Birth Options - What would you do?

**nel1574** · November 22nd, 2012, 07:46 AM

I have had a rough run this pregnancy, now I am close to giving birth the anxiety & nightmares etc, are really not helping! I have had extreme anxiety throughout. Options are to have the baby at my local hospital either by going into labour naturally or by Tuesday having AROM & seeing what happens, the only method of pain relief would be morphine. They are not offering an epidural unless I'm in active labour & 4cm dilated. OR go to the closest major hospital & getting an epidural & then having AROM. the doctor at the major hospital realises I'm anxious & have fast & scary labours so he is happy to do whatever it takes to get me through it. This is my 5th baby, I have 3 live children, the last birth was only 1hr 50mins, very fast, painful & scary. I feel like saying to my local doctor, just to do a C-Section because then my baby will be here in 30mins!! But no, he says there is no clinical reason to do a C-Section or set up an epidural at the beginning of labour, even though he knows how scared & anxious I am, surely the local hospital can change rules on a patient by patient basis, so I don't have to go elsewhere!! What would you do????

**HotI** · November 22nd, 2012, 07:56 AM

does your local hospital have a patient advocate or social worker? i would contact them and ask them to help you achieve what you want.

**jellybean88** · November 22nd, 2012, 08:10 AM

I would wait to go into labour myself because I think knowing when I get induced might make me more anxious but whatever makes you more comfortable see if there is someone at hospital who you can talk to that will listen

**Traveller** · November 22nd, 2012, 08:26 AM

The doctor at the major hospital sounds more in tune with your needs but it might be worth contacting a patient advocate at your local hospital and finding out if there is a way for them to cater to your needs. It's not unreasonable for you to have your anxiety considered when preparing for birth and yes, they should make decisions like when to administer an epidural on a case by case basis. Do you have someone who could support you in a meeting with the local hospital board to get this organised? If not, or if that all seems like too much work, then my gut would say go to the larger hospital where you know you will get the support you need. Best of luck with your decision and your birth.

**Amaunet** · November 22nd, 2012, 08:24 AM

You need to go to wherever you feel they are listening to you and your concerns. Sounds like your local hossy aren't willing to "negotiate" with you to help alleviate your anxiety. I agree with finding the patient advocate/social worker.

**LionsandBears** · November 22nd, 2012, 08:31 AM

Is your anxiety about the birth itself? Could you debrief with a birth counsellor? Or perhaps engage a doula or private midwife who can hold your hand through the birth?

Maternal mental health is an extremely important part of the birth. If you feel you'd have better control through a planned c-section, then you can either arrange one with a private OB, or discuss with a hospital psychologist. C-section has it's own pros and cons. An induction before your body is ready can be hard on your body, though. Would the doctor at the major hospital agree to a scheduled c-section?

If the major hospital is better equipped to manage your birth to reduce your anxiety, then I would go with them.

**Saffy** · November 22nd, 2012, 08:41 AM

I would go to the hospital that offers the elective epidural prior to the ARM. Plenty of women have this at the private hospital I work at and it sounds like you would be a good candidate for it given your history.

**PumpkinZulu** · November 22nd, 2012, 09:12 AM

If it's an option for you, I'd also look at getting a private midwife or doula to advocate for you to get the birth you want. It sounds like the bigger hospital is more in tune with your needs.

**nel1574** · November 23rd, 2012, 06:20 AM

Yay!! Got a call at 7am this morning, the head doctor has organized an induction with epidural for Monday morning at the bigger hospital!! Now all I have to do is close my legs until then!!!

**Traveller** · November 23rd, 2012, 09:32 AM

fantastic, that's great you got this organised and you are being supported in your wishes

**sloane** · November 23rd, 2012, 11:17 AM

that's great news! I'm glad you've found someone who supported you & you get the opportunity to have a birth you feel comfortable with. Look forward to reading your BA

**Cassius2** · November 23rd, 2012, 12:53 PM

Big hugs Nel

I am thinking of you and sending you many birth blessings for Monday xx

**PumpkinZulu** · November 23rd, 2012, 02:18 PM

I'm so glad you're being and feeling supported in your choice of birth

Now you can relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

**nel1574** · November 23rd, 2012, 08:03 PM

Thanks everyone xxx

**Chrispe** · November 23rd, 2012, 09:59 PM

I have had a rough run this pregnancy, now I am close to giving birth the anxiety & nightmares etc, are really not helping! I have had extreme anxiety throughout. Options are to have the baby at my local hospital either by going into labour naturally or by Tuesday having AROM & seeing what happens, the only method of pain relief would be morphine. They are not offering an epidural unless I'm in active labour & 4cm dilated. OR go to the closest major hospital & getting an epidural & then having AROM. the doctor at the major hospital realises I'm anxious & have fast & scary labours so he is happy to do whatever it takes to get me through it. This is my 5th baby, I have 3 live children, the last birth was only 1hr 50mins, very fast, painful & scary. I feel like saying to my local doctor, just to do a C-Section because then my baby will be here in 30mins!! But no, he says there is no clinical reason to do a C-Section or set up an epidural at the beginning of labour, even though he knows how scared & anxious I am, surely the local hospital can change rules on a patient by patient basis, so I don't have to go elsewhere!! What would you do????

Hugs.
I hope you are able to find what suits you best. What are your DH/ DP thoughts?
When I had my last bub we were givent the option of 2 hospitals, one with a level 3 neonatal nursery, one with a level 2. I had a prem last baby but my Ob was so convinced I wouldn't have any trouble with this pregnancy. Haha I started Pre-labour at 27 weeks. Because I had already picked the level 3 hospital I had no problems with them treating me and we managed to get to 38+1 weeks. It did take a bit longer to drive there but worked out better in the end.

As far as a clinical reason for c-section, maternal anxiety is a reason. But c-section does have its own risks to the baby's health.
You said this is your 5th baby, with 3 live children. May I ask if your 4th is you angel? It would explain a lot of your anxiety. (although I understand birth can be scary anyway)

I used to be against having epidural in labour (for me anyway) but my last 2 births I considered it because of my own fear. If you believe you need the epidural to help lower your anxiety then by all means go for it! Go to the hospital you feel will support YOUR birth choices the best!