Il try my best not to make this too long!!! but i really just want to write it out.
My due date was 20th July, there had been a few date changes so i wasnt sure this was right but it was the date to docs were going with. I went into see my OB on the 29th and was told that i would be in on the 31st to be induced. I was keen to avoid this but was a bit flustered and agreed to come in on that date to see if i could go a few more days, although this would probably be unlikely as they wanted to deliver my baby before the weeked due to staffing levels! (1st )
I left quite upset an cried all the way home, to make it worse the OB had convinced my DH that i was putting my baby at risk and it was his job to convince me to be induced...which scared him!
We went to the hospital at 7am on the 31st, i had sat up most the night, scared of induction, and geting confidence from BB and said NO THANKYOU to my OBs offer of induction. I then had my OB and a lovely MW having a heated conversation over my choice. Thank goodness the MW was on my side. We ( the MW and I ) finally pursuaded the OB that if i had monitoring for a bit and an ultrasound i could wait a few more days.
I had a VE and was 2cms, i had a S&S and was told to go for a good walk, and come back at 4pm for an ultrasound. We live about an hour from the hospital but it was only 8am so decided to drive home and come back for my US. (all in all 4 hours driving to and from hospital so far) I was so over being in the car, so uncomfortable!!
US fine, Baby fine, Mum fine, Lovely.....What a long crappy day!!
On the way home at about 5pm i decided i NEEDED to have a rack of ribs as we were sitting in the restaurant, rib sauce dripping from my fingers, i had my first contraction, i knew right away i was in labour! I ignored it long enough to finish my ribs before telling DH! We payed quickly...(waitress asked if everything had been ok as we were leaving so quickly ''yes everything was lovely, ive just gone into labour" she nearly fell over)
My plan was to labour at home as long as i could, my contractions were 5 mins apart and regualar...and i was actually surprised at how painful they were right away...i remember saying to DH "this is REALLY going to hurt" !!
I used the shower till the hot water ran out, then walked around the lounge a bit, i was finding it easier to kneel with each cx. By 9pm DH got the car packed and made me go to hospital, at the time i wasnt happy but looking back im glad we did, the drive was terrible and would have hated to have left later!
About 10pm, We went straight to the birth suite and was set up in a room and met the first of many midwives and handed over my birth plan. Jumped in the shower. BLISS
About 11.30pm i got out the shower, not sure why? Remember getting annoyed at the MW (the second for the night) who just sat in a chair right next to me and talked at me the whole time...was glad when she left for the night!!!
About 12.30 my new MW arrived and read my charts, I had had a SVT during my pregnancy (where my heart starts to race @ 190bpm and i have to have an injection to reset it) and she was worried it would be a problem, i had seen a heart specialist during my pregnancy and got a letter saying it would NOT be a problem but she wanted to see for her self so she dragged her own heart specialist in and i was made to lie on the bed during contraction and keep still so they could get a good reading! (2nd)
About 1am told the five people in my room, including heart specialist to rack off..."i know when im in SVT and im not now.....my heart rate is slightly raised...because your making me angry and im in LABOUR"
It was down hill from here...i started to panic and couldnt get back into a good frame of mind, the mantra of ''good pain" was not working, the shower didnt apeal anymore, no amount of walking or talking helped. i just kept thinking not again with each cx.
About 3am I demanded a VE (mistake) and being told i was 4cm after almost 12 hours sent me into a tail spin! I totally flaked. and out came the words i had dredded saying ''just give me an epidural''!! I had expected someone, anyone, to try and pursuade me otherwise...considering i had been specific in my BP that i knew id say it and wanted to be given other options, even DH said ''what ever you need darling''
But before i knew what was going on i was doubled over with a needle in my spine!!(3rd)
From 4am till 8am i just lay there feeling like a huge failure....not feeling my baby or my cx, just watching that little beep on the monitor. i couldnt move due to all the wires and monitors and catheter etc...not what i had planned atall! I slept a bit. DH slept a bit.
About 8am my beautiful MW arrived, my saviour, "Well, what have we here, this isnt what your Birth plan says you wanted"...finally someone had read it!! "well, lets make the best of this" she had my epidural turned down so i could feel the contactions a bit, i asked her to take it out but she explained that the sudden hit of pain would be too much. I could feel legs abit now and managed to move around a bit more.
About 11am everything had slowed right down so my MW broke my waters, the cx got stronger and i could feel things moving along, i still couldnt get off the bed as my legs really didnt work!
