Breastfeeding Beyond 12 months #2

TT40 - I went away for five days when DS was almost two (sunday night to saturday morning), he was having morning, nap, and bedtime most days then - but only two if in daycare - I didn't express or anything (as he never would take EBM - I had never bothered) - I went on to feed him for nearly a year afterwards. I remember I was slightly uncomfortable by the end but nothing major at all. He was mad keen when he woke on the Saturday morning - but according to mum had only mentioned missing "Mo Mo" once. DD finished up at about 21 months ish - but there was no break - she just decided that wasn't interested anymore, I suspect that was due to being pregnant (I would have been about 22 weeks). All children and situations are different but there is definitely hope that it won't be the end, and that you won't be uncomfortable either.

Ok... so i came back and she fed =) was normal straight away. Im happy that it wanst the end then, not because of the end, but because it wouldnt have been her decision to stop itms.
This week tho she has been sick, bad cold, blocked up. She keeps asking for milk as comfort cause she obviously felt yucky. But would attempt and either got a mouthful of snot or couldn't breathe. Resulting in one suck and her pulling off saying i dont want it. Instead she would just have 'boobie cuddles' which had to be bare breast, but she would snuggle.up to it etc.. that was 2 days ago, now she still asks for it, but doesn't even try to suck, just has the cuddles.
Now when she asks, do i encourage her to try? Or only let her if she does. One downside to her weaning is thats how i would get her to have an arvo nap...other people she will cuddle with and fall asleep with, but not me. So i guess the real question is do i want her to drop her sleep...that im not ready for =p

TT maybe she will be happy with boobie cuddles now before bed? I've heard that before, kids who transition from milk to cuddles with the boobie :) One of my friends' sons used to fall asleep with his head on her boob and his hand down her top :lol:

I'm glad she came back, even if it may not continue :hug: Don't forget weaning can mess about with you a bit, so go gently.

Afm, well, I am thinking about walking the same path. Not because DS2 wants to, but because I am getting a bit sick of it. I never wanted it to go this way but I'm just over it. I've been pregnant or breastfeeding for more than 6 years, with out a break, and I am thinking its time to wind it up. It's starting to wear me down too - if I'm not around, he can go to sleep fine, he's fine without me when he gets tired. When I'm around, however, as soon as he gets tired he starts screaming at me for milk. When he's feeding he sticks his hand down my top, which I hate. I try and take his hand out and say firmly "Stop, I don't like that" but he just keeps doing it. He takes hours to get to sleep at night and wakes 2am ish and starts demanding milk. I try and hold him off til 6am ish but it just wears me right down.

I wanted to let him wean when he was ready. But the reality of it is a bit different.

That is perfectly understandable OP. I felt like that when Spock was about 18mths. Which is when I forced the night weaning, that helped, and then made it easier to have control and limit when she feeds through the day. It was hard though, took months to get to where I wanted.

hugs OP. The years do take a physical and emotional toll.

Night weaning, and moving to set times for feeds made it much easier for me to continue feeding. i couldn't handle wandering hands and had to hold hands with the child during feeds. When feeds were cutting down, i found DD needed more physical stimulation. cuddles from dad (not from me, cuddles seemed to frustrate her when breastfeeding changes were initiated by me), back massages, and physical activity - jumping running spinning. DS weaned during pregnancy, and preferred to sit with his back to my chest having a banana. he liked rubbing my belly when i was pregnant to go to sleep, but maybe cos i couldn't handle boobie cuddles.

My DD2 recently spoke her first "sentence"... "Mummy booby me me me couch." I'd been gone for 6 hours volunteering and she was clearly starving - she can really hold out. Her stubbornness will take her far one day.

Im really not enjoying bf Spock anymore. ... we are technically down to one a day, before bed, but she still asks for it at other times, and gropes and plays with my boobs all the time! Tips on gently encoraging her to drop that last feed?

:hug: I feel your pain, I'm fed up with it too. Have you tried talking with her about it? As in "don't do that, I don't like it" when she grabs you.

As for the feed, some things I'm trying is talking about how bugs boys don't have milk from mummy and that I might run out soon. Not really working for me but I'm giving it a go...

Tt40 and op im with you here.

Dd2 turned two today and still bfing constantly throughout the day and night :(

Everyone has said how good she is when im not around but when she sees me she hardly lets me take a break :(

Even at the shops she will be pulling my shirt down and sooking for milk.

So fed up.
Havent had a full night sleep in two yrs and dd2 does not look like she is willing to give up bfing any time soon.

Doesnt help when i still get Dmer with strong let downs throughout the day.

Particularly worse on mondays due to constant feeding over weekend.

Will be going to see a doc to refer me to get some help.

Am. Over. It!!!

Hugs to all of you.

DD2 is down to two bfs a day and once I start to feel sick of the bf, I count to 10 and then take her off. I give cuddles to DD2 when she's upset at the finish of the feed. She always complains, but at least it means we can stop when I'm ready.

DD3 is able to last a bit longer between bfs and I left her to work for over five hours last week. I'd probably be a bit less sick of DD2's bfing if I didn't have DD3 as well.

How did you do it OP? Did you just not offer and he not ask? Or did you refuse?

