gp/ob about in home help. I don't know much about it, but if I can't even vac the floors now, how on earth am I gonna last another 22 or so weeks with 3 other kids & a house to look after? My loungeroom floor needs vaccuuming every day. Every second day & you'd think we had pigs living here! Its that non stop stuff that I just can't do.
I got SPD really bad with this last pg, it is the only reason I'm not going back to have a fourth for at least a few years if at all. My physio and dr both told me that having subsequent pgs so close together is what made is worse ( body not having a proper chance of recovery from all the hormones).
There is no family history of SPD at all on my mum's side. But then again they don't get stretchmarks either and I am covered in them. Not sure about dads side, we don't have contact with them, but I would be curious to know.
nickle - I feel like that alot. Not many people IRL have even heard of it, let alone get how bad it is. Especially since most of us really don't winge all that much about it outside BB! I know alot of women who've had babies, but have only heard of one other with spd before I had it. & that happened while she was in labour, not through the pregnancy.
It seems even the ob I asked about it last time though I was just a sook too. Even though I put up with it for a good few months before even asking about it!
No family history here either, I had it baaaaad with my second pg, no signs at all during my first.
I was actually pretty fit - had been bellydancing for ages prior to my 2nd pg and I often wonder if it was the increased mobility in my pelvis from all that dancing that did it. Ssssssh you didn't hear it from me...
I think it's one of those things - people expect that a heavily pregnant woman will have some (minor) pain/discomfort - women at that stage of their pregnancies tend to complain loudly and soak up the attention - unfortunately this means that those who have an unusually high level of pain get ignored/overlooked even often by their caregivers.
Here's my advice: whatever you do, don't push through the pain!!!
Clover - I can't 100% promise but I KNOW I have two, just need to find my spare. PM me your address because you'd be most welcome to it.
Heat is probably the worst thing you can do. Your pelvis is already inflamed, you need ice to cool it and settle it. I put one on once DD has gone to bed and then put another one on as I'm going to go to sleep. If I get chance before DD wakes up, I also do it in the morning. So usually three times per day. Also sleep with a pillow between your knees.
Although I'm housebound because I can't walk far and don't drive, I've been able to struggle on by getting DP to jiggle his shifts and putting DD into childcare for two days a week. BUT, a couple of BB girls have told me about a scheme through which you can get in-home for your kids for 13 weeks. I haven't got desperate enough to use it yet but with three kids, I think it's something you should consider. Will dig out the stuff and send it to you.
Yep, I hear you on the whinging thing. I didn't say much in my last pregnancy because I kept being told it would go away after the birth. So I pretty much carried on as normal despite being in A LOT of pain because I thought I was being a trooper. Even sent DP back to work after five days even though I was wheeling myself around the house in an office chair because I was so delighted to be a mum, the pain didn't matter. Well, that was dumb because six months later I still couldn't walk more than five minutes at a time and spent a lot of time in the house. Couldn't even get down comfortably on to the floor to play with DD for 12 months and ended up in tears when I had to ask another mum to take her on a bouncy castle cos I couldn't do it myself. The pain was one thing, being isolated (I don't drive) and not being able to play with my daughter was extremely upsetting.
So, I've learnt my lesson. I never, ever want to feel that way again so now I speak about it very vocally and don't give a rats if people think I'm a whinger because out of the last three years, I've been pain free for about six months. I usually find that when people ask about the pain, if you tell them that it feels like there's a guy holding each leg ripping you apart through your vagina, then people get the gist. I tell DP to imagine being kicked hard in the balls every 30 seconds and see if he'd go around with a happy smile on his face.
The good news is that if you do things to manage it, you can control the pain levels. I'm in much less pain this time around because I'm managing it much better. I'm going totally bonkers from not being able to leave the house BUT the upside is that the pain is under control.
Thankyou all. Will pm you tomorrow Fiona. Gotta clear my pm's first! The ice thing makes alot of sence! I actually bought an anti inflammitory gel a few weeks ago, only to get it home & realise I couldn't use it!
I was also told it'd go away within 6 weeks of birth. That part sucked. Waiting months on end for it to finally go away. Trusting your care givers, to end up feeling like you've been lied too.
