2 under 2 - how do you do it?

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born?

2. Did you get out and about straight away?

3. Did you have set routines?

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2?

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2?

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react?

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do?

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional?

9. When do you clean?

10. When/How do you cook?


Ok so at the moment i feel i am doing quite well but i think if we all share our experiences we can arm ourselves with some extra knowledge and things to try we may never have thought of... i know i'm not perfect (close to but not quite ) and would love to hear how everyone else copes!

Please let me know if there are any other questions and i can add them to the list, i am going to answer my own questions aswell.... lol come on everyone..

let's see how all you SUPER MUMS do it

[BrightSparkles]

Will be watching this very closely

[Tinks]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born? 18mths

2. Did you get out and about straight away? Yes, I had no choice, things needed to be done.

3. Did you have set routines? Not straight away, the routines happened over time. After a while I found I was running on 'auto pilot'.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? I was happy to have them close together. I figured that if they were close in age they'd be going through similar stages at the same time and start school a year apart which would make it easier for me to get back into the workforce and study.

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? Initially he loved her but did get a little jealous at times.

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? Feeding was hard. DS would do naughty things for my attention as soon as I sat down to feed DD. I was constantly interupting her feeds to tend to him. In the end I found that if I put him in his high chair next to us with his snack or lunch (depending on the time of day) it kept him occupied and I could interract with both. He also liked me to cuddle him while I fed so I ended up with 2 on my lap at times as well.

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? I had no help, I was a single mum.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? All of the above!

9. When do you clean? I used to do most of the cleaning when they had their afternoon sleeps. Washing was usually done in the evenings when they were in bed. I still do that now lol.

10. When/How do you cook? I used to have tea ready by 5 because DS would eat what I ate. Tea time was always a hassle, one or both would need attention.

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

1.
2. Did you get out and about straight away? Yes, I had no choice, things needed to be done.

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? I had no help, I was a single mum.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? All of the above!

Everyone told me i was crazy to go out but your right Tinks things DO need to be done, everyone tells you NOT to do things but you never see them offering to help!

Sounds like you have done an AMAZING job as a single mum with 2 under 2... it's hard work and i have someone here to help me out . You seem to have such a positive attitude to it all and i hope it gives others hope to know we can all get through.

[Tinks]

Thanks ZF. Everyone said I was crazy too!

I never really thought about it at the time though, in the situation there was no one else to help so I had to do what I had to do. I was by no means a perfect parent but I am proud of myself. My kids are 12 and 11 (next week) now. How time flies!

They are both at the same stage hormonally atm which is a challenge for DH and myself. They fight like cat and dog but love eachother at times

TBH if someone asked me if I'd have 2 under 2 again my answer would be........YES!!! I only wish that I knew at the time that I'd have a 3rd so I could have htem all 18mths apart from eachother.

As much as it was mentally and physically exhausting at times, I really enjoy having them close in age.

You're going to be fine, you'll be challenged and exhausted at times but from what I see of you on here you're an awesome mum and you'll get through it brilliantly

[feeb]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born? 18 months old

2. Did you get out and about straight away? nope as had a cs and cant drive and idea of pram with 2 up and down front steps is NOT appealing currently

3. Did you have set routines? Just try and keep DS1 to his routine and DS2 work around where possible

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? excited, scared re how it would be with 2

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? Inquisitive wants to pick him up all the time, but jealous at times and has hit him a few times

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? BF tandem its hard work and full on as DS1 gets annoyed when he has to wake for DS2 to finished side 1

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? DH has now gone back to work so its harder now as he had been doing most things for DS1 as I am not ment to lift for 6 weeks

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? Tired ++++ as DS2 has been very windy/colic and unsettled at night and not sleeping. Happy to have 2 healthy boys, emotional also as tired and irritable

9. When do you clean? When I can find the time so far house is a mess!!! Just ensure that dishes etc are in dishwasher and trying to get on top of washing!!

10. When/How do you cook? To be honest I have only cooked once since I got home as DH has cooked or we have had takeaway but I do plan on using slow cooker LOTS and with any luck if I can get sleep at night and not need a nap when boys are alseep will cook when they are asleep in arvo and just re heat later.

[Turkish Delight]

I don't know how you guys do it.

Hats off to you guys.