Ok, i am currently bf so emotional atm...so warning for a grrr post.
But i really am hating it atm.
Last week i took advantage of a crazy roster and told Spock no more nigh nighs milk. I convinced her we needed to start saving the milk for baby. She was happy with this and does explain proudly that she is keeping her milk to give to baby. So she has now done a week of no milk before bed.
Naps tho, the only way i can get.her to.sleep is bf her. Or take her for a drive. But i worked out days im not working or we arent out doing something is only 1 or 2 days a week. So i can deal with bf her to nap 1 or 2 days. Which is happened over the last week, she had some last fri, tues, and now.
Im so torn cause. Whenever im not feeding her im loving her still being bf, and think why am i being cruel and holding it from her. But now.as.she bf to.sleep (asleep within 5mins too) i just HATE it. It must be the dmer. But i feel.ive never loaved anything this much my entire life!! =(

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Ok, i am currently bf so emotional atm...so warning for a grrr post.
But i really am hating it atm.
Last week i took advantage of a crazy roster and told Spock no more nigh nighs milk. I convinced her we needed to start saving the milk for baby. She was happy with this and does explain proudly that she is keeping her milk to give to baby. So she has now done a week of no milk before bed.
Naps tho, the only way i can get.her to.sleep is bf her. Or take her for a drive. But i worked out days im not working or we arent out doing something is only 1 or 2 days a week. So i can deal with bf her to nap 1 or 2 days. Which is happened over the last week, she had some last fri, tues, and now.
Im so torn cause. Whenever im not feeding her im loving her still being bf, and think why am i being cruel and holding it from her. But now.as.she bf to.sleep (asleep within 5mins too) i just HATE it. It must be the dmer. But i feel.ive never loaved anything this much my entire life!! =(

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Sounds lie a tough one TT40.

OP is it pretty common for mumma's to get mixed feeling at some stage about BF?

AFM- DD is almost 2 and is showing no signs of stopping BFing. From early on DP would also settle her to sleep so that's given me a lot of flexibility. Some morning when all she wants to do is feed, ( and sometimes if she wakes in the night) I tell her "boobies almost finished". When she was younger, I'd take her off after a minute, but now she takes herself off.

I do think and wonder about when we stop BFing and if it'll be me initiating it or DD.

She will have naps for other people (dh, my folks etc..) by just sitting/laying with them on the couch. But not for me. But that's ok, cause technically I had the easiest quickest way to get her to sleep. It's just hard now when I want to wean but she still desperately needs the nap, she can't not have one.

TT40 just letting you know you are not alone.

Ive got a referral to see karitane for help.

DD2 is totally fine without me and settles herself but as soon as im around her its constant bfing. Even at night i have not had a fulls night sleep because she is on me all night long.

My dmer hasnt settled either :(

Just want my freedom back and be able to eat dinner without her hanging off my boobs.

Tt40 i give u the hugest biggest hugs

if you are on fb there is a group called Nursing Aversion / Breastfeeding Agitation Support where you might find others struggling with breastfeeding.

How are you going TT40?

DD turned 2 yesterday and I must say that I'm doing a massive happy dance to still be bf with low supply. I wanted to reach 12 months but now we've doubled that and still going strong.
Yay!!!

Hey FL, that is so awesome!!! Go you!!!

Ive manged to cut out the nigh nighs feed...and by cut out i refuse when she asks that sometimes she is ok with other times not. She is taking longerbto get to sleep tho now without it, even tho i still spend as long with her in out bed time routine.
She will have a feed during the day kow 3 or 4 times a week. She im ok with as its when she really needs it in terms of being tired or just needs to regroup. Id struggle so much more if i didnt give her it. I still want to drop.it, but atm it is the better of 2 evils

Congrats FL! And TT40, the only way I can continue to bf until they self-wean is by cutting out night feeds.

Still going with DD2 and DD3. DD3 is my least enthusiastic bfer. She only takes what she wants and will flatly refuse if she's distracted or just not super hungry. She devours her food - my other kids were good eaters but she is nuts! She's clearly never heard "food is fun until you're one"! She's 9 mths.

FL, you're awesome. Fantastic effort - seriously :)

TT, I'm so sorry I missed your post earlier. It is really natural to have mixed emotions about everything right now... Things are so up and down for you in so many areas and you've got all those wonderful hormones to add to the mix!

When I weaned DS2, we had a crappy ending. I wanted so much to have this beautiful ending to my bf journey... We had what I thought might have been our last feed and it wasn't nice, so I thought "one more, first thing in the morning, so I can have a nice lasting memory of feeding".

Well he woke up at 2am, screamed at me, kicked me, whacked me until 6am when I caved and fed him, he wriggled and kicked me and DH the whole time he was feeding (not trying to kick us, just from so much wriggling around we were getting whacked with his feet), he was only on for about two minutes and then wrenched his head off and demanded rice bubbles.

So yeah, that was my last feeding experience. Yay me.

So I get what you're going through, sort of anyway. Something that you treasure is turning out not so great. I feel for you. I wish I could tell you it's going to stop, but you know as much as I do that it may not. It'll get better. One day, some day, things will improve. :hug:

Thanks folks. It certainly feels like a great milestone.

"Mummy, i would like to attach and have a little sip please"
How the hell am i meant to refuse that?!

tt40 - that is too cute... I would not be able to refuse that!

keep meaning to pop in here, ds will be 15 months this week & bf's about 2-3 times a day atm. I am ttc atm with an ivf transfer scheduled for January, so he will need to weaned before then bc of the immune drugs I will be on. I am secretly hoping for a natural conception (unlikely as ds took 6 years to get here), so that we can keep going as we are. ;)

I've just realised I belong in here again! DS turned 1 on the 21st of October.

Feeding him is different than it was with DD. I've wanted to quit many more times with him than with her. There's been pain and frustration. But we've come through it all and it's great. In some ways he's not as dependent on it as she was, he won't accept expressed milk so since starting daycare he's been doing full days without it - just morning and night. He still feeds to sleep and he's attached for a lot of the night.

He still seems like such a little baby to me, I'm always so surprised when people are surprised we're still breastfeeding!

Yay Teeki! You go gurl