urgent help needed fast!

[ShanJakson]

Hi ladies,
I have a 2.5 year old son and a 7 week old daughter. Our son is a fantastic sleeper but out 7 week old is a nightmare!! She is feeding every 3 to 3.5hrs and taking both sides and content afterwards. Her problem is sleeping. I wrap her up and she falls asleep nearly instantally, but when I put her down she only stays asleep for 5 minutes, max 10. Sometimes she will get to 20minues but rarely. I keep having to resettle her all the time, which as you can imagine is hard with a toddler also. I have tried to let her have a little cry to see if she will settle, but no luck. I have also tried getting her up after the 20mins she has and putting her in the car, swing or pram to encourage more sleep before the next feed, but no luck either. She just won't sleep!!!! I am going insane. She sleeps wonderfully overnight. She will finally fall asleep at night around 7.30pm and only wake once around 3-4am and then straight back to sleep until 7am.
Please help me work out why she won't sleep during the day before I go mad...... many thanks in advance
shannon

[Jas]

Hi,

A few weeks ago I was in this exact same position!!!! And even 20mins would have been amazing!!! From say 7am-7pm Spence would sleep about 1hr total all broken! I read books I googled I did everything I could, although I appreciate mums who use slings a lot its not something I really wanted to do, one day I was getting desperate and my mum said why dont u just relax sit on the lounge watch a movie or tv and let Spence have a rest on you so that at least we both get a rest an he gets some sleep (it was Noah's sleep time) this actually help and after being asleep with me for wuite a while i just sat him on the lounge and he stayed asleep and did for another45mins this was a massive victory at the time

sleep creates sleep so even though wearing bubs in a sling might not be something u want long term just for a little while it might help get a routine going. At the time it was stressful and I felt like it would never end! EVER! But weeks on Spence is in a great routine he only sleeps about an hr at a time but is on a almost to the minute 3hr routine and sleeps 9hrs at night and then another 3 about so he is going really well.

It sounds like u may have a similar experience to me ds1 slept 12hr a night from 4days old and was a very sleepy baby for day naps so sleep wasnt really a planned thing or something i had to work towards, I think if its a sling that works for a bit then go for it at least it frees you up a bit then maybe once the sleeps are longer, even if it only takes helf a day and then try going back to the cot/ basinette etc and see if the sleep creates sleep thing works.

I think ultimately it is whatever works for you and really it is something bubs will grow out and it will all feel like a distant memory, the other thing that I find works is putting bubs down awake and let them fall asleep in the sot instead of rocking to sleep, using music, patting, shhhhing (I used shh shh shh just said it over and over to put spenc eto sleep and it becomes a sleep cue so then sometimes when he is stirring or if he has been rocked to sleep or moved while asleep i can say it while i put him down and it resettles,

HTH

[PinkPalace]

hi there!

my paed gave me the best advice. (i had 2 under 15 months).

He said regardless of whether they are tired or not, wrap and put them to bed EVRY 1.5hr-2hrs.
yes it makes for a boring social life but, as soon as i started doing this - he was sleeping so much better during the day.

for ex.
if he slept 8am -8.40am - he would be back in bed by 930.
if he slept 8am -9.20am - he would be back in bed by 10.

never ever kept him up longer than 2 hrs - even if it meant he was only awke for 40mins at a time.

also try to keep to a strict routine,

DS also was colic and reflux (he was waking every 2 hours through the night too until 5months).
ANd i found i had to keep him upright as long as i could after a feed . Otherwise would get upset with wind and reflux pain.

i dont mean to say this is the same, but it helped.
I invested in a cradle swing and i would sit up right in that after a feed with a slight rock (to help burp) while i needed spare hands with my toddler.

the other thing i did was sleep on his belly from 2 weeks.
This helped him settle a heap better.

it is really trial and error. BUt yep for sure the 1.5-2hr rule worked a absolute treat for us, he got into routine and has been a dream ever since with his sleeping.

HTH

[Fleur]

Hi SHannon. I have a 4 week old who is a bit similar. She gets rocked or patted to sleep & usually wakes as soon as she is put down. And she also sleeps very well at night.

What I do find is that the longer I hold her & let her get into a deep sleep, the longer she will sleep when she is put down.
Are you wrapping her?
Also sometimes I will put her in her rocker & rock her for a bit after she is put down, that helps to get her in a deeper sleep & stay asleep.


Sorry I don't have any easy answers... it's all a bit of trial & error in these early days! Hope you find something that works for you soon.

[ShanJakson]

hey thanks for your quick replies. i have a sling that she falls asleep in instantally, but don't want to do that for each sleep coz won't she then only fall alseep in the sling and never by herself? yes i am wrapping her.

[Janie]

Trust me, although she might like sling, she won't do it forever . If it's what works for now, then go with it. More important that she gets the sleep (and you the rest!). I spent many an hour sitting with my DS in my arms, or with him sleeping in a sling, just so he would SLEEP! He now sleeps by himself just fine

[Olive]

how long is she up between sleeps?? i second PP with putting down after a short amount of time, before they show tired signs and you miss the boat

[ShanJakson]

she is up for abour 1.5hrs before i put her back down again. if i try and put her down earlier she won't go to sleep, but later she is a rightoff!
is it bad to let her sleep in my arms until she is in a deep sleep, say 20mins and then put her down? will i create a bad habit?

[Olive]

you cant spoil her at this age! do what you need to do hun!!
1.5 hrs is alot maybe try 75 mins then out her down

[Chocaholic]

Don't worry about creating bad habits at the moment. In another couple of weeks it will all change again (usually about 4 months old for my boys).

Good luck and go with what works

[MummyNaomi]

is it bad to let her sleep in my arms until she is in a deep sleep, say 20mins and then put her down? will i create a bad habit?

I would call this a 'loving habit'. I almost always rock/cuddle Bailey to sleep and will continue to do so until he will no longer let me (I can see him at 18yo telling me it's just not working anymore LMAO). Get those precious cuddles in while you can, they grow up too quickly, and enjoy the few moments of getting to sit and relax yourself

[Toomanytoomany]

hey thanks for your quick replies. i have a sling that she falls asleep in instantally, but don't want to do that for each sleep coz won't she then only fall alseep in the sling and never by herself? yes i am wrapping her.

no, she won't always. She's telling you right now that she needs to be close to you. Given that she sleeps brilliantly overnight, I wouldn't stress that you are setting up 'bad' habits.