Breastfeeding General Chatter #13

Hi Tel, wow - you are so organised :) Your ticker says 7 weeks pregnant and you are already thinking about the whole BFing thing. Good on you! In no way do I pretend to be an expert at this but from what I have read, the amount of milk you can express has no reflection on the milk you are able to supply for your baby. I believe it is about building supply in the early days and establishing a good supply from the get go. This means lots of feeding with your newborn. I second the idea to contact the ABA, there is lots of good advice available. Good luck and congratulations on your pregnancy :)

How is everyone else going? I am still breastfeeding and DD is showing no signs of cutting back on her milk despite starting solids - baby led style. She did go on a BFing strike and would only take EBM from the bottle but that only lasted about 4 or 5 days and she's back with a vengance. Her feeds are taking longer than ever and she is feeding alot too. I figure she knows what she is doing so just letting her go with whatever works. With the holidays coming up, I am looking forward to exclusively BFing her and not having to express. Woot Woot

Thanks ladies :-) Will get in touch with them for sure!

OH and thanks about the ticker...will go fix it now!

Hi tel, welcome to BB! I would put bubs to the breast as soon as possible after the birth and then every time bubs even glances in your direction, put him/her straight on. Lots of sucking and skin to skin straight up will get the hormones flowing and help to bring your milk in. You might find also that being your second, your milk will come in quicker this time. Definitely speak to the ABA and an LC as soon as you feel you need some help even if it is just to check your attachment.

As for us, we are going well. DD will be one on New Years Day and I am so happy that we still breastfeeding :) She is feeding 4-5 times during the day and once or twice overnight. Still no sign of AF either! I am loving it. Apart from the lack of weight gain issues at the 3-6 month mark, this has been relatively easy. With DS I was taking it day by day and this time with DD, it doesn't look like our breastfeeding relationship is going to end any time soon :)

Hi Tel - I also recommend the ABA Breastfeeding Education classes - I didn't actually go to a class prior to DD being born as I wasn't aware of them, but have been a demo mum at several since DD was born and I know from talking to the mums and dads there how useful they found it. On the ABA website under breastfeeding classes - QLD, VIC, NSW have dates listed for classes right through to end of 2011 so you plan ahead and book on one now if you like (I think they say towards end of 2nd tri, beginning of 3rd is quite a good time to attend).

AFM - DD is still feeding twice a day, but since I have been pregnant seems just to want to hold and touch my boobs more than drink from them - she likes to kiss them and say boob - is very sweet. I could do without her wanting to put her hand down my top when we are out and about though.

Hi, Tel,

I second the idea of going to an ABA breastfeeding education class. In breastfeeding as with everything knowledge is power. I thought it was interesting....you said you had "no milk" then mentioned that you pumped and got 40 mls. That's not actually "no milk" It's a very respectable amount of milk! Pretty much all a newborn baby needs at a feed. And as Stranegelk says, the baby will always get more out than the pump. When you join ABA you get a great book - free- "Breastfeeding naturally". There is so much misinformation out there it seems in possible that new mums could work their way through it to successfully breastfeed - a bit of knowledge and support makes a huge difference. Good on you for getting the support you need early on this time

I loved the book 'breastfeeding naturally'! I read it before bub was here and took it to hospital with me. Just having it there gave me confidence that i could breastfeed. The ABA send out a magazine every few months that has some cool articles too.

Why does it annoy me?

I have had a couple of friends/acquaintances lately who have breastfed for short periods but then changed to formula. Both have said "their milk just dried up". I trying to work out why it annoys me so much. I think i wish they would just say 'i chose to FF'. Maybe it's about the spreading of misinformation, maybe it's cos i wish they were given better information, maybe it's cos i want to share an experience, maybe i'm jealous cos of the freedom FF can offer in some circumstances. One of the women was so chuffed at week 2 cos she was expressing and her DH was doing the night feeds and then she could sleep through. Maybe i should have said more, i certainly thought at the time that that was going to damage her supply. The other woman was sure she was going to have problems cos her Mum did, but didn't want to educate herself on BFing before bub was here cos she didnt want to stress herself.

