2 1/2 year old will NOt stay in bed (sorry - long)
My DD went into her big girls bed in Nov 2009. She had turned 2 in the Sep, her baby brother was born at the end of Sep. We set the bed up in Oct and kept her cot in the room too so she could choose which one she wanted to sleep in. After about a month of having the bed set up she decided to sleep in it and did really well for a whole month - never getting out.
In Dec she started climbing out several times early in the night so we set the porta cot up (DS had cot by this stage) and she slept in there. Sometimes she would choose the bed and go okay but if she got up too many times we would put her back in cot.
About 2 weeks ago we decided to pack up the porta-cot (did the whle drama of "Bye bye" cot etc.) and set up the trundle bed so once again she could choose between the two (one being lower and maybe safer?). Her bed has a rail on it too.
Since then she has slept in either one through the whole night once she goes to sleep but going to sleep can somtimes take up to an hour. We stay at the door and put her back, we have yelled, told her off, tried stickers as rewards, read stories in bed etc. NOTHING seems to work.
As I write I have already put her back at least 6 times. It doesn't seem to matter if we stay at the door or in the lounge. One night we turned off all lights so she didn't think we were up but it didn't make a difference. She has a night light so she can see if she needs.
I have the same problem with my DD. I just sit in her room playing on the computer which I am doing write now lol.. I also play her this lullaby I found on youtube and it truly seems to calm her down
My Ds was a shocker for getting out of bed (ds1) eventually we had to shut the door but he hated that so we put a baby gate up and that did the trick after a few weeks of him crying at the gate..
When she gets up, give her no attention. Take her hand and lead her back to bed, saying nothing but Good Night and leave the room.
I did this up to 30 times a night for awhile but eventually it was effective because there was no point to her getting up because nothing interesting happened when she did.
We had a safety gate on #1's door for ages, because we couldn't think of anything. That worked.
Now, he has a wind up torch that we give him, and he lies in bed and plays with the torch. I wonder if a torch that projects pictures would help? Might not though.
Another option is, will she sleep in your bed? We have a spare bed, and sometimes he'll sleep in that bed (or sometimes we find him in the hallway!) and we just transfer him before we head to bed.
been thru this phase too... tried the not giving attention and putting her back in and it lasted for an hour and a half before i gave in and decided it wasn't the right strategy for her.... she thought it was a game and was thoroughly enjoying herself, minx!
its awful when you are going through it but it does eventually end... our rule is bedtime means going into your bedroom and not coming out... if she isn't tired i can't FORCE her to sleep, so she is allowed to read books in bed, play quietly (preferably in bed), or play on her little computer in bed etc.... but NO coming out of the room.... it took a while but works great now, and its also great for when you know you have put them to bed too early (for example they had a late nap or fell asleep in the car) - they can sit up in bed and amuse themselves until they are tired and you don't have to have them up with you in the evenings (my evenings are my sane time)...
she is now 3 and goes to bed beautifully... sometimes she protests and says she's not tired and doesn't want to go to bed, and we just say she doesn't have to, and put her in there and read her a story anyway and say night night, then its up to her.... 9 times out of 10 she will go to sleep, sometimes she will sing songs at top of her lungs until she is tired, but honestly she NEVER comes out.... and i was nearly pulling my hair out not that long ago as she would get up out of bed for up to 3 hours and i was at my wits end...
personally i think you have to pick a strategy and stick to it, ours has worked incredibly well for us, i see the super nanny working wonders with the no attention and straight back to bed theory.... i sort of think maybe stop messing around with different beds etc, i don't think its the actual bed she is sleeping in, she's more just going thru the stage they all go thru of testing boundaries at bedtime, i think the cot/bed/portacot/trundle bed thing might be irelevant and could be floating her boat in terms of her getting attention etc at bedtime, plus it might be a bit inconsistent if you want to come across in a no nonsense sort of way. just my thoughts... good luck, i don't envy you its the pits!!
