pelvic instability - how do you manage with a toddler???

[belfie]

I've got a horribly niggly/clicky right hip which has recently diagnosed as pelvic instability (pelvic girdle pain or all those other interchangeable seeming names). I think I had it in my last PG (but not diagnosed properly) from ~25-30 weeks then it settled (or maybe it wasn't the same given it settled!?).

Anyway, this time, whether it's cos of lugging a 13kg toddler around, being on my feet more, next PG I dunno - but it's started earlier and it is getting worse worse worse. I got given a pelvic support brace on Saturday. Since then I'm getting even more pain on both sides of sacroiliac joint, my right hip in partic seizes up and I can't put any weight on it - particularly overnight and in the morning. I'm exceedingly lucky in that my DH works from home a lot of the time and has been lifting DS for me during the day... but soon he'll be out somewhere and honestly I don't think i CAN lift DS at all in the night or first thing - I can barely keep myself upright, and often I'm hanging onto the nearest furniture to do so(and DS is still in a cot) . I've resorted to groceries online as shopping trolleys leave me cramping up and unable to move.

I've been seeing my osteo weekly since it's flared up, and my physio (who diagnosed it) said to come back if it gets worse (but she just diagnosed, didn't treat it per se). I guess my question is how much worse should it get? What else can I do? And how on earth am I supposed to manage a busy toddler? Getting to the bottom drawer of the dishwasher is a long-lost dream, i've been in pain all day - and I've been trying to do everything right! I'm trying to stay off my feet, do activities in small bursts, minimal lifting etc. I've read the pelvicinstability.org website and their tips - and was doing a lot of those things already, but I guess I wanted to know what others did to manage it? I think I've got a pretty easy/supported situation, so it scares me that i've barely managed today. Should I try a different physio/osteo? I'm also high risk of GD (was on insulin & GD last PG) so i really wanted to keep moving/fit/active as I think the similar issue contributed to being on insulin last time - i couldn't keep my BSL's down by walking. (GD test being done later this week ).

So yeah, guess I just needed to vent and would love to hear what others found helped? A hug or two wouldn't go astray either .

Edit: I'm actually wondering whether the support belt has made it worse, has anyone else found this? I just can't believe that it's been so much worse the last few days - or maybe it was just heading that way anyway

[~clover~]

I wish I could give you answers, but I can't. I have the same problem. Have you tried ice? I've used ice a few times at the end of a big day & its helped.
Other than that & staying off your feet/laying down as much as you can, I'm not really any help.
Sorry, here's the you need though.

[Traveller]

First of all You have my fullest sympathy. Pelvic instability is awful and so debilitating.

I saw a chiro who helped me a lot but I was still in a lot of pain. Some things that might help you are:

crutches for use around the house. They gave me so much relief.

always have your son in a pram or trolley whenever you are out. It will help hold you up. Don't try to pick him up unless you have to and always brace yourself by bending your knees. If you cannot get him in and out of the cot, then consider co-sleeping for a while.

Keep your knees together whenever possible. This is harder in bed at night so keep a pillow between your knees and tie it there with an old pair of tights if need be.

Try to avoid walking uphill or upstairs. Do whatever you can to avoid this as it will just make you sore.

Leave the dishwasher - concentrate on yourself and the housework can wait. Get friends to help when they come round and accept offers of help. Hire a cleaner one hour a week if needs be.

Vent whenever you need to, either on here or to a friend. It might not take the pain away but it may help you feel more emotionally able to cope.

I hope some of that is helpful to you

T
xx

[Arimeh]

Google pelvic instability and see the organisation site - they have heaps of great tips there. One thing - definitely don't push a trolley full of groceries, thats one of the worst things you can ever do with SPD.

It really and truly sucks - I had it from the moment I got my BFP with DD2 - and I had 2 toddlers to run after - so I definitely feel your pain.

[Traveller]

Google pelvic instability and see the organisation site - they have heaps of great tips there. One thing - definitely don't push a trolley full of groceries, thats one of the worst things you can ever do with SPD.

oh yes, sorry. I meant use a trolley to push your son instead of carrying him, but for sure get someone else to push the groceries. Or shop online.