I also tell everyone about it. I like the way you describe it above I usually go into detail, trying to get the point across. That you feel like the pubic bone is broken, then the sharp pains in your groin with every step you take. The nerve pains if you turn your foot the wrong way. The outside hip joint pain after you've done too much. Thats all I have for now. I'm waiting for the rest.
Bed isn't too bad here yet. I used to wake up, kinda feeling like my pelvis had been pushed too hard back together. Like there was fire right on my pubic bone. & the hip I slept on was very hot & sore if I stayed in one spot for too long, but I haven't got that yet. & I can still roll over in bed...that suprises me! It was a bit later that all started with DS, so I guess I have plenty of time!
Do PM me your details clover - pelvises of the world unite!
You do have to listen to your body - if it's starting to get sore, then you need to listen and stop doing it OR make sure you ice a lot that day if you have to carry on doing what's making you sore. There were days where I had to do a lot of bending because I was packing the house ready to move - pretty unavoidable but I would then ice for three hours in the evening so that I wouldn't be sore the next day.
As far as post-recovery goes, mine was so long because of the birth. For MOST women it does go away within six weeks BUT the birth also impacts that. I had a long chat with my physio a couple of months ago and she basically said:
1. The position you're in and the length of the pushing phase can further damage your pelvis. It's not the length of the labour as such, just the pushing phase. In my case, she told me I had to make sure that my caregivers would take me for a caesar after 20 mins pushing. Given that it took almost three hours of pushing which did no good and I then had a high forceps delivery with DD, I wasn't confident with this one that I would get her out within 20 minutes OR whether I could trust my midwives/ob to listen to that instruction about a 20 minute limit.
2. Usually a caesar is not recommended as it generally takes longer to recover from than a vaginal birth. This is because a caesar cuts into the muscle and the muscles are needed to support the pelvis. However, a caesar does not have the potential to further damage the pelvis itself which a vaginal birth does. I asked her how long for the muscles to recover and she said best case scenario if you do the exercises they recommend, a couple of weeks. Worst case scenario a couple of months.
Based on that and the fact that a couple of months sounds like an absolute walk in the park compared to the 18 month recovery I had last time following a VB, I've chosen an elective caesar.
I'm not trying to sway you one way or another, I'm just mindful of the fact that you had a long recovery last time and I'm also conscious that it took me A LONG time to get decent information that allowed me to make an informed decision about this birth so hope that helps you.
Fiona - I note you're in Melbourne. It would probably be difficult for you to get there, but I've just started seeing a physio who specialises in pelvis stuff in Malvern Women's and Men's Health Physio
From what I've read on the internet and the information the physio gave me, birthing position is essential to prevent further damage. They recommend against forceps or ventouse or anything where somemone grabs your legs apart. The best positions recommended are either on all fours or on the side (even squatting is out). The worst is flat on your back or partially seated, as the pressure transfers to the pubic bone.
The other thing is to take a peice of ribbon or string that shows just how far you can spread your legs without pain and tie it around your knees, so no-one forces the legs open. Water birth can also help. I'm planning a home water hypnobabies birth so hope I can get it. Though when I'm feeling really sore I get pessimistic and imagine bub will end up breech or something and that wil really stuff things up.
I read a birth story where bub was born ok even though mum barely parted her legs to let him through (i know that keeping your legs together can damage bub, so they just have been very careful).
The way I've described the pain is - imagine someone's put your hips in a vice, taken a mallet or baseball bat to your pubic bone and then bashed your lower back around just for kicks. Then try walking, climbing stairs, rolling out of bed etc.
clover - one of the tricks the physio taught me is when rolling over in bed, don't roll over on your back. Say you're on your right side (pillow bw your knees). Keeping your knees togther, prop yourself up on your elbows or hands and knees then lower youself gently to the other side. I also now get into bed this way, rather than sitting and swinging my legs over. It still hurts, but not as much. My physio said the most important thing is to stop the inflammation, so rest, ice, how you position yourself really counts.
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Anyone else have a family history of spd?
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I usually go into detail, trying to get the point across. That you feel like the pubic bone is broken, then the sharp pains in your groin with every step you take. The nerve pains if you turn your foot the wrong way. The outside hip joint pain after you've done too much. Thats all I have for now. I'm waiting for the rest.
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