[black_rose]

How old was #1 when #2 was born? 18 nomths

2. Did you get out and about straight away? No

3. Did you have set routines? Yes, its helps keeps the girls settled, they get very out of sorts when we change things, we aren't strict with the play activites just feeding, naps, bath and sleep routine. They can both be really hyper but they calm down once we start the bath and bed routine.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? Positive, but I had a hard time in the last trimester on bed rest almost all of it so I think it made me more determined to ger going

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? She was excited but a bit jealous too

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? BF, wouldn't take FF, DD1 was put out to start with but we gave her her own baby to play with and I would ask her to help by getting cloths etc.

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? Yes he would feed DD1 at dinner time and give her some one on one time before bathing her and he is the main one to put her to sleep.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? Happy but exhausted, it took a bit of getting DD2 into a routine as she had night colic.

9. When do you clean? When the girls sleep and now when DD1 is outside or at daycare twice a week, also have someone in to help twice a week as DH hates doing it he would rather pay someone.

10. When/How do you cook? Found a couple of great places nearby who have home style cooked food, manage to cook most nights now.


I have found I have to have a routine, its slipped a bit this week so the house is in a bit of chaos so I need to catch up, being tired with no 3 in the way is making it a bit harder at the moment! Will probably have 3 under 3 for a day or two if I have a third pre term labour! Crazy I know but we think this will be it. I am trying to make sure I stay organised and DD2 is going into daycare too so both of them have me to themselves for a day so we can go to their swimming lessons.

[ElleJay]

I don't know how you guys do it.

Hats off to you guys.

I agree!

[megs]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born? 16 months

2. Did you get out and about straight away? I kept DS1 in daycare one day a week, gave him a day of socialising and me one day with baby on his own. I still went for walks most days. I had a twin pram made life easier.

3. Did you have set routines? As my second child got to about 3 months the routine became more formal as he wasn't feeding quite as much. My biggist thing was making sure they both had their afternoon sleep at 1pm. I then had at least 11/2 hours to myself. Nighttime routine was they would both go in bath together, baby in baby seat. I would get baby out whilst DH stayed and washed eldest, I would then dress and breastfeed baby , whilst DH would dress, read book and put eldest to bed. That worked well in our house.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? I was fairly cool with it, I knew I would be busy, I'm not a person that stresses easily, or at least I hide it well. I did try to not plan too much for a day so if they had to change at last minute it wasn't to much of a pain,

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? He was quite good, I didn't have any tantrums, etc, only problem was he was in bubs face, and give him was really only a baby himself had to remind myself of that and not have too high expectations of him. They are best best friends now. Miss each other if they are not together, cuddle and kiss each other in the morning. And yes they do share a room. Have done since DS2 was 1 as eldest kept climbing in the cot to sleep with him, so figured easier to just put them in the one room

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? BF, he was fine, I would try and feed on the couch so if he wanted to sit next to me he could. Did the usual, set him up with food, had playschool on etc so he would be a bit distracted

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? DH a farmer, works long hours so was gone from 7.30am and didn't get home til about 6pm. He was biggest help with night routine, baths etc. Plus he would stay up later with bubs if he was unsettled so I could get some sleep before 1am feed

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? I must be honest first 6 months felt like a bit of a bluur, I was happy, tired, and emotional. The only time I really felt wasn't coping bub was about 4 months, DH was working from 6am to 10pm so I wasn't getting any help (in laws useless) and bubs started waking several times a night and was very unsettled (think he was getting hungry) that lasted about 3 weeks. I then started him on solids at 5 months and he started sleeping through. My sanity returned.

9. When do you clean? mmmm when I can.

10. When/How do you cook? Would generally start tea about 4.30pm. Think that is something I probably could have done better, we only had simple easy to cook meals, worked though, we all ate tea together and had home cooked meals. So we survived.

Good luck, you will have good and bad days, don't have high exectations and just enjoy it all. And it is really beautiful watching their friendships develop. I must say that has been the biggest gift for me.

