Ok well Im not sure if it me or her(DD). Sorry if this seems disjointed but I am so sleepp deprived its getting ridiculous.
Today is our 3 week anniversary since DD had a good sleep ie only waking once a night and even that was only one night.
She has been waking between 3 and 5 times a night every night and has feeds each time she wakes, but she has also been eating less during the day too so would that be making a difference?
Also she has been teething since she was 3 months, but even then she slept through 3 times. Is the teething meant to affect night time for this long? Does it affect self-settling? I dont know what to do, I spoke to child health 2 weeks ago and they said they would refer me to sleep school if it didnt get better, is it time to call them again? She is back to wanting to suckle on me full time during the night, but wont take a dummy.
hun I really feel for you, there's nothing worse than sleep deprivation is there? I was in the same boat as you when DD was 5 months. It had been 6 weeks of her constantly waking every half hour or so through the night and I was a walking zombie. No one can really tell you when or if you need to seek outside help, I guess that's something only you can decide. For me I had got to the point where I just couldn't handle it anymore, I wasn't enjoying being a mummy because I was so exhausted. I had tried so many gentle parenting techniques, bought the no cry sleep solution and no cry nap solution but nothing was working. In the end we did go to sleep school and while it was one of the hardest things I have done, it did work for us. I'm not saying this is the way you should go, only you will know what's right for you guys, but I did want to lend a sympathetic ear and tell you I know how hard it is when your bubs won't sleep. Maybe before you make any decisions about sleep school you try to get your DD to eat more during the day? Maybe offer her the boob more during the day in the hope she wont need to eat as much at night. She's almost 6 months so you will probably start her on solids in a few weeks so fingers crossed things will improve then.
Good luck hun and I really hope things improve for you
Thank you for your reply Claire,
She has already started solids, and I dont know whether that would be making a difference either? I feel like maybe I shouldnt be offering her boob everytime she wakes in the night either but she just screams and screams untill i give in.
Thanks again*
My DS did the same thing around 5 months, sleeps just went to crap! Waking a million (well it felt like a million) times a night. The only thing that helped us was time. I think it is just babies realising there is a big world out there and they want to know all about it. I hope you find some answers soon!
There is a good change it's not teething! I thought my DS3 was teething at 4 months and he never got one till he was 11 months.
Solids could be doing it. Something you are giving her could be giving her a tummy ache. Have a look at what you are giving her and consider an elimination diet and see if it helps.
THe other thing that comes to mind is where she is at developmentally?
Is she rolling or trying to ATM?
If you can get your hands on a copy of The Wonder Weeks it will help you feel at ease about this sort of thing. They explain this kind of stuff so well. Babies have a "fussy phase" before a "developmental leap". I wish I'd known about this book when I had my first baby. Whenever we're having an episode I read it and it helps me to ride through it knowing that it's just what babies do
Thanks again Girls, Im at breaking point and the support makes a big difference.
Missymoo- we co-slept at the start up untill 2 months ago but the problem there is that she would literally stay on my boob all night suckling and wake up everytime I tried to roll over.
Raven- I havnt heard of that book but will definately look for it, and funny you should ask because she has just gone through a developmental growth spurt this week... which has given her a new voice and 'heavy metal scream' as DP calls it. She does roll over too, and I find when Im trying to get her to sleep she will be trying to roll over.
I have only been trying her on one type of food for 5 days to make sure there are no reactions, but maybe I should stop alltogether for a couple of days?
She has cut her third tooth, but still she slept through for the first time when she cut her first, so thats why Im so unsure of it being teeth too.
She just hates going to sleep! She just screamed in my face for half an hour, so I gave up, walked away, went back and got her up and now shes on her play mat being cheeky. I always put her down when she shows tired signs. So frustrating.
I have found that sleep school only worked once mine were eating three meals a day, that way I knew they could sleep all night. And it did work. With DD1 she didnt' sleep more than 1.5 hours day OR night for 8 MONTHS!! So when sleep school worked on night one (and it was fine, I went in and out every few minutes for two hours, and the job was done). I actually felt terrible I'd let her go that long because the lack of sleep had also effected her. So for me it was definitely a win win.
DS is currently not sleeping long at all during the night, but Im not going to do anything about it until he's on solids. Prob in about 5 weeks. Until then I have to continue being zombie. I just found with DD2 she wouldn't really sleep through until she'd been on solids. I tried with her earlier (gentle CC , just patted her and taught her to self settle) but it didnt' happen until she was about 6 months.
With DS he self settles which is great, but has never slept through...yet!!
Good luck, it is just awful being so sleep deprived. xo
Peach it is so hard when you don't get any sleep! I was considering sleep school too recently, as we have had a shocking run here. There have been flus/colds etc on and off here for MONTHS and I was feeling rather desperate. Also our 3 yo has never slept well - she got lots of ear infections between 9-18 months and they seemed to cause her no end of pain at night she also suffered quite badly when teething - all fine during the day but awful at night. As a consequence of this and missing a few ear infections early on I will go to the Doc if there are long periods of unrest at night with no obvious cause - JIC. This may seem OTT but I have been caught out before and felt so bad. Also a cold can cause pain in the ear when bubs lies down at night - no infection necessary just the pressure in the tube.
