Self settling

I can really recommend feeding lying down and then sneaking off when she's asleep. You can get a comfy blanket on the floor or do it on your bed at this age since she's not moving.

Is she having any awake time? At that age both mine would be awake for a good portion of the feed/play/feed/sleep cycle. Are you trying to 'get her to sleep' too much? 60 mins of settling should really be 50mins of interaction and 10mins of settling I would think.

I settle for 15mins max then just get them up. In a few weeks she'll need less sleep and you won't feel like you spend the whole time settling.

My son always woke when I put him down. Then I read that it can alarm them a bit to wake up in a different spot to where they went to sleep. Which totally makes sense. So maybe a wrap or just tag teaming (so one holds baby while it sleeps and the other does jobs that need to be done ie dinner).

Try wrapping her, putting her in the middle of your bed, lying down and feeding her to sleep, then sneaking away, either just by leaving or by transferring a dummy in her mouth. That's what I do :)

I just gave her one side cos she was fast asleep. Expressed other side cos I have a feeling she will wake very soon. I. Can't justify waking her at 4 am feeds to do both sides, but I'm sure she isn't filling up. I expressed 70ml from the other side in less than 10 minutes and they were really full. I'll give it to her if she wakes in the next hour...

Tasha around the 4-6 week mark is when your milk will start settling down - up til now your milk production has been mostly hormonal, based on hormones released post-natally. But now supply-demand starts to come into it - how ever much your DD demands, your body will supply.

So if you are struggling with a slight over supply, this should settle really soon.

It's importantly to let DD choose the pace and time of feelings so that your body can react appropriately. Express for comfort, so if you are feeling full, express a little off to soften the breast, as opposed to expressing for ten or more minutes.

Have you given feeding lying down a go, as lots of the PPs have suggested? That way if she does just have the one side and wakes shortly after, you can just keep feeding and doze while you are there.

Thanks OP. Yes I have fed laying down, but I don't very often as I'm not a fan of co sleeping. Only when I'm absolutely desperate. I had to express because DH did the last bottle and I hadn't fed for a few hours. I like to feed, play and then put her in her cot. She's done it before so I know she can do it. I've been sitting here on the couch for 25 minutes rocking her to sleep and she drifts and then wakes. Not crying, but not sleeping. I fed at 7 for 40 minutes and then play time till 8:15. Now I'm still getting her to sleep. She just fights it. I need a shower and I need to pay some bills and tidy up!

If she's not crying, can you take her into the shower with you? Not for a bath, just like on a little seat or rocker or whatever you have. So she can see you and you can see her, and have a shower at the same time.

Bills can wait I say hahahaha

[QUOTE=Arimeh;3348738]If she's not crying, can you take her into the shower with you? Not for a bath, just like on a little seat or rocker or whatever you have. So she can see you and you can see her, and have a shower at the same time.

QUOTE]

My DH used to wheel the bassinette into the bathroom doorway while he showered when I was sleep deprived. More often than not, our DD would fall asleep. She had the comfort of bed, but also being able to see and hear him.. Our bassinette got wheeled around a lot, to where ever we were. if DD was not crying she seemed happy to be in there, but where she could see us..

Tash, do you have a swing? We have the fisher price little lamb and its where our crazy baby naps really well during the day. I think he likes it because he is semi upright, it rocks which he loves and there is music. It's the only place he's ever drifted off without our help too and sometimes when he is overstimulated it soothes him and he will lay quietly just observing, moments after screeching in our arms. I imagine there might be some cheap on eBay because Bubs grow out of them pretty quickly.

Our baby hasn't slept more than an hour at a time since early Monday morning, this is a new party trick but he generally fights sleep even on a good day. So I definitely relate! We just try not to fight it and do whatever works on the day!

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If she's not crying, can you take her into the shower with you? Not for a bath, just like on a little seat or rocker or whatever you have. So she can see you and you can see her, and have a shower at the same time.

Bills can wait I say hahahaha

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No point getting her to sleep now, its been 2.5 hours and she STILL wont sleep :( I put her down and she just cracks it so wont be able to shower. I am holding her right now and she is just crying and cracking it. Overtired because she WONT SLEEP. How is it normal for a 5 week old to NEVER be tired enough to want to sleep!?

