Hi lovely ladies, just looking for some support/advice. I have ebf my girls for 14 months now and it has been one of the most rewarding rollercoasters we have been on with them. However, I am done. I just can't deal with the tandem fighting/pinching/biting/hairpulling/acrobatics any more. I just want my body back and am hating the way I have started to feel when one starts digging around in my top for a boob then wailing hysterically until she gets it only for twin two to start bellowing because she thinks she is missing out. So I really feel just about ready to wean. I have spoken to our local Karitane nurse about this before and she said I will be lucky for them to self wean at this stage, they usually have between two and four feeds in 24 hours and are showing no signs of self weaning. I really hate the sense of abandonment that I get even thinking of initiating weaning, life would be so much easier if they would start it on their own
I feel like I'm in a bit of a dilemma. While I really want to wean, it feels like an enormous psychological hurdle for me to overcome. These will be my only babies. I will never breastfeed again and while I don't want to stifle their development by trying to keep them as babies forever, it feels like a huge step towards their independence (or not being so dependent on me) itms. Then comes my next issue. It may never seem like the perfect time, but there is just so much going on in their little lives and boob is such a comfort to them. E is getting her molars atm so is not a happy camper. G has had ongoing sleep issues which we now think is down to the fact that she has rotten ears and we are waiting for an ENT referral for grommets. She has been in our room since the beginning of the year and we are planning on moving her to her own room in the next week or so. Is it all going to be too much for them, with teething/room change/illness to think of weaning right now, if it means that they are not going to have one of their biggest comforts throughout it all.
I just feel so torn right now yet so exhausted and I don't know the best thing to do. TIA
I haven't fed twins, but have fed toddlers, and tandem fed for almost 18 months, so know the feeling of grabby hands and just wanting your body back. When i had one baby and one toddler, and the toddler feeding was starting to drive me crazy, i began set times for feeds rather than whenever feeds. At first, it was morning, after lunch and bed. There was a bit of adjustment to get to that time, but once it was established I felt so much better, more in control. Continued this for awhile, and then the morning feed was dragging on and stopping us getting the day started, and so i cut that one out by not sitting on the couch and becoming much more active (moving target!) and getting breakfast started. Another trick i learnt (when i was pregnant and experiencing aversion) to shorten feeds was to end the feed with a countdown from 10 to 1, and then say blast-off! and we would both jump up and dance around. Again, it increased the sense that i was in control of my body, but it was also a fun thing for DD once she got used to it.
Just wondering, if setting more limits would make you feel more able to continue to feed, because it would be more on your terms? I did not like the sensation of feeding two kids at the one time, and so always fed singularly. I don't know if this would help you at all, or if it would just increase your time feeding. Is there a special toy, book or activity that the other child could have while one is feeding?
Do you have a similar organisation in NZ? They might be able to put you in touch with another mum of twins who has breastfed more than 12 months and weaned.
Weaning
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