Would you hire a wet nurse?

[blessedatlast]

So, following on from Onyx's thread HERE I was wondering... I know there has been a thread about donated EBM, which I would most definitely be happy to use, but what about a fulltime wet nurse.. I'm not really sure. I think there is a difference between having someone do a fill in feeds for the short term, but I am not sure I would hire someone to feed my baby on a full time basis..

So, your thoughts

[Amaunet]

Yep, if I couldn't bf and the option was available and safe/professional. I strongly believe in the benefits of breastmilk and would do what was possible to give it too my baby. My mum has breastfed a friends child when she was stuck away with a broken down car and she was babysitting

[New Dawn]

if it was ebm then yes as I would still be the one feeding my child iykwim otherwise I would be jelous of their bond....

[Cass72]

if it was ebm then yes as I would still be the one feeding my child iykwim otherwise I would be jelous of their bond....

I'm the same. Seeing someone nurse my baby would, well..... I don't think I could handle it.

[ubba82]

No i dont think i could. Its just too personal. I couldnt imagine breastfeeding another child and wouldnt feel right having someone else breastfeed my child

[blessedatlast]

Thanks so far for the replies.. I think this is interesting, considering it used to be done all the time, back in the day.. Amaunet and New Dawn, - I would happily accept EBM, or let my friend feed my bub on a one off emergency, but full time?? Thats the part I'm not sure about??

[Lisa]

I wouldn't use a wet nurse but I would use donated EBM, however I would feed someone elses baby if they wanted me to.

[RainbowBrite]

I couldn't use a wet nurse...to personal...but I could and have used donated EBM.

[wysiwyg]

If I couldn't BF, I would use a wet nurse - and I don't have an issue with them BF directly - although I would like to feed the bub EBM myself sometimes. I think there are other ways to bond, plus my experience with DD is that she still loves my BB's but doesn't feed anymore, and I can see how happy she is just being able to snuggle into them, so I think the experience of a bub feeding from someone else may then lead to the bub getting the same pleasure and bond from just being close to my BB's even though not feeding with them. With my mum for example you can see how much DD likes to snuggle in, and I have seen her reach out to friends BB's for comfort and I believe there are benefits to the close contact from BF but I don't believe that BF'ing without anything else leads to the strongest bond so I wouldn't feel threatened by a wet nurse. In the animal kingdom bubs often feed from relatives but they still know who their mum is.

[MrsFabuloso]

I would happily accept EBM, or let my friend feed my bub on a one off emergency, but full time?? Thats the part I'm not sure about??

Me too, essentially I don't think I would have an issue with someone being a wet nurse to express milk for me and me then feeding my baby, or maybe some once in a while feeds like if I wanted to go out or something, but definately not full time. The bond of BFing and just even bottle feeding a baby is too strong to me and should only be done by me or my hubby full time.
I would also happily breastfeed someone elses bub though if they needed/wanted me to.
Do you think that's strange though, that many of us have no issues with feeding a friend/family members bub (and hence forming a bond) but don't want our own bubs fed by another regularly?

[Phteven]

If I was rich enough and I couldn't breastfeed my own baby I don't see any reason not to. If you're working long hours in a well paid job and want your baby breast-fed it seems like a great solution to me.
I would imagine that for a single Mum who is breast-feeding it could also be a great job. You could take your child to work with you which would be fantastic. If your responsibilities ended with feeding and didn't include nannying or house-keeping it could be pretty cruisey after a few months.

ETA - thinking about the benefits of breast-feeding.... are there also benefits in being held close to feed?
Also with the concerns about the close bond.... I think that many bottle feeding mothers would argue that the bond is from being a Mum and feeding with love not from using a breast to feed.

[luna moth]

ETA - thinking about the benefits of breast-feeding.... are there also benefits in being held close to feed?
Also with the concerns about the close bond.... I think that many bottle feeding mothers would argue that the bond is from being a Mum and feeding with love not from using a breast to feed.

I'm a breastfeeding mum and I'd argue that. Feeding is just that - feeding. I don't feel any bond from it; the bond comes from our snuggles and play time. Not what I expected at all.

ANd back on topic, if I could afford it, I would. I'd be happy for another mum to feed my baby if there was a reason for it too.

[Catastrophic]

I couldn't.
Breastfeeding to me it's not just about the milk, its the touch, smell, hearing, tasting, its all those sensations that a baby feels, to know that I am their mother. I don't think I could allow someone to do that to my child. It would over step my personal boundaries.

[HotI]

I'm a breastfeeding mum and I'd argue that. Feeding is just that - feeding. I don't feel any bond from it; the bond comes from our snuggles and play time. Not what I expected at all.

ANd back on topic, if I could afford it, I would. I'd be happy for another mum to feed my baby if there was a reason for it too.

If i was bottlefeeding, i would still choose to do all, or the majority, of feeds. I really appreciate those hours and hours that i have spent feeding my LO. Watching her face or having her grab my fingers or top, or have her leg curl around and rest up on my other boob. I wouldn't want to give that up.

[Cherished]

I was just thinking about wet nurses this morning as I was feeding DS! I am not up to date with this sort of thing but I thought wet nurses were a thing of the past? Anyway there is no way I could see another woman breastfeed my baby It would be devestating on so many levels (for me). I would consider hireing someone to express though and I would bottle feed bub. This would also be a last resort. If couldn't BF due to supply then I would do everything to boost my own supply 1st and express my own milk.