If it were me, I'd take her into the shower with you to help calm her down, get out, feed and she'll probably go to sleep.

Or if she hates the shower (all mine loved it) I'd just feed her lying down on the bed.

Some kids are just like that. My two live/d on minimal sleep for the first 2 years. When i stopped trying to make them sleep it got easier for all of us.

Can you take her into the shower with you? Sit on the floor with her if it makes you feel a bit safer. I had a mat with a warm towel ready so i could wrap baby up as soon as i got out. Relaxing bath/shower and boob sometimes did the trick.

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Thanks OP. Yes I have fed laying down, but I don't very often as I'm not a fan of co sleeping.

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You don't have to co-sleep if you don't want to, but if you feed bub lying down and she drifts off, you can then sneak out and she is still warm and cosy. You aren't moving her afterwards.

She never falls asleep during the day after a feed, only if i feed from one side, which doesnt fill her up and she just wakes shortly after anyway :(How do I wash myself and hair with her in the shower? I have a feeding pillow so she is laying down when I feed her anyway, I can't spend my days laying around in bed feeding, I will loose my mind. It's apparent that nothing is working, but I appreciate the advice. God, what I would give for a baby that just sleeps after 15 minutes of settling after feeds. :(

If she falls asleep after the one side, I'd just go with that. Even if she wakes up shortly after, if she's already lying down comfortably on a bed, she might sleep longer than she would if you fed her to sleep on the one side and then moved her? Anyway, it would give you a chance to have a shower and wash your hair, recharge your batteries etc :)

You'll find something that "works" soon, all babies are different, which is why its good to have so many people offering opinions - all mine were different, but basically I fed them to sleep or waited for their sleep cues and put them to sleep. Their tired cues were them getting a little jerky in their movements and looking a little gazey in the eyes. So before yawning, or crying or fussing - if I waited until they made a noise like they were tired, it meant that they were now overtired and hell to get to sleep.

Just my experience obviously!

You're putting way too many expectations on her and in turn causing yourself so much stress. Unfortunately it sounds like you've been misled to believe that babies sleep for long periods and easily adjust to routines and that's not the case. Just follow her lead, it's the best thing you can do. If she needs to be held then hold her, put her in a sling and pay bills, tidy and whatever else that can't wait. Have a shower in the evening when your partner is home. Start the day without expectations. Some babies don't need a lot of sleep. If she is not tired there's nothing you can do to make her sleep. She sounds perfectly normal and the one thing I can hear is that your new baby wants to be close to you. She is new to this world, it's big and scary and full of things she knows nothing about. Hold her, rock her, put her in a sling and I bet she will sleep well. In a sling she can feed on demand, sleep when she wants to, listen to your heartbeat (something she has become used to hearing all day every day in your womb), smell you etc. She's so tiny and new, she wants closeness not a bassinet.

But that's just it, she is tired. She shows all the signs, but yet she just keeps fighting it :(
From people I have spoken to IRL it is not normal for a 5 week old to be having as little as 15 minutes or no sleep between feeds. I will just keep trying to get to the bottom of it.

You sound like you are really struggling, I remember that all to well. I began to wonder why I'd had a baby!

Let go of the routine you've got in your head. Quite obviously its not working so why are you persisting?

Who gives a terd that the CHN gave you a sheet that has babies required sleep hours and feed-play-sleep routine. My mum through it in the bin and told me not to bother with that junk, so glad I listened to her!

I have that baby that by some miracle is thriving on minimal sleep. He's totalling 10 hours of sleep in 24 hours - much less than the recommended 15 hours for a 10 month old. To the people who told me my child will have delays if I don't teach him to self settle so he can sleep 7-7, hes walking at 10 months. Quite evidently, he's getting what he needs. And if I was any more relaxed, I'd be in a coma.

Stop forcing your baby to be like friends baby. It's not working.

For now, leave bub for a couple minutes while you have a shower. She won't die or be scarred for life. You'll be refreshed too.