A had heaps of sleep issues when I introduced solids at 6 months - she must have had shocking stomach pains as once I stopped the solids she settled. Having said that I restarted a few days later but was very careful not to give her massive serves and was quite strict about timing - so made sure she had time between food/milk. I wonder if she not getting her milk requirements and thus was feeding during the night??? Or maybe she just wasn't ready yet? We are trying BLS and she is really definite about when she has had enough!
As the others mentioned - separation anxiety/growth spurts/wonder weeks....a full moon! Who knows sometimes. I guess the most important judge is you - if things are not working for you definitely investigate sleep school, it may be just what you need.
One thing though - I often felt like a failure as my daughter never slept through the night whilst all the other kids seemed too, it was only when I said that she didn;t that others shared similiar scenarios. So don't go thinking that there is necessarily anything you can do or the interrupted sleep is a reflection of the quality of your parenting - every baby is different. We have survived by catching sleep when we can - so I go to bed around 9 each night and alternate sleepins with DH on the weekend. I also remind myself that it will pass (sometimes through gritted teeth and near tears, lol).
Good luck! I hope you get sleep soon - and that EVERYONE else does too!!!!
It won't be long before they are refusing to get out of bed as teenagers!
Oh firstly hugs to you, because it is so tiring when they don't sleep.
I found DD was a bit unsettled at 5.5 months, and I wondered if it was the introduction of solids too. Anyway for about 1.5 weeks she cried every bed/nap time and was SO CLINGY in the day. Then it suddenly passed and she's back to self settling, having long naps and waking once a night.
Hang in there. Babies grow and change so quickly, it could be any number of things. If you haven't got a copy of the Wonder Weeks book, try your local library - it explained a lot for us!
As for feeding every awakening. I tried to stop that too at around 5 months, but with only some success. If I didn't feed her, she would be awake within the hour, but if I fed her I got 2.5 hours sleep, so I always opted for the feed.
My DD has been a great self settler for months, but she still woke every 3 hours in the night, up until we put her in her own room. Then she started sleeping heaps better, and I realised we were waking her up with all our snoring/shuffling etc.
If you think she's genuinely hungry, maybe try and feed her in a darkened room in the day. At this age they are so distracted who knows if they actually take any milk in the day, but once its dark, quiet and boring, they want to suck, suck suck. It might not work straight away, but try some different things for a week and see.
GL hun! HTH
ETA: that was all a bit disjointed, so i hope it made sense!
Oh my god she is screaming blue murder right now, this SUCKS!!!
Missymoo we have tried a dummy numerous times, she chews on it and dribbles everywhere so thats out of the question.
We realised last night its nothing to do with her teeth, she isnt in pain. We are back to where we were 3 months ago when she wouldnt self settle... it feels like Im always posting about this issue!
DP has just gone in there thank god Im so close to either screaming or crying right now.
Thanks again for your replies, Praise BB and its inhabitants, had to log on to save my sanity!
Given your post I would think it is time you checked back with your MCHN about some options including sleep school as it may just provide the support/direction that would help you with your DD. We went to a parenting day centre when DD was 6months and we said no control cry or CIO or anything such and we didn't use those methods- just gentle ones that suited us. DD didn't change her sleep much however it provided MUCH help for DH and I who were going around the twist with DD's sleep issues and not having proper sleep ourselves. It gave us lots of comfort and tips and a sense that we weren't failures etc etc. Best of luck with your DD.
Peach - go see your MCHN or GP and get a referral to sleep school or day stay program! I went to a day program run by our council and it really helped my confidence, they also listened to what methods I was interested in. They will give you some direction so you are both on the same page and are consistent.
You are doing such a good job but it sounds like it is getting too much. Let us know how you go.
I remember my DS going through something similar at about 5 months, we were also both sick with a cold/flu which only made it worse. He wasn't feeding well due to a blocked nose.
The other time we had sleep problems he had an ear infection, he would wake each time we tried to put him down and was wanting to drink more frequently, but was off his food.
I also think they go through a development change at about this age, for my son it was preceeding learning to roll.
I hope your hungry hippo (we use to call our son this too) settles down soon. I did find there was an improvment in his sleep after about 6months, though still have days were he wakes 3x night.
Thanks Girls,
I ended up calling child health and we are now booked into a day stay sleep school. Got the soonest appt which isnt untill the 7th, so just under 2 weeks. Its just hard when neither DP and I are getting rest, and I find myself getting frustrated so easily which is definately not a good thing.
Will let you all know how it goes. Thanks again everyone who replied, it makes it easier knowing I have support.
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