I am supportive of women to choose what works for them, i think it's that their choices don't sound educated, and now they are propogating the theory that milk just dries up and therefore they had no choice.

I totally agree HotI... I am on a mission to get that myth dispelled!

Next week I will have been breastfeeding for 18months... I think back to the days in the SCN staring at the baby who had to arrive 6 weeks early and remember thinking, any milk is good milk... now I wonder what we will do if and when she ever doesn't want milk LOL

HotI! I was wondering who that was.
It annoys me too because misinformation like that sabotages so many mother and baby feeding relationships. For every mum who doesn't really care, there are at least another 10 who do, but if they get ****ty advice or no support....
There was a case recently where a young baby died of malnutrition. Severl of the people quoted in a newspaper article stated that she was feeding well and seemed to have enough milk. One said that obviously the milk just didn't have enough nutrition in it... That annoys me. Who might read that and believe it? That baby weighed barely 300g over his birth weight at 3months. He was not getting enough milk.

But what do you say to mothers? No, you're wrong? It's hard. I don't want to aleniate or criticise, you know?

Well done TK. I remember you back in the early days when I was still feeding DS :D

We are approaching 23 months now... I have been thinking about the concept of weaning a lot lately although neither of us are ready to quit altogether we have began a 'feeds in the bedroom' type deal as a way to discourage constant feeding... we were still at 12+ feeds a day (including numerous overnight) so why do I feel so guilty about bringing it down to 2-3 during the day and 2-3 during the night? I mean, that is a reasonable amount for her and she wasn't even phased, just learnt to take my hand and lead me to the bedroom when she wanted a feed. It has worked so well though and because it means a sort of 'time out' from everything else feeds have shortened as well as lessened in frequency... but the guilt, ugh the guilt -- simply because I feel I pushed it even if it was gently! Just need some reassurance that it was okay to do this even though logically I know it was the right thing for both of us -- her solid intake increased dramatically as well. She still feeds to sleep for her nap and during the night, still allowed to feed whenever she pleases as long as we go lay in bed so really, I mean... that's okay yeah?

HotI - I feel annoyed by breastfeeding ignorance whether it be another mother, single friends, health professionals -- misinformation from any source is harmful to society and I really hope we can work towards dispelling myths! Another part for me is sometimes the tone is quite dismissive of breastfeeding, as though it is pure luck that some people can push through and others cannot, there seems to be no acknowledgement that it can be hard work, that it can take a lot of determination, perseverance and education to 'get it right'. I do feel 'lucky' to be breastfeeding but I don't feel it was simply 'luck' that got me here. I do think though that frequently statements about supply are more to do with the person's own frame of reference and guilt, they don't want to own that choice, they'd much rather it be beyond their control and this is a way to protect themselves. Much of my annoyance is because offering breastfeeding information is often met with frowns of disapproval, as though I am somehow unsupportive because I just want to make sure the person is 100% aware of the options and facts... so I keep quiet, I don't feel safe expressing these thoughts in many places and that is sad.

Jellyfish, I sounds to me like your litle one is fine with the changes. You're still feeding her and providing comfort when she needs it - no need to feel guilty for anything. Breastfeeding has to work for the both of you - it's really ok to make changes if you need to.

It seems really irrational reading it back! I also feel guilt the other way because I held onto such frequent feeding for so long as it gave me huge reassurance when she wasn't eating that she was getting enough nutrients from breastmilk... but now that I've seen how her food intake has increased, it seems as though this is a step I should have taken a while back! Can't win, hey? Eeeeeeeeek, sometimes I feel like I can't trust myself because mothering snuck up on me at the naive age of 20 but that is a whole different story, thanks MadB for indulging my insanity haha.

:

---

But what do you say to mothers? No, you're wrong? It's hard. I don't want to aleniate or criticise, you know?

---

:

---

Much of my annoyance is because offering breastfeeding information is often met with frowns of disapproval, as though I am somehow unsupportive because I just want to make sure the person is 100% aware of the options and facts... so I keep quiet, I don't feel safe expressing these thoughts in many places and that is sad.