[belfie]

Clover - I got confused by my osteo saying heatpack and my physio saying ice! I'll try ice and see what helps most I guess. Thanks

Traveller - tbh I think my mind is still bugging out at the thought of crutches but I guess it makes sense if it keeps me more mobile. I might just sit here in denial-land for another day or few tho... . Thanks for the suggestions. I'm thinking I might move DS to a big bed... honestly tall DH, preggie me + body pillow and DS actually would not FIT in our bed. I've got cleaners coming fortnightly atm, I won't put DS in a trolley cos that just sets me off, but the stroller is still ok. I know you're right about leaving stuff, just the house is a bombsite and part of me is petrified this is gonna be status quo for the rest of my PG. I'm watching DH run around like a crazy chook (and I know the feeling - he had a bad back for 8 months last year) and just ... just wondering how we manage this. I guess we just pay for people to do the stuff we can't do, for as long as we can afford it. As for offers of help... well there are none. IL's are away atm, BIL and SIL are totally clueless and my family are all interstate. Everyone else I know just seems to be busy and caught up with their own lives.

Arimeh's Eden - have already looked at the site thanks. As for managing with 2 toddlers, how on earth did you do it? Did your DH do everything? Did you just do it through the pain? Honestly there are some things that just HAVE to be done! I've already got DH doing any washing up, I'm not vaccumming, I avoid picking things up off the floor, i'm minimising lifting DS, i'm using a body pillow, knees together etc etc.

I don't know, I just feel blue i guess. Thanks for all the hugs, it helps. I want to be so happy about my PG and my beautiful little girl wriggling away in there - but I've just been sick almost the entire time (bar 2 weeks), I've just finished work yesterday (early) cos I'd been off sick so much, I'm finally feeling better - now this! Plus if I get GD it further impacts our crazy diets anyway (we have a big range of dietary restrictions)... I guess I'm just having an attack of the poor me's and i always feel like I shouldn't, that I should be so grateful for what i've got.

My motto is normally the good old "change what you can, accept what you can't change" but sometimes I guess it just deserts me. And i know that whether I cry for an hour, day, week or a month it won't change the situation... all I can do is take control of what i can. Thanks so much for listening.

*mentally pulls up on socks, girds loins (how very appropriate!), squares chin and attempts to think positive*.

Ok, DH is getting me an ice-pack, a hot drink. I'm gonna try sleeping in our spare bed (soon to be DS's bed) as the mattress is firmer. And tomorrow I'll see obs and osteo and see if they have any helpful suggestions.

Thanks again

[Arimeh]

Arimeh's Eden - have already looked at the site thanks. As for managing with 2 toddlers, how on earth did you do it? Did your DH do everything? Did you just do it through the pain? Honestly there are some things that just HAVE to be done! I've already got DH doing any washing up, I'm not vaccumming, I avoid picking things up off the floor, i'm minimising lifting DS, i'm using a body pillow, knees together etc etc.

Um, no I did everything still? Guess if its gotta be done you just do it I suppose. I know that when the pain got too bad of a night time I would pop a couple of panadol before I went to bed and that helped me sleep for a few hours relatively pain free. With picking stuff off the floor, I sometimes made it into a game and the kids helped me? But usually I would just sit on my fat bum on the floor and throw things into tubs that I had around the lounge room. LOL

I did have physio from 7 weeks to 28 weeks, and then had an osteo appointment at around 39 weeks. I'm currently having weekly chiro appointments because my pelvis was still bad after having Eden, its only just come good now (and now my back is stuffed )

You will get heaps of sympathy from me, and if you lived in the same area, I would soooo be on your doorstep demanding you let me help you!!!

[black_rose]

Your pg sounds just like my last one, I put out my s joint and was on crutches and I almost needed a wheel chair. I later developed GD too.

I found the brace was great if I needed to walk but yes it made it worse if I wasn't moving to much. I used an ice pack first thing in the morning and a heat pack at night. Coles online was my best friend and I was lucky as dh also worked from home.