Sorry that ended up being so long

[kawazuki]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born? 26 months, so a little over 2 but close enough

2. Did you get out and about straight away? yep had no choice we had a holliday booked so we had to go, 2000km drive round western nsw, was a great trip. but once back i wet out alone once again had no choice, groceries needed to be done, bills paid, visiting people etc etc, had to hand in paper work for work and get away from the 4 walls of my house, im a very social outside person

3. Did you have set routines? no not really, just go with the flow, i dont run by clocks when im not working so dont mind if we dont eat lunch till 1:30 or have it at 12

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? positive, said i can do this to myself alot and made sure i had support around me

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? it is HER baby if you ask her lol, she loves her and loves to help and uses marees clothes on her doll etc its great

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? breast feeding, tay was a bit unsure at first, and kept asking where marees bottle was etc, but now she points to my boobs and says baby have dinner lol

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? very helpful when not working, changes nappies burps her afetr feeding gets dinner sorted etc

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? great, feel amazing very happy at peace really and very proud im able to do what i do

9. When do you clean? inbetween feeds, i do a bit here and there, pick up things as i walk past etc, vacum 2nd daily while maree has her big sleep and set tay up with the wiggles for half hour so i can whip around, washing gets done as it piles up

10. When/How do you cook? slow cooker is my friend, pop it on in teh morning leave it be also i find quick meals, or meals i can make in stages between feeds. have bub in rocker or sling and off i go, taylah likes to help so no issue there and she is in day care as well so i find i cook more when se is at school so msake 2 days meals in one day

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born?
Ava is 15mths

2. Did you get out and about straight away?
Pretty much, i figured it was harder to keep Ava occupied than Zara and all Zara does is eat and sleep.... we went to the shopping centre for a quick trip 2 days after coming home and then the w/end just gone i took them to a 6th birthday @ a play centre
It all worked out though Zara slept the whole time and Ava ran around and played with her cousins, my SIL took it in turns watching either one of the kids.

3. Did you have set routines?
At the start i was waking DD2 every 3hrs for feeds which seemed to work around DD1 but now i am just letting her go, seems to be every 3-4hrs.
I am bathing them @ the same time, DD1 in the big bath and DD2 in the baby bath.
DD1 eats roughly the same time every day so we are working around DD2's feeds with that but so far have ALMOST managed to not cross over yet.
Bed times i find difficult at times as DD1 can sometimes hear DD2 sooking while i try and settle her for a nap and she wants to see the baby.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2?
Everyone said oh the 2nd will be hard, it's hard work etc etc and my SIL even went as far to say she hope we had a PITA as her 2nd made life difficult for them.
In my own head space i decided what will be will be, if i am calm they will be calm (not always the way though).

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2?
Very intrigued, doesn't seem too jealous yet but very inquisitive, likes to come give her kisses now but can get a little pushy if she doesn't want to be near her (doesn't know her own strength)

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react?
BF so far and am LOVING it, feed times are roughly working well although she seems to play up a bit at night.
DD1 likes to watch and i am hoping she doesn't wanna give it another try as she has GIANT teeth now... sometimes she can get a bit clingy as i am sitting with DD2 for so long while she plays on her own.

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do?
He's working 7 days a week at the moment but when he's home he tries to occupy DD1 and give her some time so i can get some things done.
He hasn't really done the cooking etc but i guess he's helping in his own way, he also likes bathing and having a shower with DD1 and will hold DD2 after a feed etc while i do things.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional?
So far AMAZING, never thought i could have this much energy with 2... every now and then i feel very emotional, just at small things.
I was never like this after DD1, TV shows etc make me wanna cry sometimes, things that would not normally have upset me make me feel sad.

9. When do you clean?
DD1's toys when she has a nap and then again at the end of the day
I vac while DD1 is awake, i vac around DD2's basinette whether she is asleep or not, dishes and dishwasher at night when both girls are asleep, washing all day every day... gotta figure out when to MOP... hmm

10. When/How do you cook?
So far i just cook just before dinner time but am thinking will start doing bulk meals and freezing for those OFF days etc.

[PinkPalace]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born?
DD was 15 months when #2 ds Was born

2. Did you get out and about straight away?
Yep we were out to the shops when DS was a couple of days old.

3. Did you have set routines?
rough routines. Breakfast, playdate, DS down for a sleep, DD 1on1 with mum movie time, Ds wakes lunch, play inside , arvo tea outside and garden play, dinner, bath milk bed.


4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2?
We involved DD alot - setting up DS' room and got her a baby to hold, she was quote young and so i guess adapted well to the new baby. we kept it exciting and positive.

