I had a 14hr long labour with my 1st bub - but i ended up having a epi (which i still get so upset about) and with the epi i had that drug that brings on ur contractions quicker and faster, so maybe thats why it was only 14hrs.
When i fall pregnant again (not any time soon) i would really like to do it all on my own without any drugs - but i dont want it to be quicker, i actually want it to be longer, so its kinda like my 1st all over again, and hopefully that will help me get over the dissapointment of how my 1st labour went - what are my chances of a longer labour 2nd time round?
Am i weird for wanting a longer labour? hahaha
My first labour was long (18 hours), painful (posterior bub) and ended badly (CS under a general anasthetic). My second was pretty short (about 7 hours) still very painful but much much better. It too didn't end as I planned as my little VBAC monkey turned posterior at the last moment and didn't come down properly. She was helped into her Mummy arms with an epi and a forceps delivery. I think if I had a third (which I"M NOT), it might be easier again. I was better prepared the second time, I understood what my body and my baby wanted to do, the pain didn't scare me and I didn't lose control like I did the first time.
I think most subsequent labours would be easier or better as the experience of the first helps enormously.
i dont want it too be easier or any less painfull and i don't want it too be only a couple of hours long - i want to be able to prove to myself that i can do it, and not fail 2nd time round and give into a epi!
hahaha i guess only time will tell!
i did fail in a way- cause i should of stood my ground and put off having the epi when they all recommended it too me.
I was against it the whole pregnancy - so why did i give in so easily?
2nd time round im determined to not give in! I know i can do it, i just hope i have a long 2nd labour!
I know exactly how you feel! With ds1 I had an epidural as they thought I was only in early labour as it turned out I was 9cm already! I felt so ripped off and like I'd failed because I had an epidural. My whole labour was 10 hours. Second time round I was much more confident in my body's ability to give birth, we also did a calmbirth course which really helped me stay relaxed and focused, and had a drug free birth, the labour was around 5 hours from the start of contractions. Even though my second was much quicker I actually enjoyed it more as I felt in control and wasn't scared. Every birth is just so different. I also look back and wish it was longer as I actually enjoyed the labour this time round and felt like I could do it all over again! I actually said to dh about 10 minutes after I gave birth I want to do that again! How weird am I?!
hj - It is really hard when you feel like you have failed during your birth. Talk as much as you can here to debrief, but one thing I would say it not to focus on the time of either birth as you can't really control that. What you can do though it make sure you are well supported going into your second birth, and know what you want and have the resources to stand firm. You might find that Hypnobirthing classes might help, books like New Active Birth might help with positioning and pain relief etc. There is alot you can do to make sure you have an empowered birth second time around hun- just do your research and get loads of support - maybe look into have a doula next time too.
Will my 2nd one be quicker?
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Talk as much as you can here to debrief, but one thing I would say it not to focus on the time of either birth as you can't really control that. What you can do though it make sure you are well supported going into your second birth, and know what you want and have the resources to stand firm. You might find that Hypnobirthing classes might help, books like New Active Birth might help with positioning and pain relief etc. There is alot you can do to make sure you have an empowered birth second time around hun- just do your research and get loads of support - maybe look into have a doula next time too.
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