Scheduled play time?

[Lolli]

This might seem like a totally ridiculous question but...
I'm thinking of including some definite, scheduled play time as part of our daily routine. It seems some days I get so caught up in doing all the stuff that needs to be done to keep the house running that I don't have a lot of quality playtme with ds. Obviously i do play with him during the day, and I make things like folding the washing into a game, and we have cuddles and read books at night before bed and in the morning, but it still feels like we are not getting enough quality time in.
Does anyone else do this? I don't want to be one of those mums who spends so much time cleaning the house that she never plays with her kids.

[Ozziehoffy]

I work housework around Oskar... so if he wants me to play with him, I stop what I'm doing and do that. If it means something doesn't get done, then so be it... it will still be there tomorrow. My house isn't dirty, but it certainly has many days where it definitely looks like a little kidlet has been doing lots of playing. My reason for stopping what I'm doing (of course if I'm chopping veg or whatever he just waits the 5 mins or I give him a distraction)... is that they're only little for such a short time and I don't want him to have memories of mummy saying...not now I'm too busy etc. So, that's just me and how I decided to do it.

[Liz]

I certainly don't think it would hurt.. provided it's flexible. I wouldn't be forcing him to play if he's happy doing something else. Oh wait - he's 5 mths old. (I had in mind a toddler like my 2 yr old LOL).

I wouldnt' stress too much. I've read & heard a lot that it's not quality time that kids need.. it's quantity. Just the fact he can watch you, and you talk to him, and he knows you're around, is much better than having scheduled play time and nothing else. Knowing mum & dad are around and doing every day things together is all a kid really needs, and spontaneous play with them is all the more fun Ok.. i hope that made sense. LOL.

[dee73]

I had/have the opposite problem - I spend so much time playing with my boys that I don't do any housework!

[Ezz]

Lori I have been thinking the same thing - some days I'm so focused on getting things done that I haven't really sat & played with DS for a solid amount of time - more chatting while I'm doing stuff, or giving him toys etc as I walk past. My DS is about the same age as yours. I think it's harder at this age, because they can't follow you around, or get "in your face" when they want attention! I do try to spend at least one "session" during the day where we just hang out & play together (with toys, books, or just lying on the rug outside while he rolls around ).

[MantaRay]

LR, I think that sounds like a great idea. The boys love having the routine at day care, so they know when it "music time" and when is "craft time" etc. I think that could work really well for you at home also. I also try to include the boys in the cleaning etc, although sometimes it can make for a whole lot of extra work LOL!

[aussienic]

I think its a good idea to make sure you always play but not a structured thing. just go with the flow and do what yu want at the time kwim?

Have fun

[Ozziehoffy]

I had/have the opposite problem - I spend so much time playing with my boys that I don't do any housework!

Lol... I have days like that where I think...omg I was going to do some washing and now it's too late!! hahaha... you know what though, I find it's still there in the morning and those darn fairies didn't come and do it for me! I think that they will love looking back and remembering all the time you played with them though

[AnyDream]

I was at a Triple P positive parenting seminar the other day, and they said it's quality not quantity of your attention that counts. They emphasised it's far more important to pay attention and respond to your child many times throughout the day - usually only for a few minutes each time - than it is to have a big lump of time together. That having been said, if you have the time to spend on more structured activities and its' something you will both enjoy doing together, then that's a bonus really.

Quite often this time happens organically, like when you chat to them while they are in bath, or if you have little rituals like story time before bed. I think weekly rituals are really important too, like every Wednesday we go to the park or every Sunday we go and do a family outing together. Not always possible but nice when you can!!!

[Liz]

it's quality not quantity of your attention that counts. They emphasised it's far more important to pay attention and respond to your child many times throughout the day - usually only for a few minutes each time - than it is to have a big lump of time together.

LOL - exactly the same thought.. yet I've heard that described more as quantity time, not quality time. Geez they like to confuse us don't they?! Perhaps it's a difference in the definition of "quantity".

ETA: eg. you're better off being there for them all day on Saturday, and interacting with them throughout that whole day, and they know you're there when they need you (quantity time = all day) than to say "i'll spend quality time with the kids between 11 & 12 on Saturday".

[rachael24]

I agree with the quality aspect...I wouldnt really say have a set time, but when you do spend time, make it count!

[christy]

I've done both... what I mean is, when my children have been babies & not interested in independant play I have always set times aside, like after morning tea to do something with them, be it music, singing, etc at a younger age. Then I often will play if they want too later as well.

I found when Matilda was little that I didn't feel like I did much with her, just that my day was keeping everything together & not enjoying her. TBH she was pretty full on, so there wasn't much time, but thats when I implemented a "play with mummy" time. Now when we are home, the girls know that after a snack, I'm all theirs. We do crafts, play house etc, read books, whatever they want to do or seem interested in. A lot of cooking happens at that time as well, my cooking, and theirs....

But things generally that they won't play on their own as well. It keeps them going, because then I can get up & prepare lunch & then clean if it really needs it (and only if I have to make a path to the door of their bedroom ).