how can i cope with the stresses!!!!

[1stimer]

any of you ladies know how i can help my partner out, this last week im not sure why but he has been really snappy and stressing out, but mainly at me.

i have enough worries to deal with (like hello im the one that will be pushing him out of my little whole)

i dont give him attitude when he is like this or start any fights but i still cop it all, and its not untill he makes me cry (probably all the hormones) is when he apologises to me for it.

i know it has to be hard for him especially with us going to have to rely only on his salary and we are still looking for a new place and everything, but i have already taken over the house looking and i dont ask him to do anything around the house, i do it all, i go to all the classes, atm im paying all the bills with the money im getting from still working.

i just dont know what else i can do, and i need to do something, because i need to not be to stressed out for the next 3 weeks......


any ideas???? (if you can understand my ramble)

[Lulu]

Might take a little chat with him. Remind him you are partners, you are supposed to be standing BESIDE each other to face adversity, not one blaming the other whilst the other is trying to hold it all together....

This is what partnership is about and getting through the tough times are what makes you stronger together.

[KimB]

Maybe he is stressing too as the birth gets closer. Has he actually gone to any of the classes with you so that he knows what to expect???

Sit down and talk to him about how he is making you feel. Explain that yes you guys will be on one wage but then so are many other people.

Ask him to help you around the house as when the baby comes you will not have time to do it all. Believe me babies take up more time than people realise.

Ask him to start paying some of the bills so that he has an idea of how much it costs for you guys to live. Many men don't have any idea at all because we women do it and then they get a real shock when they have to.

Mostly tell him that you love him and understand that he is a bit afraid as well. Going from a couple to a family is a big step but that you wouldn't want anyone else there with you.

hope this helps

Kim

[SunnyRain]

I think he's probably feeling a complete disconnect with what's happening. Unfortunately, a side effect of you taking care of everything means that he's been left out of the loop.

My husband has been very much involved in our pregnancy but he's copped some crap from people (actually more from women than men) who seem to think there's something weird about how involved he is. They sort of tease him about it. There are some strange perceptions out there, it can be really hard on a man to know what he's supposed to think, feel and do during pregnancy.

There's a chapter in one of my books 'Conception, Pregnancy & Birth' by Miriam Stoppard that's written for men. It's really well written and my husband really enjoyed reading it. He felt much more connected after he read it. Perhaps you could take a trip to the library and borrow the book for your husband to read that chapter. He might end up reading the whole book and then he'll know a bit more about what's going on.

I'm really worried that my husband will not be able to cope when he is the only bread winner in our family for a while. We've always contributed equally to everything and we've talked about it a lot, but I'm just so scared that it will be too stressful for him. I don't want to put that burden on him and I don't want him to feel like a slave to his job.

[Gecko]

Could it be that he is just worried because your due date is so close and he somewhat is worried about being the main bacon provider, that would freak me out a bit ... hang in their Hun ! i am sure he will be over the moon once he is holding the bundle of joy,- nothing else will matter ...