We co sleep (technically bed share I think??) with DD. I have tried on and off to get her to sleep in her own room but we both gravitate back to each other no matter how hard I try. DP works away and that doesn't help either.
She will be close to three when the new baby arrives and I honestly don't see me forcing her if she isn't ready, or doing things any differently with this baby. She started in a bassinet then moved to our bed once she was too big.
So I was hoping for some advice from those who have been there done that? How did you make sure everyone was sleeping safely? How did the older child cope with a new bed mate? How did your partner cope with another bed mate? Did it work???
Thank you! I have months and months to stress about this lol
we are starting dd in her own room gradually, before bellyfruit arrives.
If she comes in during the night then shes in a sidecar cot if bellyfruit is in with us, or in our bed if bellyfruit is in the bassinet.
My DD was full time bed sharing when i first got pregnant. We then added a sidecar cot and after about 3 months dd slept mainly on the cot surface. at 6 months, dd moved in to her own bed in her own room. it was a gradual process and kind of a natural progression, and i glad that dd was ready at this time. dd still visits occassionally but is majority in her bed.
we have a hammock for ds and he also sleeps with us. when ds was born, dd often wanted to beat him up and so bedsharing with both of them would have been extremely difficult , and just not practical - i co-sleep to get more sleep and with both of them i would have to be on guard all night as well as all day. the 'beating up' has eased, and doesn't always happen but is also not that rare as i have discovered.
on the times where we have both kids in the bed, i spoon ds and have dd on my other side. (ds, me, dd, dh) and then dh is on other side (if he not on night shift) Getting dh used to settling dd (and dd used to accepting dh) during the pregnancy was so beneficial because sometimes i just can't do both kids at the same time
With my DD1 I had already transitioned her to her own bed but in our room by the time I was pregnant (she was 2) so that could be an option if the room is large enough? When DD2 was a week old we moved house and DD1 was put into her own room (she was almost 3) because I didn't want the newborns sleep disturbing hers as she had just started sleeping through. She was completely fine with the transition and even excited, she is still breastfed to sleep so I always go lay with her in her bed as she falls asleep. Occasionally she will wake and come into our room (maybe twice a month if that), if this happens I make sure I am in between DD1 and DD2 as DD1 can like to overlay me and wouldn't want her doing that to DD2! Usually though, she wakes up and then asks me or DP to come back into her room to lay with her till she is back asleep.
I wouldn't stress TOO much just yet. This is a little different but I know I was freaking out about the feeding to sleep as DD1 was still waking overnight for feeds when I got pregnant and I had no idea how I would co-ordinate both but by the end of pregnancy she was sleeping through (2yrs 8months or something) so it all worked out. I was happy for her to be in her own room once she was sleeping through and she seems to have adjusted no problems to that.
I put a cot next to my bed with the side down, newborn was in there, I slept right next to him, DD (2 at the time) in the middle DH on the other side. DD was then sleeping in her own bed until about 10pm when she would come into our bed for the rest of the night. Worked great, did it for about 12 months. Best thing in the world all 4 of us waking up together. I miss it!
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Advice - Co sleeping with Newborn and Toddler
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