My waters broke at 10pm on Wednesday 18th Feb, with no signs of labour. I had an appointment the next morning at 9.30 at the hospital. I ended up being admitted in hospital after they checked bubs heart rate with a CTG machine and did an ultrasound to check the fluid levels around bubs - both of which were fine.

I was told I would be induced on the Friday morning and was put on oral antibiotics to ensure there was no risk of infection.

The story below is what happened on the Friday, once the induction started at approximately 9am, with my MIL and DH as support people. Bubs had not engaged.

They hooked up the IV and put me on a monitor, and I spent the first 2 hours laying on my side on a hospital bed, waiting for contractions to start. Contractions started about 11 am and the sytocin had been doubled (roughly) about every half hour from a dose of 12. The rules were that I was to have up to 4 contractions within a 10 minute period (this was monitored by the CTG machine), 5 or more contractions would see the dosage cut in half.

I eventually ended up on a birth ball, which I found to be really comfortable to lean up onto the bed with. I ended up with DH and MIL sitting around the bed. They were doing their best to distract me and were chatting between themselves (which I didn?t mind). When I had a contraction they would respect my need to breath through it and were there to hold my hand or rub my back as needed. The midwife came in and out during this time to check the CTG machine and to see how my contractions were going. At about 11.30, she said to me that it would be best if I didn?t have anything else to eat, just in case we needed a C-section. I was a little confused but trusted her implicitly with her advice.

At 1.30pm the doctor asked that the midwife perform an internal to see how I was progressing. I was dilated 1cm, although she couldn?t get her finger through the cervix. I was however progressing nicely with the drugs and found that the contractions were coming quicker when they ramped up the drug, but quickly settled into being regular 4 in 10 minutes. It was around this time, that I started to dislike the contractions and found that I had to breath my way through them. A wheat bag was heated and put on my back. I was still on the birth ball and when I found this tiring, I went back to lay on my side on the bed. The midwife called in a doctor to check on the CTG machine. WE had been told that bubs was showing some signs of not liking the contractions, which was not unusual, but she was keeping an eye on it. The midwife asked me to go back onto the bed, and she sat by the machine and monitored when my contractions were coming. The machine was not accurately reading when my uterus was contracting, so it was difficult for them to be measured, for some reason.
I was just moving back to the birth ball, at about 2.30 when the midwife came in and told me that the doctor wanted another internal exam. But it wouldn?t need to be conducted for another hour or so.

3.30pm (ish)
The midwife told me that she felt that I was not going to have a vaginal delivery and that it would most likely be a c-section, as bubs was not coping with the increase in the contractions. The midwife removed the syntosin from the drip and we waited for the doctors to arrive to pass their judgement.
Four doctors came into the room about 10 minutes later and I had to move from the birth ball back onto the bed. I was put back onto the drip at half the dose I was on before (I felt like I was going backwards and that it would be forever before I got to hold my baby) and felt the contractions starting to come again. This time they wanted me to move from left, to middle and then right side during the contractions (which was not fun). This was so they could determine whether it was my position that was interfering with the machine readings or if bubs preferred me being in one spot or another. It didn?t seem to matter what position I was in, bubs heart rate went down during each contraction regardless of the position. When his heart rate went down, it was taking longer to recover after each contraction. As labour progressed there would be less time for his heart to get back up to speed. His heart rate dropped down to about 89 and my contractions were at the 4 in 10 minute stage (and I hadn?t even dilated).

All during this time, bubs still had not engaged, and there was some concerns that his cord could be either in the way or too short.

Another internal was conducted and I was 1cm dilated and the finger could go into the cervix. This occurred during a contraction (which was not a lot of fun).
A decision was made to tickle the babies head to see if this increased his heartrate, so another internal was done about 5 minutes after the previous one. Bubs heart rate did increase but they were concerned about his oxygen supply. If bubs had been further down, and my cervix open they could have done a pin ***** test on his head to see if there was enough oxygen. Unfortunately this was not an option.

