ok my nearly 3 year old is driving me crazy....some days are fine and other days i feel like i am constantly saying no don't do that, get down, come here etc etc she seems to just do silly things a lot eg this morning she went into the bathroom to do a wee and she came out with her shorts dripping wet because she had put them down the toilet, despite getting into trouble only last night for putting her feet down the toilet ! when i tell/ask her to do something she answers NO !! and its always in such a rude tone, she is sent to her room and gets yelled at (ehich i hate to do) but it doesnt seem to make any difference as she does something silly again a few minutes later, is it just a stage ? is it attention seeking ? and any tips for how to deal with her when she is naughty would be great ! we try and explain she shouldn't be rude and why she shouldn't touch the hot toaster for example and she seems to understand and then 5 seconds later touches it.
we also have a 11 month old boy which makes me wonder if it is attention seeking as he has been a very difficult baby but we haven't had any problems at all with her being jealous up until now, i really try and catch her when she does something good but on days like today thats very hard to do, any advice is appreciated
It is a stage. Basically it is at this age that they are trying to differentiate themselves as an individual separate from you (they do this again when they hit teenage years - can you tell?!?). So that is why they test boundaries and dont listen or say no to everything you ask. The best thing to do is just understand that this will happen and it will pass. It is a good time to reassess your house rules and what is appropriate and what isn't. Throw away any rules that aren't logical or necessary (make your house as toddler safe as possible to reduce to amount of rules you need to enforce) and stick to the ones that are important (especially safety rules) making sure you give a clear reason for your decision (eg. one word - safety, dangerous, fragile etc.). Follow up with clear guidelines if they insist on breaking an important rule but make sure consequences are logical. For example if they are tipping water over the floor (a favourite one n our house) - "stop because it is slippery and dangerous. If you do it once more I will take the cup. OK I am taking the cup. *cuddles or comfort during the inevitable tantrum*. Mummy loves you but you can't tip water on the floor - it is dangerous". Lots of deep breaths. LOL. You will both get through it.
A great book for understanding the development is Robin Grilles Heart to heart parenting. Very useful!
Krysalyss, thanks for your response and advice, as i read your post i realised a lot of our problems come from a little chair and table set she has and she drags the chairs around everywhere enabling her to get into all sorts of mischief so taking those away might decrease the reasons we need to tell her to stop doing things !
We have the same issues in our house except instead of it being table and chairs it is toys with wheels..Jacob runs from one end of the house to other with them and it drives me nuts.. He is pretty good with the toilet but is continually tipping out the soap or spraying deodorants.. and even if we put them up high somehow he gets them..
It is so frustrating but I know it will pass.. Does your DD still have a day sleep? I know the very rare day Jacob does sleep he is heaps and heaps better.. He realy needs that sleep but simply refuses to..
Hi aussienic, no day sleep here anymore unfortunately, she is 3 this week and wow talk about pushing the boundaries ALL the time, we have had another bad day with her and we are having her birthday party tomorrow, i have threatened if she is naughty again i will ring everyone and cancel her party ! but she seems to go from one naughty thing to the next, we have started to say no you cant do things you like (as everything is i'll do it myself at the moment) and she hates it when she isn't allowed to do said thing herself so that might help bring back some control to us, here's hoping anyway !
Its just a hard age I think.. you can't reason with them and they don't get what they are doing wrong.. they look big enough to understand fully but they just don't get it..
My 3 yr old is getting heaps better.. around his 3rd birthday it was just horrendous but now almost 6 months later thikngs are getting good again.. Not every day.. today was a pretty good day except for the massive tantrum in the shop.. he needed to pee but instead of saying I need to pee he felt the need to scream the place down *sigh* Thankfuly I can now pick up thse signs so we just headed to the toilets and asked him if he needed to go when we got there
3 year old who doesn't do anything she is told !
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