my ds is a toad for eating his lunch... more to the point eating it in his high chair (he's fine for breakfast and dinner).

So i make us both a sandwich and have it up on the bench. I call out to him that i've got some lunch for him, he comes round, takes a bite and keeps playing. once he's finished that mouthful i'll call again or he'll just come back, another mouthful etc. i'll wash up or prep dinner or whatever

it takes a bit of time but cuts the stress and we're both happy.

We also find that even if he refuses his dinner he ALWAYS wants what we are eating. So when he cracks up at dinner, that's it. Over. take him out of his high chair and get on with our evening. If one of us eats something either our dinner or a snack and he asks for some, we just give it to him without too much fuss. (mostly tho we eat after he's in bed as 5pm is waayyy to early for us lol)

Not sure if any of that will be helpful at all. but like the PP said, they won't starve and they will learn pretty quick smart "this is my dinner, if i don't eat that's it til breakfast''.

Ocean Princess (my friend!) i like your approach heaps! It took us awhile to get tough with DS... mainly cos i felt like i 'had to' make him eat, i'd feel guilty if he didn't etc. but you said it so well.