"No" didn't work- what do I do now??

[amberj]

For the first time tonight when I said "no" to Peter, he didn't listen! Usually a firm "no" works very well. But tonight Peter went to stick his hand in the cat's water bowl and I said "no" and he turned around and smiled at me and then stuck his hand straight in! Welcome to the world of boundary pushing, right?

I said no again and he still didn't listen, so I went over and took the bowl away with a stern look.

I'm just not sure what the appropriate consequences are for his age (13 months). He is too young to understand time out and I'm not about to start yelling at him. Is there any 'discipline' I do at this age, or do I just remove the offending object or distract my child, or what?

[ladybird11]

I know what you mean...DD pushes it with me too...

Being at that age, I remove the temptation altogether (for the record DD loves the dogs water bowl too ). The only thing is when DD chucks a little tanty and she hits me - I turn away and pay no attention to her and it works everytime.

I can't wait till she grasps the concept of a naughty / time out step.

[fionas]

I can count on one hand the number of times "no" has worked on DD.

I tend to move stuff out of the way or if I can give an explanation that I think she will grasp, I'll do that ie. don't pour the contents of your sippy cup on the floor because it makes the floor slippery and look if teddy falls over it's hurty.

I find it really tough because I know some toddlers do actually listen to "no" but DD just doesn't and there is no way I can tell her "no" all day when it does no good. There is absolutely no way she would stay in time out either.

I guess I'm just waiting for the time when she understands the "because" aspect ie. you can't do that because...

Until then, I'm muddling through.

[bubno.3]

For the first time tonight when I said "no" to Peter, he didn't listen! Usually a firm "no" works very well. But tonight Peter went to stick his hand in the cat's water bowl and I said "no" and he turned around and smiled at me and then stuck his hand straight in! Welcome to the world of boundary pushing, right?

I said no again and he still didn't listen, so I went over and took the bowl away with a stern look.

I'm just not sure what the appropriate consequences are for his age (13 months). He is too young to understand time out and I'm not about to start yelling at him. Is there any 'discipline' I do at this age, or do I just remove the offending object or distract my child, or what?

umm you must be a saint if you dont yell at your children! Whats your secret? (mine is 13 months and i fair yelled tonight)(

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

Move the object away, move the child away and play a different game. "No" means "you are not going to do that under any circumstance and I don't care if you tantrum about it."

TBH, I still do that with DS. If he's ignoring "no" it's usually because I'm ignoring him so it's time to get playing!

[shellbell3]

I remember at that age saying no and diverting their attention towards something else. Moving the temptation also helped and moving them away from it also.

[Doing my best]

I change the tone of my voice to quite stern, say no, and take DD and the item away from each other..

She knows but tests the boundaries (and I have been known to yell since being pg and patience wears thin, but feel so bad )..

[Indadhanu]

I'm interested too... Jazz loves it when I say no. Makes her do it more in fact. She gives me the cheekiest look, turns back around, does it again, and then turns to me as if to say "I did it, so there".

Diversion is the only thing that works here.

For the record, Jazz loves the cats bowl too. We've had to move it as it was the only thing she would do when we go outside - straight for the bowl. If you moved her away, straight back to the bowl...

[SammyRo]

Leasha, DD does the same as Jazz - its not to laugh sometimes! She will also shake her head and still do it as I say no! Cheeky monkey.

Although, DD has started throwing mini-tantrums - if I take away the item, she throws her self to the floor and then lets of a high pitched wail - I ignore this as 2 seconds later, she'll get up and do something else.

Lady Zaidie - I find its the same with DD - its often just to get my attention, so I go and play or read etc.

[onthefly]

DS likes to play 'coooking' with the cat's bowl. He puts catfood in there and mixes it around.
Same here - when I say no, DS usually shakes his head and does it anyway (sometimes with a cheeky grin). He is getting better though, more and more he is sometimes able to stop.
They lack impulse control at this age, so even when they understand no, they can't always stop themselves (and let's face it, don't always want to.)
I think the only thing you can really do is remove the temptation. I guess the most appropriate consequence is not being able to get at whatever it was they wanted...?

[Snacks]

I think it is a great idea to get the hang of using diversion early on. I think I have relied on the word 'no' far too much - it is now Natty's favourite word to say to me.