Its so heartbreaking. My 6 month old DD will cry as soon as I leave..... even if I leave her at home with her dad she will cry the whole time I am gone.

I know every parent goes through it but I just cant do it. I see her and want to make up for lost time, I want to sleep next to her coz I havent seen her all day, I want to hug her till she pops.

I walked in today and she was screaming I could hear her from down the hall. As soon as I picked her up she stopped and smiled at me.

I dont think either of us are ready and when I asked DP about me doing family day care he thought it was a really bad idea and asked when would I ever go back to work and I cant possibly want to do that for the rest of my life. Then he got angry when I said he didnt understand. If it means I can stay with DD Ill do it, maybe I will absolutely love it and want to do it forever, maybe it will just get me by until she is 2 and old enough to play with the other kids. Either way I cant get through to him that IT IS WORK. It is money coming in still and it is the opportunity to learn, play and possibly adore what I am doing rather then feeling forced back into a workforce that although I am really good at, I dont want to do.

Im sorry I just needed to vent to people who understood. I cant do it for much longer, I cant walk away from her when she obviously needs me and to be honest, I think I need her too.