You know you're a parent when...

[OceanPrincess]

I was driving to the shops the other day and did something silly that made me laugh a bit at myself and think "Yep, only another parent would understand..!" I got thinking and thought I'd share for a bit of a laugh...

You know you're a parent when:

- You're in the car and see a bus (/truck/horse/cow/digger/tracktor) and exclaim in a loud excited voice "BUS!" (truck/horse...) only to remember that you've left the kids with the ILs

- You realise you've spent more on designer nappies than designer lingerie

- You know the 5 Steps to Bedtime pretty much inside and out

- You have more baby feeding spoons in your drawer than tea spoons

- You take more pleasure out of choosing your child's outfit than your own

- You have a mild aversion to slobbery dog kisses but look forward to those gorgeous slobbery toddler kisses

- You can't remember the last time you had more than 5 hours sleep in one block but the kisses mentioned above more than make up for it

- You've grown so used to drinking cold tea/coffee that if someone makes you a hot one you actually have to leave it for a good hour before you can drink it

- You can't remember the last time you got through the day with your clothes untouched by vomit, pee, dribble or some sort of sticky food substance

- There is no chocolate/biscuits/sweets of any kind visible in your pantry - but you have a mega stash hidden somewhere sneaky like the oven or inside the (broken) dishwasher

- You buy some fish and name them Giggle and Hoot

- Your TV spends more time on ABC2 than all the other channels combined


What else makes you a parent?? Add your own!

[Jennie13]

Cant think of any right now, but these really did make me laugh! (on an otherwise horrible day!)

I have to say i cant relate to most! thanks for the laugh

[Little Chicken]

You know every characters name on In The Night Garden, plus thier theme tunes, and can sing along without missing a beat.

Your nose can pick the whiff of a pooey nappy from 50 metres away, whereas thier father can't seem to smell it even when the nappy is literally under their nose.

The song playing over and over in your head is more likely to a wiggles song then anything in the current top 40.

Your ipod has more wiggles songs and nursery rhymes on it then anything you like.

You class a sleep in as getting up after 6am

[AndiE]

You hear yourself sounding like your mother: "You're older than your brother, you're old enough to know better!!"

[appletree]

You know you're a parent when:

- You can laugh about having to walk through a busy shopping centre back to your car after your toddler vomits brown sludge down the front of you after her aunty has fed her a box of maltesers while they were at the movies!

- Cleaning poo out of your bath only slightly horrifies you...

- Essential to your lounge room is mountain after mountain of toys

- You can't remember if you brushed your hair today, it kind of looks alright?

[*TripleJ*]

when u tiptoe around quietly and then realise DS is at daycare not sleeping

[shellbell3]

Lol so true all these! I repeatedly am heating my tea/ coffee in the microwave!

[Little Chicken]

Your handbag that once contained expensive lipsticks, perfume etc, is now more likely to contain nappies, wipes, squashed snacks, and leaking drinks

[helle]

You take your recently fed, sleeping baby out to the car and upon putting them in their seat, realise you still have your boob hanging out.

[Beach Mama]

You only buy clothes that look ok with snot/tears/spew/food smeared on them (paisley and floral work best I find)

[Little Chicken]

No outfit you own is complete without a smear of food, spew, or poo, depending on the colour

You do the mummy sway in the checkout queue wondering why everyone is looking at you weird then you realise the kids are at home.

The next person who says how nice it must be to stay home and do nothing all day will get a large and oddly shaped toy stuck somewhere painful.

[*TripleJ*]

You take your recently fed, sleeping baby out to the car and upon putting them in their seat, realise you still have your boob hanging out.

wat handbag? pmsl
toys are constantly everywhere even 5 seconds after u pick them all up

[helle]

You only buy clothes that look ok with snot/tears/spew/food smeared on them (paisley and floral work best I find)

And clothes that conceal maternity bra snaps, straps etc

[Frangipani]

OceanPrincess...I was agreeing with ALL your points .
Muminalice....I find myself singing and even dancing along to wiggles songs all the time...even when DS1 is not around .
Appletree...I was going to say the same about hair...my problem is actually remembering/finding time to brush my hair (and I've got long thick hair too)...most days I get around to it just before bed

I find myself singing the 'just keep swimming' line from Finding Nemo in any variation it can be used...I remember doing it at work once...we were looking for something on a customers statement and I sang 'just keep looking, just keep looking', then once I'd realised I was doing it the customer says to me...you got children hey

There is probably more I do...will keep tabs on myself and get back to you's. Great thread

[Frangipani]

Oh...I remember one....you find you are rocking the shopping trolley...even though there is no baby or child in it

[kirsty_lee]

You know your a parent when:

Your at someone elses house and have to remind yourself to shut the toilet door lol

[NaeNae]

when,

you walk around a supermarket exclaiming loudly and excitedly "ohhhhh milk nom nom nom" ........ "yes, doggy on the tin"
you survey shops quickly to determine if they are pram friendly
park as far away as you can from a main entrance so you have PLENTY of room to get a screaming baby in/out of the car without worrying about knocking the paint off another vehicle
you never eat a full meal by yourself..... little fingers helping themselves to your plate

[Little Chicken]

you know when your kids are playing noisily everything is ok, it's when they go quiet you know you have to run