I was told that part of the ripening of the cervix was that bubs head would come into contact with the cervix and this helped to open the cervix (or maybe this is just the way a labouring women remembers what is told her).

At about 5pm, after the doctors had told us that they weren?t sure but bubs was definitely not happy with the contractions, but the choice was ours, but they were suggesting a C-section. They left the room for a few minutes and DH and I cuddled (as best we could). I started to cry ? I was tired, emotional and concerned that our bubs would not make it. I was overcome by the situation and just wanted to hold bubs in my arms ? regardless of how bubs came out. I looked at DH and he looked at me and we both said ?c-section it is?. The midwife was wonderful and told me to let it all out, and have a good cry ? which I wish I had.

I had to sign the paper work and was told it was a priority B c-section ? that it would be done in 45 minutes. The rest of the wait became a blur. I remember the second midwife coming in. My midwife, L, was going on holidays and had been evasive all day about when those holidays were going to start. I think she was determined to be there for the birth of Alex. The second midwife had come in to take over from L, so I went to the operating room with two midwifes, because my first one was not going to leave me, while I went through the C-section. I started to cry on the trip to the operating room. L saw me crying and got DH to come up the side of the bed, and he tried to reassure me on the trip to the waiting area. It sort of worked.

I was upset in the waiting area, but it wasn?t until I got into the theatre and a nurse pumped a drug through my canula quickly and without care, that I swore for the first time and then I lost the plot and started to bawl my eyes out. My midwife L held me while they tried to put the spinal block in. My right leg had a reflex kick and they had to start again. It is really hard to sit still while crying your heart out.

I told the anaesthesiologist in the waiting area that I had not had any surgery in the past and I would have thought that she may have realised just how anxious this could make someone, but obviously not. I lost my temper with her and to calm myself started a Buddhist chant, and started to remove from the situation through focusing on a mantra.

I was laid down and immediately felt nauseous, was given something for the nausea and then had to have an extra dose. The room was spinning and I was feeling terrible and overwhelmed and was not coping. DH came in and held my hand, and I was still saying my mantra over and over again. DH had tears in his eyes as soon as he saw my distress and I said to him my mantra aloud and he understood where I was going mentally.

After much pulling and pushing, I heard a cry and I saw DH looking towards the sound. I said to him ?Go? and was about to repeat it when I saw him shoot off the chair and disappear behind the blue screen. A minute or two later, I felt a wet head against mine and my midwife L was pushing bubs against me. She was trying to clean him up a bit, but she was determined that we were going to touch each other if only for a brief minute. DH later told me that she was hovering next to the surgeon and grabbed bubs before anyone else could get their hands on him. DH was allowed to cut the cord shorter, and he got to bring bubs back to the chair and have first cuddle. The other midwife, had our camera and was going all over the theatre to capture images of Alex?s birth for us, which I am forever thankful for.

All I remember is the midwife opening my gown and putting Alex on my chest and covering him over. I thought she was almost standing guard over us ensuring that no one else anywhere near my baby. I remember her putting DH?s hand onto bubs inside my gown and there we stayed until I had been sown up. DH got to hold Alex again when they transferred me across onto the bed for the trip to recover. Alex was again immediately placed onto my chest, and stayed there during recovery. He was held there by the second midwife who was encouraging him to attach to my breast. Midwife L took off via the waiting room once I had got into recover and she had seen Alex safely into this world and safely onto his mum?s chest.

Alex rode back to the postnatal room on my chest and we paused at the waiting room to see the MIL who immediately burst into tears. I think she was as anxious as we were for the safe arrival of bubs. Once we got back into the postnatal room they did all the weighing and measuring which DH helped to do. My MIL got to hold her grandchild when he was 2 hours old (on the way to DH?s chest). DH opened his shirt and cuddled Alex for about 5-10 minutes, while I had a few minutes to myself.

While it wasn't the birth that I had planned, I am grateful that bubs arrived safe and sound. Alex certainly makes all the crap that you go through doing IVF worth every bit of it.