About 12pm i was felt ready to puch...had another VE and was 10cm. I began pushing and trying to find a good position. DH really came into his won now and gave me the encouragment i need to get it over with. He was goin between looking 'down there' and talking to me and at one point he said ''i can see blonde hair, shes blonde" !! I got the WORST cramp in my leg and couldnt push...i moved onto my side. A few more pushes and she was out. about 1 hour of pushing!
She was put on my chest and we stared into eachothers eyes, i started to feed her but my MW wanted to deliver the placenta as there was quite alot of blood, so she was handed to DH. I just watched her stare into DHs eyes!
About 1.30pm my MIL knocked on the door, i was still laying there with my placenta in a tray by my bed!! but it was ok, we were actually glad she came. DH decided to go and get some food for us all.
About 1.45pm everytime i moved a huge gush of blood would come out and id soak the bed...i knew it wasnt right and kept asking the MW, ''its ok'' shed say...then she called an OB i was given a form to sign declaring that if they had to remove my womb it was ok. WTF!!!!
DH was still out getting food, i remember asking if the doctors could lie and tell him id just gone to another room rather than to theatre!! luckily he came back before i was taken away.
About 2pm i was wheeled away from my baby after only holding her for about ten mins, leaving my terrified DH. I had been told there was alot of blood! what that ment i didnt know!!
They wanted to give me a general anasthetic but i knew if i had that i would be out for HOURS and i desperatly wanted to go back to my baby. so i convinced them to use my epidural which i still had in and i had a spinal block. The memory of being strapped to the bed with my legs up in the air and about ten people milling around, trying to decided why i wouldnt stop bleeding is horrendous. One after another doctors came in to try and find the bleed. in the end they put a few stitches in a few places and sent me to recovery. If it hadnt been for the beautiful lady who stroked my head and wispered that everything would be fine the whole way through i think i would have tried to get up and leave!!
About 5pm someone called DH and told him i was out of theatre and was ok. I was still bleeding and in crying cause i just wanted to go back to my baby. I couldnt even remember what she looked like! I was told i had lost almost 2 litres of blood and had a tear in my cervix! but it was fixed now.
About 6pm. FINALLY, there she was, in my arms again, after 5 hours. Turns out DH had a bit of a break down and thought i had died! He couldnt hold DD and thank goodness MIL was there as she held DD and talked to her the whole time!! I was just so glad it was over.
I feel terrible for having the epidural and im sure it lead to the bleeding. I couldnt walk for another two days and still have a little numb spot on the end of my left big toe from it!! I will do ALL i can to avoid it next time! DD was fine and although DH has a huge fear of me getting pregnant again i think we all came out of it ok!\
Thanks so much for reading if you got this far!! Sorry it ended up so long...its so hard to keep these things short and sweet!!
When i wrote my birth story the other night i was feeling a bit low about things after talking about it with a friend and thought writing it out would help me feel abit better.
Ive just re-read it and it sounds quite negative. Im proud of myself for how i did for the first part and after and my DH is always telling me how amazingly i did and how exhusted i was when i had the Epidural...but im sure every woman is exhusted by labour.
There are so many inspirational stories on here about labouring with confidence and i hope next time i can learn from them!!
I think you did an awesome job Beck! You did what you needed to do to get through it, sounds like it was very intense and everything that happened afterwards must have been scary I think you kept it together really well.
By the way, if it makes you feel any better I still have a numb spot on my toe which I have had since I had DD and i didn't have an epidural so maybe that wasn't the reason for it...
You did great - and Grace is divine
You did an amazing job and to deliver your baby girl , and then go through surgery without being under a GA, WOW! Thankyou so much for sharing, one of my Baby Buddies!!! Grace is just the most adorable little girl, just adorable!
I held DD for a couple of minutes on my belly before she was whipped away and I didn't get to hold her for another 15 hours, so I completely understand the fear of seeing your child for such a short amount of time and then they are no longer where they should be
What a well written birth story, and something to share with your daughter when she is older.
I think you have coped very well with what you went through, and you have a beautiful daughter to show for it.
Reply With Quote
Registered User
Finally, Graces Birth story. (long)
)
so she dragged her own heart specialist in and i was made to lie on the bed during contraction and keep still so they could get a good reading! (2nd
"well, lets make the best of this" she had my epidural turned down so i could feel the contactions a bit, i asked her to take it out but she explained that the sudden hit of pain would be too much. I could feel legs abit now and managed to move around a bit more.
I was told i had lost almost 2 litres of blood and had a tear in my cervix! but it was fixed now.
maybe that wasn't the reason for it...
, and then go through surgery without being under a GA
Bookmarks