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2?
She was fine. I think because she was still young, she ditn hardly notice he was around (except when he screamed she wanted to go check on him). otherwise she was too emerged in the exciting things 1 year olds find to explore

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react?
I BF #1 to 7 months so she didnt know BF when DS was born. She would BF her baby (never asked me for a feed) and would often lift her shirt to DS when he cried

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do?
Yep DH and i were on par with each other - you need to be. We would alternate tasks around the home and with the kids. (ie who ever did dinner cleaned whil ethe other did the baths). DH would get up to #1 in the night and i would do #2. it was a judgement call before bub was born we could care for one each through the night.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional?
The first 6 months were exhausting, DS was colic and reflux and i was feeding all night long. But it is so worth it now. DD is 2.5 and DS is approaching 18 months, they have their own secret langauge and you often catch them giggling to each other and you have no idea why. They do fight but DD is very tolerate which is great.

9. When do you clean?
Often i find ironing is best straight after bekky when the kids are happy and fed and can entertain themselves for 45mins. (however at the start i would do it at night after bedtime).
Often cleaning will happen when DS is asleep or when DH is home (and i am not at work)

10. When/How do you cook?
I sill cook every day /2nd day. i try to make enough for leftovers for the next day.
I do most cooking with DS is asleep - as DD loves her quiet movie time (as she doesnt day sleep) and this gives me 2hrs to sort meals out for the evening.

[AndiE]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born? DS1 was a few days shy of 21 months.

2. Did you get out and about straight away? Think I took both boys out when DS2 was approx one week old. Fortunately I had my parents with me to amuse DS1 while I BFd DS2!

3. Did you have set routines? With DS1, yes in terms of having a daily nap and lunch. The rest of the day I try to amuse him or set him up to amuse himself! The day tends to fall into place. The wiggles and Chuggington do come in handy and DS1 is also in daycare two days a week.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? I swung between "Oh dear God ... what have I done" and "Nah, it'll be a piece of cake".

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? Fascinated and constantly wants to watch bub, touch bub and kiss bub. Oh, and steal DS2's dummy! No jealousy (as yet).

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? I am BFing DS2 and it can be tricky because DS1 often wants to be right up close to us to watch bub - sometimes too close, as I've found I/we need a little bit of space to BF. Again, I try to set DS1 up to amuse himself (he loves to sweep, so I'll give him the broom and it will amuse him for ages ... hopes he's like that when he's 15!)

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? Yep, I'm very lucky as I've got a DH who pitches in 110% with home life when not at work.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? Mostly ok, but sometimes a little tired, mainly due to keeping up with DS1 (DS2 sleeps through the nite, so I can't blame night feeds!). Sometimes I get crotchety if DS1 does the usual toddler thing and get into everything , but I generally don't lose the plot.

9. When do you clean? When DS1 is at daycare/asleep BUT, if I vaccum when he's around (he also loves to vaccum and wants the vacuum cleaner whenever it's out), I tell him he can have it when I'm finished. Then I'll let him "vaccum" for 10 mins or so.

10. When/How do you cook? Pretty much as usual - I just try to start getting organised a little earlier than I did "before DS2".

Good luck, having 2 under 2 has its challenges, but I'm very, VERY lucky that I've got a settled, content baby and a reasonably happy, placid toddler.

[Lolli]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born? 21 months.

2. Did you get out and about straight away? Erm, we came home from the hossy after five hours, then I didn't get out for five days. I babymooned. It was lovely. Since dh went back to work after one month, we get out and about every day (once a week that might just be a walk to the duck pond with a friend, but it's still out and about )

3. Did you have set routines? Kind of. The first month was up in the air coz of dh being home, but after that things settled down. we have a very flexible daily routine.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2? i'll be honest- scared ****less. But it is much easier than I thought it would be.

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2? He didn't reakky pay her much attention at all, tbh. The jealousy kicked in a bit at about the three month mark (coincidentally, when she started rolling over )

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react? BF. So, so easy- I can't recommend i highly enough Ds did try too latch on at one stage there when dd wasabout 2 weeks old and had just finished a feed and i had my bb hanging out. I went "Uh, no, that's for babies". he giggled and ran off

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do? Ummm... dh is not domestically inclined. But he did get up with ds every morning so i could sleep in with dd, and he kept ds entertained all day, every day (for the first month).