---

Both of you have picked on what is frustrating to me. I don't want to make them feel bad, but want them to know there could be options open to them (now or for future children), but i too stay largely silent. Maybe i just start buying friends ABA memberships for their baby showers.

tk and jellyfish, that is so great that you are proudly breastfeeding your little ones.

I went to my first ABA meeting this week. The group in my area was de-funct and so recently they merged it with another one and so i now have events that i can go to. Was quite nice to meet up with other BFing mums.

I am so happy to see this thread back up and running :D I too get annoyed with people that make excuses, if you are going to CHOOSE to use formula then at least own that choice. I am still feeding DD breastmilk and she is 8 months old next week. See how I didn't say BFing? She is just refusing to take my boob these days which is really really upsetting. I offer it all the time still but she doesn't want it, she barely wants milk anymore either and we are pretty much forcing the EBM into her. It's really important to me that DD is getting the breastmilk even if she refuses to take it the easiest way for me. Many of my friends think I am ridiculous and can't understand why I wouldn't choose formula. I feel like I am constantly defending my decision to feed DD and I am still hoping she returns to the breast, even though it's been quite a few weeks now.

I wish there was more education about BFing, I think it's quite difficult to get information if you don't know where you are looking for it and many women are uninformed and make choices that might be different if they had more knowledge.

I was trying the other day to think of is there any other situation quite like breastfeeding - where it is so difficult to offer advice on - but on the opposite side no one has any issues with offering those who breastfeed "advice" about formula.

In the main I don't say alot in any discussions about BF vs FF, but if I do I try to get the information across by it being part of some information about my situation, or a close friend - often people listen to what others do and take that info on board, whereas as soon as it sounds like advice it rubs up the wrong way. E.g. My DH is an expert at hanging out the washing in the best way to get it dry - but if he says "why don't you do it like this" I tend to become defensive, whereas if he casually says "I have found out hanging out the trousers this way they dry much quicker" I think oh that is a good idea and do that next time.

Starangelk - Sounds like a very frustrating situation with your DD - hope she decides to go back on boob soon (my DD seemed like weaning a bit towards the beginning of my pregnancy - but now seems to enjoy her one feed more again now - wasn't such an issue for me as she is much older though) - I totally understand why you want to get to 12 months - I would have been exactly the same. (Until I just typed your name in I always thought your user name was "Strange - elk" - whoops sorry :redface:)

HotI - glad you enjoyed your ABA meeting - I got to go to my first one in ages on Friday, and another on Tuesday (no swimming as still school holidays) which is great as since going back to work I have not been able to get to hardly any. Now am pregnant and just feeding DD once a day is great chatting to other mums about their experiences with their seconds.

Ooh I just saw this thread so I thought I'd join in I'll probably vent a bit

Ok well jazzy is bfing and I won't leave her with anyone coz I can't express coz I don't get enough and I don't know if she will take a bottle anyway is that such a bad thing? And SIL says formula won't hurt it will help her gain the weight she needs WTH? I felt like punching her

Hi guys :D
Just coming in to say hi! OMG we are good! So, so so so so good.
That is all :D

Will be back ;)

Me too! I've always read it at strange - lk. only just realised what it actually says. slow much?

Do you think it's pregnancy related maybe? (congrats btw). I know your supply often drops, but maybe the hormonal change is affecting the taste or somethign (though that makes no sense if she's drinking fresh EBM). Have you called the ABA at all? I saw your thread to Barb, but I guess she hasn't had a chance to get on yet.

It must be very frustrating for you :hug: I know sometimes they make the decision to go bottle, but maybe she'll come back. I hope so. Well done to you for continuing with your expressing.

So true wsiwyg! "support" for a struggling breastfeeder = bottle of formula. :dunno:
But yes, actually coe to think of it I have given advice in that manner successfully before. Must remember!

TJ - vent away! but no punching in here, ok?

I love these breastfeeding pics in signatures.... maybe i'll have to get one.