I found a physio who specialized in pregnant women and treating spd, he wasn't able to re align the joint but he could ease the pain significantly. He also diagnosed sciatica as a side consequence of having to walk differently and he could treat it for me. In the end I didn't need the crutches but I couldn't walk very far or lift dd1. She would have to climb onto me when I was sitting, that was the hardest part, not being able to pick her up.

I hope you can get some relief as I know how painful it is.

[belfie]

I found a physio who specialized in pregnant women and treating spd, he wasn't able to re align the joint but he could ease the pain significantly.

Can you PM or post the physio details? I'm eastern suburbs of Melb if he's anywhere near?

[black_rose]

He is in Ringwood North, it's Norwood physiotherapy, and it's Vincent who treated me along with a lady who was really good to, will pm you their number.

[Arimeh]

I found a physio who specialized in pregnant women and treating spd, he wasn't able to re align the joint but he could ease the pain significantly. He also diagnosed sciatica as a side consequence of having to walk differently and he could treat it for me. In the end I didn't need the crutches but I couldn't walk very far or lift dd1. She would have to climb onto me when I was sitting, that was the hardest part, not being able to pick her up.

Thats what my physio did. She said she could realign the joint, but it wouldn't hold because of the relaxin. So she just worked on the side effects - sciatica being one of the WORST ones!! Argghh I hated lying there in bed with the pain shooting down my leg.. awful awful stuff.

[Traveller]

I had two toddlers when I was pregnant with the twins and TBH I just ignored the housework, or asked friends to help when they were visiting. Things like picking up toys off the floor can be done just once a day, cleaning the toilet is possible with pelvic pain (at least it was for me) but cleaning the bath was not to I left that to OH. I did all the dishes in the sink rather than use a low down dishwasher, but if you do that remember to sway from one foot to the other rather than put all your weight down one side.

Honestly it is awful to live in a messy house, but it is much worse if you put your pelvis out even more. There were times I needed a wheelchair and trust me, that is not fun. So take any help you are offered and try not to put yourself under too much pressure.

[belfie]

He is in Ringwood North, it's Norwood physiotherapy, and it's Vincent who treated me along with a lady who was really good to, will pm you their number.

black_rose -thanks for that. But tehehe had to laugh, my physio who diagnosed me actually works out of Norwood physio it's a small world huh! I rang her today and she said yes I don't do treatment but try Marie Knight there. So i'm trying her on Monday. Also spoke to my osteo today who is more than happy for me to try both and to do whatever it takes to get me (hopefully) in better shape. And then after treatment she put my sock and shoe (on my bad leg) back on for me... lol... then I spent 5 mins trying to stand . She also wants me wearing the brace 24/7 to see if that helps. Thanks for sharing your experience, I appreciate the "company" even if I wish you didn't all have to suffer it as well. As for GD, well test is in week and a half, and I'm gonna try the pool in the interim to keep moving.

Traveller - I wish I could do dishes but something about the height of our bench (high) and my height (shorty) just doesn't work at all - my gluts start cramping up and before long I can't wash cos I'm too busy hanging onto it. Plus shifting side to side just locks my right side like nothing else.

I think I'm not quite "standard" (maybe there's no such thing) in that my pain/problem is very right-sided. Some of the classic PI stuff I don't have trouble with (i.e. knees apart actually doesn't bother me THAT much), and my osteo said today she thinks it's part PI part bogus hip (technical term ). Anyway, I've found some help - my mum (bless her!) is flying over from Tas for a week to help out so I'm feeling the love.

Arimeh's Eden - aaww thank you, I felt the love from your post (and most of my fam are in tassie tehe)

Did you ever worry you weren't safe IYKWIM? I was trying to shower monday morning (prior to last day at work) and I was worried I would slip as I was only upright with the help of the walls. I also worry that on those brief occasions that I HAVE to lift DS (i.e. into the car) that i'm gonna fall or something... how do I catch myself with arms full of toddler?

[black_rose]

Wow really is a small world huh. Marie!!! That's who I saw too, when Vincent went away she will be able to help.

[black_rose]

My pain was all in the right side too, although once they treated it I noticed my left was playing up but I hadn't felt it until then. Just take it very slowly, see if you can get your LO to help climb into the car, use the couch instead of the change table.

That's great that your mum is coming to help.