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional? very happy- I was on top of the world. but also very emotional, especially about ds. I remember thinking he had been my best mate, we did everything together, and how sad he must be that he had to share mummy. I wasn't as tired with two as I was with just ds- but so far dd is a totally different kind of sleeper **Frantically touches wood**

9. When do you clean? Sporadically I do a house clean after the kids go to bed- pick up toys, put on washing, fold washing, clean up kitchen and wash up. Anything on top of that gets done when it gets done.

10. When/How do you cook? Even more sporadically i hate cooking. i try to do what i can early in the day, so there is less to do at dinnertime, bring on winter and the slowcooker! The first two months we subsisted on frozen meals that I'd cooked when i was pg, frozen lasagnas and pastabakes, and take away pizza.

[Ellie]

Thanks for sharing ladies...you are all amazing...mine will be 14 months apart so I'm reading with great interest!

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

Your all doing an amazing job... i wish i could print this out and show everyone that i am not odd for having energy and being able to get out of the house with 2 little ones... lol

I am glad to see there are people taking a look that are GOING to have 2 under 2, i hope we can be of some help to you guys.
Are there any other questions anyone would like added to the list, anything that might help you in the future?

Keep the responses coming, i am enjoying having a read!

I keep getting the supermum comment too but have said the same as most of you... you adapt to the situation your in, i have more energy than i ever did with DD1 (benefits of teething toddlers i think )

[MrsFabuloso]

1. How old was #1 when #2 was born?

16mths

2. Did you get out and about straight away?

No I still don't often go out with the kids on my own. It scares me to think I might lose one of the. My children are runners and have no problem with being far away from me!

3. Did you have set routines?

Dinner/bath/bed time routine for DD was important in the early days. I tried to keep that routine all the time to try to maitain the 'normalcy' of the day for her a bit! And also because bed time was the only definate time I sat with her and her alone to read a few books and be with her alone. Same as having a bath with her occaisionally if DH was home to be with DS. I would jump in the bath and just be with her.

4. What was your lead up attitude to 2 under 2?

I was petrified! DS was an unexpected pg, so I was surprised. Although we did plan to have another, we didn't plan on it quite so soon after having DD!

5. How did your 1st react to bub #2?

She dotes on him, he adores her. When he was little we had a few times wehre she was a bit too rough, but she learnt pretty quickly what she could or couldn't do with him. Now they're best buddies. I love watching their relationship grow. They still have their times when they encroach on each others space, but what siblings don't?!!

6. Did you BF or FF and how did you find either and how did #1 react?

I am bfing. DD was great with it. She actaully started to want booboo again too. But she had no idea how to attach and actually suckle, but I would let her cuddle up to me/us and have a go. She stopped it after a while. She would often just sit next to me and stroke his head, so sweet!

7. Did your partner help a lot and what did he/she do?

YES!! He was sooo good. He would help cook before he went to work, let me sleep when he could, got up to DD through the night if he wasn't working the next day (and sometimes even if he was).He'd bath the kids when he could, dress them, tend to them, help me tidy up. He still does. I would have gone nuts if he hadn't helped me.

8. How do/did YOU feel? tired, happy, emotional?

All of the above! In the early days it was really tough. Both of the kids didn't sleep well, heck they still don't some nights (last night I was up 4 times....or was it 5??). But now I have them, I wouldn't have it any other way. I love them being close in age. My brothers and I are 8and 9yrs apart, and I never really had a relationship with them. Because they're so claose in age, my kids will always be friends I think!

9. When do you clean?

Clean, what's that?? When DS was having 2-3 sleeps a day I would do bits then. DD could help with some stuff, or she was just happy to potter about in her own in the quiet! My house was never really 'clean', but it was managable. Now they sleep at the same time in the day, if I'm not working I clean then, if I'm working I do it at night while they're asleep. Or with things they can help with I do it with them.

10. When/How do you cook?

When DS was tiny, only when DH was around. I would make extra and plan it so I didn't have to cook without his help with the kids, or him cooking for us. Now the kids are older, they sometimes 'help'. I give them bits of raw carrot/frozen peas/corn....and a bowl and spoon/fork. DD loves this. DS is not as interested yet though. But he will play for a while on his own now, so I can get a quick meal doen without too much fuss usually. Or I give them playdough/drawing to keep them occupied for a while til I am finished.


Things do get sooo much easier as bub gets older. Now DS is 18mths old, it's plain sailing for me. I can do most things without too much fuss. When he was little, until he was about 10ish-mths, I really struggled to be honest. But now its all good!