IVF counselling

[RhiChiChi]

DH & I decided to book in and do the finance counselling, testing & IVF counselling to gain a better understanding of the procedure for IVF etc.... We, well I had decided I didn't want to do IVF a few months ago but then a gf spoke to me about her experience & it got me thinking again.
Anyway, we are going through Monash Clayton and I wanted peoples thoughts on the IVF counselling. TBH I was really disappointed with it & wondered if I was expecting too much? I thought they'd delve more into the emotional side of it, but they sort of just talked about stress & possible emotions that may come up during various scenarios etc.... and that was about it. I also was a little annoyed that a pg counsellor was taking the session.

[Saffy]

you can tell its just a legal requirement and that they are just going through the motions.......I've had to do it twice cos i swapped clinics. Its just 'nothing', not good or bad, for true counselling i guess we would have to go to a proper preofessional!
I agree wth everything you said and thought it would be better too.
Good luck for when you go ahead with ivf xx

[Lenny]

Hm, sounds like poor form that a pg counsellor took your session.
Mine was pretty good. Talked about how men and women are different (yeah, I know, but it was still worth discussing). Talked about attachment to embryos (some people seeing them as 'possible babies', and some seeing them as just a few cells). Talked about death - of one or both of us. Talked about miscarriage. It was quite thorough.
I did it through MIVF in Dandenong.

[Lily Dust]

We didnt go through your clinic but I was a bit disappointed in the initial session, thought there wasnt much to it (perhaps cause they all thought it would work 1st go, sure proved them wrong) but that all said, when it all got too much and breakdown point happened, I could not fault that service. The counsellor was empathetic, understanding and full of knowledge. I guess to start with they just tell you the very basics of what is there and that they are there. I am sorry though that the clinic wasnt as accomodating and 'caring' as you had hoped

[RhiChiChi]

Thanks for all your replies.

I guess I would have thought they would have more of an idea of why we were there ie: she said, 'so you're looking at starting a family?'. My DH said 'no, we already have a DD'..... so, I felt like Saffy said, it was just a legal requirement. I felt I got alot more out of doing the counselling when we did IUI - the counsellor seemed more genuine and she knew our history of m/c, ttc etc....

Lenny, they did go through most of what you said (how men and women are different, attachment to embryos, skimmed over the death part- of one or both of us) but she was showing us the flip chart and not really delving much more into things. I really needed to talk to someone about the m/c side and what if we don't have success? She touched on this but it felt so rehearsed, I wonder what the point of it was?

Lily, the counsellor did say they were there if we needed to talk to them at anytime, so perhaps they don't get in your face too much at the start if there is no point?

Thanks again, I guess I am worried that we will still be in the same situation as we are now.

[Lily Dust]

I really needed to talk to someone about the m/c side and what if we don't have success?
Lily, the counsellor did say they were there if we needed to talk to them at anytime, so perhaps they don't get in your face too much at the start if there is no point?

Thanks again, I guess I am worried that we will still be in the same situation as we are now.

I know the first question wasnt meant for me and I hope you dont mind me butting in but I think it kinda relates to the question you have asked me too. I spose that perhaps IVF clinics have so many patients these days that they dont feel they 'can waste' valuable resources like this. Even though I am fully aware it is certainly not a waste!!! Its just that like you said why bother if it doesnt get to that stage iykwim?? I am so sorry as I know that has come off rude and uncaring but i just cant get the wording right! ARRRRGGGHH.

It is such a scary though to think that this wont work for you. All the what ifs are just plain terrifying. I am so sorry that this is happening and I hope that this journey startes a new level really soon, hun

[RhiChiChi]

Hi Lily, no I understand what you meant and I guess I already know this, so shouldn't be too surprised by it. I guess
My anxiety has returned and is heightened at the thought of doing IVF (IUI was difficult at times). I am trying to manage my anxiety and hopefully that will stop the negative thoughts. Thanks again for replying, I really appreciate it.

[Gecko]

Hi RCC, i found it interesting to read as it made me realise that whilst my Clinic has this service, which seems to be compulsory, it was only mentioned to me that it is available if i wanted to - but they did not "make me see" anyone before we started with my first cycle... very strange...
apart from that - the reason i am posting is - i wanted to ask you if you have ever tried Yoga ? i have never been into it or thought it would ever be something i would enjoy... but since i started i would not miss it in the world, it does something to me/for me i can not describe...but most of all it kept me sane throughout my journey ...helps me hit that "re-set button" ...
hope it was only the initial hurdle for you - i come to realise that there is always something we have to overcome in the TCC world ...so lets hope it it smooth sailing from here for you ( for a change ) xoxoxo

[RhiChiChi]

Hi Gecko,

Thanks so much for popping in & posting. I've been stalking your blogs every now & then... which reminds me I have to catch up there again!

Yep, being doing Yoga for over 2 years now - I only go once a week and it has really helped with my anxiety and overanalysing etc....with all aspects of my life. I actually went last night & I felt really good whilst there but I have just had another pg announcement today and feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders.... Anyway, I know this feeling will pass & I have just gone back to a Naturopath for getting my cycles more regular in readiness for IVF, so will speak to him about getting something to control my anxiety. I also have some Bach Flower essences which I will use again as well as crystals (gosh I sound like a freak!). I might consider ramping up my Yoga classes by another session.

Thanks again for the positive perspective, I really needed it.
x

[Gecko]

haha it takes a "freak" to know a "freak" so not to worry i think we all have our potions and crystals who cares what ever keeps us going and gets us through xoxo i am glad you have Yoga available to you, and that you enjoy it,- it is worth gold ! and if you have the chance to increase it even better !

I am glad my post had a positive affect on you RCC xox

[Miss.B]

Hey hun, good luck with it all! We went through Monash Clayton and TBH the councelling was OK. I didn't really know what to expect as my head was still spinning that we HAD to do IVf.....but one thing that I took from it was that men and women handle the emotions associated with IVF differently and it's really important to support each other as much as possible.

PS You are def. not a freak with your essences and crystals, I love all that stuff

[RhiChiChi]

Miss B, I think that is the issue I have, the fact that I feel we have no option now but to do IVF. So glad to know that there are people on here that 'get it'. Thanks again everyone, I am feeling a bit better now. xx

[Porsche]

Big hugs Rhichichi!