Settling a 20 month old - Please help!!!

[Tenn]

Hi All
I am having some problems settling my 20 month old boy at night. He is in the big bed now which is great and he usually sleeps all night until about 6.00 when he comes and just into bed with us, but my problem is getting him to sleep. We have resorted to rocking him every night. Now this is going to be an even bigger issue for us soon because we are expecting number 2 in december, does anyone have any ideas?????

[MantaRay]

Tenn, does he have a comforter at all?

I am not really sure what to suggest. My 21mo falls asleep really easily, but he sucks his thumb and holds his sheet up to his cheek. Without that he probably wouldn't settle. My 3yo has good nights, and other nights we need to lie with him for a while until he's sleepy then we can leave (unless it's my DH who lies with him, he usually falls asleep before DS LOL!). I think there are some kids who will need help getting to sleep for quite a while, but they all eventually learn to fall asleep by themselves.

GL, I hope you find something that works.

[Tenn]

Yes he does, he has a dummy and also a little blanket. The problem is he won't stay lying down when we put him into bed he just jumps straight back up again. He is like that in the morning as well as soon as he wakes up he jumps up and is ready for the day!

[MantaRay]

Tenn, my DS is like that in the mornings too. I am just lucky that he is so tired at night that he lies downs and sleeps as soon as he gets near bed. In fact he is usually crying to be put to bed LOL!!

Have you tried staying lying on the floor (on a matress or just the floor) for a while to see if he copies? Also I find that when he has trouble settling some soothing music can help.

I'll keep trying to think of ideas.

[KymH]

May not be much help, but I have a 16mo old who is VERY slowly learning to go to sleep on her own...

This is what we do atm:

Have her room already set up (ie. low light, covers turned down etc.)
Books in living room then walk into room
Sit on a chair beside cot and have a cuddle (we don't need to rock, just hold her)
Cuddle in silence until she gets out the last of her energy wriggling, talking, kicking etc...
Put her in cot (almost always awake, but by now very sleepy) with kiss on cheek, light off, out we go.

She is almost always asleep a couple of min later (I assume....) We don't let her cry, so if for some reason she doesn't go to sleep and gets upset, we go in and repeat.

The key I have found is to wait until she has really wound down. Sometimes this takes 10min and sometimes 30, but it's how we've weaned off the rocking.

Maybe you could try a little cuddle without rocking all the way to sleep, then into bed, even if you still stay beside him till asleep.

My other advice would also be to TRY (I know its hard) not to put pressure on yourself and think of it like a countdown that you all have to have it sorted by Dec.... the chances are that he will sort himself out by then and if you put pressure on yourself or him, he may sense it and get even more 2yr-oldish!!!!

All the best.