DS is the same age as your DD. He went through a patch (read months) of getting up multiple times. Like you we tried reasoning, bribes, yelling, putting him back, shutting the door etc.
Now I sit in there until he goes to sleep. It is the only way that he will stay in there. I don't give him any attention, just sit there like a statue. The plan is to get him going to sleep quickly with me in there (which is starting to happen) and then I will start moving away from the bed, then out the door.
Good luck. I know it is hard to manage when you have the baby too.
Reason i wont move DD#3 (same age as your DD) into a big bed until well after 3.
I did this with DD#2....she didnt move into a big bed until 3yrs old...i just knew she would be the type of kid that would wander around the house, thinking it was fun, a game, and having no sense of being told to go back to her own bed.
For me, it was in the too hard basket....i figure when they're 3, there that little bit older, understand a bit more, and hopefully the thrill of getting out of a big bed would be old news.....
I like the idea of the safety gate though...never thought of that.
Don't want to sound abrupt but this will be a quick reply as I need to get off the computer!
I personally agree that you shouldn't be switching beds or giving the option of chooosing a bed. Her bed is her bed, there should be only one, and she needs to get used to it.
When I introduced both my DDs to their big girls' beds they were 2 and a half I think... and we just had a rule that once you're in bed you stay in bed. UNless you're feeling sick then you can come and get mummy, or unless you need to go to the toilet etc. But other than that - if they got out of bed - then it was straight back to bed, led by the hand, just quietly said to them "back to bed buddy, sleep time now, we don't get out of bed at night time, til the clock starts with a 7 (digital clock in their room)" etc.
We have had a few nights of wild excuses... "I can't sleep because... because.. um... because... I had a dream about... um... a frog".... so then straight back to bed with the spiel about not getting out... and being firm but kind ... and consistent.
Good luck.... frustrating isn't it... hope it all fixes itself soon.
YUP!!! and it did'nt take long for him to start giving excuses either (was'nt tired, needed a drink, heard a noise, wondered why we were't in bed, needed the toilet, even though he was still in a nappy???)safety gate helped..until he realised he could push it down..so then it got screwed in!!! which resulted in him yelling and screaming at it for hours very distressing,in the end we bought a torch, gave him some special toys and books that were only for his room at bedtime and he just seemed to grow out of it..
Oldest DD no problems, next DD no prob, but I reckon with little DD 18 months old we may have a similar issue, she currenlty is in a cot/co sleeps and wakes up a lot during the night, so i can see when she gets into a bed she will just hop up when ever, not bad if you are in bed but a real hassle, if it still early!!!!
Goodluck they do grow out of it eventually...??????????????????????
Tonight DH said to DS "When it's time for bed I don't want you to get up, ask for the toilet or ask to brush your teeth" to which DS replies "But it's funny"....SERIOUSLY!
The time here is now 9:50 and I've put him back to bed about 6 times. We've had...toilet, teeth, got a pimple, a scratch, need a drink, a cuddle excuses. I usually just lead him back to bed saying the same thing every time...."back to bed, it's time for sleep" I can see this is clearly a phase and I know he'll get over it soon I HOPE!
I agree with some others with the bed too....just make one bed her bed....to me, it doesn't really matter if they get out, come out of their room....they will get it eventually. It is frustrating, but I think there are worse things they could be doing.
Hope your DD gets over it sooner rather than later
My DS will be 2 in just under two weeks and we're having this happen periodically too. Was really bad when we first took the side of the cot, but after some good advice, we have stuck with just telling him to get back into bed and leading him there.
We also have a flip-out lounge and pillow on the floor next to the bed as we found he kept falling asleep on the floor We think it was the novelty!
Tonight he got out a few times, but I think he's overtired. Tonight's the worst it's been for weeks!
Good luck and keep persisting. It DOES work (but you have to always do it - they'll know if you're going to give in!!).
2 1/2 year old will NOt stay in bed (sorry - long)
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We think it was the novelty!
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