Now, initially you think this is great. My son has never been sad. He's been angry, happy, excited, playful, sneaky... but never sad.
He is three years old. I cannot ever recall him being sad. If you stop him doing something or take a toy away, he gets angry. He has thrown the odd tantrum. But even his carers at Nursery agree that he isn't sad, he's angry instead.
Is this normal? Do I need to do something to help him? He can tell me other people feel sad, so he recognises it as an emotion, but he doesn't display it himself.
Maybe he thinks that overall life is pretty sweet so he doesn't need to feel sad kwim? I mean, most kids get pretty snakey when you take a toy away or they can't have something, but rarely will they get sad. They just don't seem to find themselves in the situation where they might actually feel sad. I can't ever recall a time when any of mine have been truly sad because they just haven't been exposed to any situations where they would truly feel sad. When my Nan died years ago, DS1 wasn't even 2 and DD1 was only 11wks old and DS was too young to understand. He knew I was sad, and gave me extra cuddles and kisses, but he didn't show it himself.
Anger is an extension of sadness. They say at the root of all anger is sadness.
Have his teachers said it's a concern?
Have you looked at the kids books about emotion? "When I feel..." I think they are called. It might be helpful for him to understand what sadness is and then he can let you know if he has felt it, even if he hasn't outwardly shown it or reacted to his own sadness iykwim?
Hmm.. I don't think you need to worry. Sadness isn't a very nice emotion and I don't think there's any harm in not feeling it just yet. I'm sure life will give him plenty of opportunity to find out what it feels like in the future, so I wouldn't worry. As you said, he knows what it looks like in others, so maybe he has felt it but not displayed it??
I suppose I'm worried not because Nursery is, but because the national curriculum DS is on (yes, from birth in the UK) says he should show sadness. And because he can easily recognise sadness in me and give me a cuddle to make me feel better (his words), I'm just concerned that he's blocking it off or not wanting to show it.
Having said that, I don't want him to be sad either!
It's a tough one. I'll have a chat with him about it, but he hasn't ever said anything about being sad when we've talked about it before or talked about it with books.
DS doesn't feel sad
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