Arrival of Stirling - unsuccessful VBAC but positive experience overall - long
I had an emergency c-section with DD (DD's birth story) and had planned to have a VBAC this time. Here is the story (is a little long)
17-JUL-11 - Due Date
1:30 woke with a pain, went to loo tried to get back to sleep.
2:30 woke again thinking maybe that was a contraction got up for food ( did wonder if could be in my mind because I really wanted him to arrive that day his due date). I did not feel like food very odd for me - started to time the 'feelings' on my phone. 6 mins apart about 1 min duration, also had to keep going to loo (ones and twos very frequently)
2:30 - 5:30 - admitted to myself they were contractions and kept a record of them over the few hours they increased in frequency to about every 4 mins and in strength too. I bounced on fit ball, pottered around getting together stuff that I should have already had packed, found sitting down through contraction very difficult, and going from sitting to standing also difficult so spent most of time stood up.
5:30 decided I should wake up DH as probably should go to hospital. Woke up DH who started running round like was going to have baby any minute - rang hospital who said yes to come in.
Trip in car was not great - but only about 12 mins so only had to suffer three contractions sitting down (I was sort of pleased because last time I coped fine in the car and that was probably a sign that things were not advancing as should have been). So by 6:30 we were there in the delivery room - really massive room used to be a post-natal with three beds (the set up had all changed at Birralee since first birth).
Had a VE was at 4 cm which was pleased with, and then had to have the 20 mins of monitoring which took a bit longer due to bubs sleeping. During this time midwife who was going to be looking after us arrived - Caroline who was lovely. Contractions still about 4 mins apart 1 min duration. Got hooked up to a different monitor so could stand up (hospital policy was for continuous on VBAC and as long as I could move I couldn't care less). Time moved on contractions getting stronger and more intense but they still felt good like they were working, I tried sitting on fit ball and kneeling over bed, and laying on side for short periods just to give my legs a rest as they were starting to get tired but nothing was as comfortable as standing up.
I started getting a fair bit of pressure in my bottom probably around 11:00 AM, and had another VE and my waters broke. I was only 6-7cm so a way off pushing, the contractions ramped up and were every 2-3 minutes, every so often I would get one that gave me the urge to push but I resisted, they started feeling a bit different like all they were doing was giving me a pushing urge and not anything else (hard to describe but with previous labor I got to point where contractions just felt like weren't doing anything but being painful and was at this point cervix stopped dilating and started swelling that time) - I tried to convince myself was imagining it as didn't want to spook myself thinking it was going the way of last time. The urge to push was getting harder and harder to resist but it didn't feel right to push either. I asked the midwife for a VE but I wasn't optimistic, she said she had trouble telling exactly but there was definitely still a lip on at least one side, I remember saying "but I have progressed a little haven't I?" and she was very positive but I think was just trying to buoy me up. I knew the obstetrician was coming round in half an hour so decided to give it until he arrived to decide on anything, but decided I would need the gas just to make it until his visit. The gas helped a little but things still didn't feel right and I was still getting strong pushing sensations. The ob turned up did a VE and I was only 6-7 still and my cervix was swollen - so things were turning out just like they did with my DD albeit I was a little further along. At this point I said I wanted a c-section, I knew I didn't want to keep trying for hours and hours and then end up not being able to remember the birth due to tiredness (what happened with my DD) - and the way the labor had progressed was just so similar. The OB said it was worth trying an epidural as could then top that up for the c-section and would take a couple of hours to organise the c-section anyway, he said that there may be a chance that the epidural would relax everything enough to allow dilation to continue (he said it was a small chance but as we would be waiting anyway was worth a try) - I agreed but I was not hopeful, but I needed to do something as was concerned about giving in to the pushing when not ready and doing damage. Having the epidural was hard trying to get through the contractions and stay still but once it was in, it was great I could still feel the contractions but at least the pushing urge had diminished significantly (last time couldn't feel anything once had epidural). After an hour and a half ob came back rechecked me and I was still the same but cervix more swollen, and he also confirmed that bub was posterior (I hadn't had any back labor, but DD was the same) and said theater would get me in within the next half hour.
The c-section was great - this time I knew everything that was going on and everything was explained and everyone really nice. First thing that happened was the OB, pushed bubs head back up so no longer stuck and would be easier to get out. A bit of tugging and they lifted Stirling out, he cried immediately, was taken over to the table, and DH cut the cord (well was already cut but they got him to cut it shorter) - I could see everything that was happening. Everyone kept saying how big he was (wasn't weighed till much later but was 4.36kg). DS was brought over, and placed next to my head and DH next to him, while they did most of the sewing up. Then he went with DH and the midwife for maybe 10 minutes while they finished up and then I met them in recovery, where we had skin to skin and first breastfeed - this was great and didn't happen with my DD because c-section was in middle of night and they didn't have a midwife spare to be in recovery with me so the baby wasn't allowed. I was only in recovery for about 40 mins then to the ward.
So I didn't get the VBAC I had wanted, but I did get my main objective which was to be awake and 'present' for the birth, and the c-section was as good an experience as could have hoped for. I knew before going into labor what I would do if things were going the same way as with DD, so the decision was easy for me to make, and I am not disappointed - I wanted to give it a go and I did, but was not meant to be. We are not planning to have anymore, but the OB said if we did next would be a Caesar, and I would be happy to go for that as the labors were so similar for DD and DS, I think the chances of another being the same would be high.
Thanks for sharing the story of Stirling's birth. Although you didn't get the VBAC you had hoped for, I think the most wonderful thing was that YOU were in control of Stirling's birth. You trusted what your body was telling you, and you knew what needed to be done. I'm thrilled that you got the "present" birth that you were after!
PS. It's not your fault that your babies insist on being little genius's with lovely big heads destined for great and amazing things
Arrival of Stirling - unsuccessful VBAC but positive experience overall - long
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