I'm just wondering how much time should a toddler be spending with other children. DD is nearly 19 months and at present we go to mums group every week for about 2-2.5hrs, most weeks we go to gymbaroo and occasionally we catch up with friends bubs or DD's cousins. Is that enough?
Its just cause I've noticed lately that mums I know who don't work are looking into putting there kids into childcare or have already done so just so they can have that time to spend with other kids. Personally I can't afford to pay for a whole day of childcare unless I went and worked an extra shift to pay for it. DD will go into kinder when she gets to that age but for the moment is what she is having enough?
imo what your doing is enough. Your doing a lot of socialising just by taking your dd on your errands. What I liked about being with my kids when they were playing with others was that I could be there to help them learn the social rules. My dd was a bit of a pusher and I was able to use a positive approach to help stop it which they may not have had the time to do in childcare.
I never did anything more with my children other than a weekly trip to playgroup for 2hrs. I just didn't think they needed the 'socialising', they were well adjusted and played with our friends children and other children we saw socially quite well so it wasn't a concern for us.
I think your DD has a great variety of social settings and 'social rules' (thanks teachmum) can be taught anywhere.
Thanks for the replies. I thought she was having enough but started to doubt myself when everyone I met or knew were talking about childcare for socialising. I used to think to myself years ago when we were kids it was rare kids went into childcare and we all turned out ok!
Everyone will have a different idea as to what their childs needs are and if they think childcare is the best way to socialise their children then they will do that, but it really isn't necessary to go to that extent. even just going to a park and playing is socialising them.
i think your DD has plenty of contact with other littlies!
i wouldnt worry about childcare for socialising for Krystal, i have arranged working around dp's hours, to avoid childcare altogether.
we also do gymbaroo, and still meet with our mums group.
trips to the park, swimming even just out to the shops seem to keep Krystal happy!!
If you jump back 30 years most children didn't have any socialising outside of cousins etc, and we all turned out ok.
My ds had weekly playgroup and a weekly kindermusik class but that was all till he was 2. He now goes to pre-kindy 1 morning a week and swimming once a week and that's all. He is a sociable little boy so he hasn't suffered from not being in more regular contact with other kids.
Playgrounds are the best place in my opinion... and they're free!
Bear in mind also that some Mums use the "excuse" of "childcare for socialisation" if they feel some "guilt" over utilising childcare.
(This is NOT a judgement at all, and I mean no offence, just my observation!)
What you are doing sounds ample socialising to me!
(My 3 do a weekly mummies group of 12 children (aged between 4 and 4 months) as well as swimming lessons, and a storytime at the library. PLUS 2 days in childcare because I work 2 days......as such they only have 1 day off a week to just chill.....and if anything they are not socialising any better than the next child: just more knackered!)
Zander has only really ever had one activity a week, it was swimming when he was 6 months old & for the last 1.5 years it's been a 1hr gymnastics class. We did mum's group for about a year but that fizzled out. He has his best friend from mum's group (and my goddaughter) that we see maybe once or twice a month outside of gym and that's pretty much it. He's never been to child care & when I work he's eithr at home with daddy or at Granma's house.
He now goes to preschool (or 3yo kinder) one day a week 9am-3pm and he interacts really well with the other kids, so I don't think he was disadvantaged for not going to child care.
Shellbell keep in mind that children of your daughter's age don't play "together" anyway. Naturally, they are more interested in adults still, particularly their primary care givers. They don't usually start playing "with" other children until they reach kindy age (and some not until they're around 5).
I think what you're doing is adequate. You're doing a great job!
Thanks for all these great replies, I'm feeling alot better now!
We do go to the park often and she loves running round with the other kids, might start her at the library story telling times (they're free too!)
I wonder if they were really in childcare for socialising, or because the mums felt like they needed time out but weren't game to say it because they thought it sounded selfish...better to phrase it like they are doing it for the child LOL. I've always been happy to say that DD was in FDC to give me some 'me time'.
Like Mystifying says, children don't need others to play with until later.
May I quote a few lines from a book I love?
"Again and again all researchers come to the conclusion that what a child needs if s/he is to develop to his/her optimum on all levels- and this includes social development- is a warm, happy, fulfilling home life especially during the early years".
There was also a report by the Lady Gowrie Child Centre some time ago called A Must, A Maybe, or A Mistake- Parents and Toddler Groups. It summed up by saying that groups meet the needs of parents to socialise- not really the toddler. It says that there is no need for formal play groups for under threes as asking them to share, cooperate and get along is not part of their world. (Not to say that we can't started to introduce the concepts).
So it sounds like your DD Shellbell gets plenty of opportunities to socialise. She is still most interested in mum and will be for some time...
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How much time with other kids.
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