Any suggestions welcome....

[misty]

OK. So I am digging my own grave here.

Chantelle is a lazy feeder. It takes her on average over an hour to feed at the breast. During the day this is fine. But during the night, it is not so fine - as she will feed for over an hour at the boob (by which time my nipple start to hurt a little), and still be hungry and thus won't sleep. I have sat there feeding for 3 hours straight one night - and then she woke up an hour later just to start again.

All of my other bubs only ever took 5-10mins to drain a breast, even as newborns. I don't have a supply issue - definitely plenty of milk there, and it only takes me 15mins to express 100mls milk. Chantelle is just a lazy feeder.

So our solution thus far has been for DH to give her a bottle of EBM, whilst I sit and express another bottle for the next night feed. She drinks it all very quickly (in comparision to breastfeeding) and will then sleep for a good solid 4hours at a time.

The only problem is that every morning I then have to battle with her to take the breast. She wants a bottle. It is easier. So for the first feed in the morning, she refuses the breast and fusses and screams and wears herself out. Luckily, I am more patient then her. And once I get her to take the first feed, she is fine at the breast for the rest of the day. But that first feed of the day is involving about an hour of crying or more before she will accept the breast.

So. I am pretty sure the solution is probably to cut out the bottle feeds - at least for a while until she gets quicker at breastfeeding. But I need to sleep sometime, and unfortunately I have other kids to look after, so day sleeps just aren't possible.

Does anyone have any suggestions????

[HotI]

Taking an hour to feed at this age is probably more common than taking only 10 mins. In the early days, that is pretty much all i did. I didn't think my bub was a lazy feeder, and over time she got quicker but still took more than 10 mins. I think you got lucky with your other kids!

I reckon you drop the bottle. She is still learning too, and the bottle is not giving her the opportunity to learn how to breastfeed. Can you lie down to feed so you get a rest as well? Can DH get bub up and change her and bring her to you so you get an extra few mins sleep?

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

I agree with HotI in the fact that taking that long at her age is definitely not out of the norm, both my girls would generally feed from 15-30 min on each side, it would avergae about 45min for me to feed them and that didn't reduce until closer to 6mths.
DD1 was a 'lazy' feeder and would fall asleep at the boob so we did the following: fed her undressed (with a heater on of course), if she fell asleep i would sometimes run a cool cloth over her, would change her in the middle of the feed to wake her up - this assisted her in feeding and to stop falling asleep but as previously mentioned she still fed for longer periods.

I personally would drop the bottle, lay in bed and feed her and see how you go - i know it's hard with other kids to look after so it might not be as éasy'as that but i'm sure you will find something that works for you.
Have you thought about seeing an LC to check if there is something different with her attachment or something?
I've prob been no help but wanted to let you know its not uncommon and your prob doing everything perfectly right anyway.

[Catherine]

Hi Misty,

xoxo you sound like a great mum.


Do you think you could try using a cup or spoon instead of a bottle for the EBM?

She sounds similar to my DD (who was thankfully my first), and by a month old I caved and introduced a dummy. She was rather small (2.6kg, full term and healthy, just small), but I don't know if that has anything to do with it (I just thought small = small mouth, small tummy...). Before a month old introducing a dummy is not recommended because of the possibility of nipple confusion (and I guess the reaction to the bottle is a sign of nipple confusion?).

In light of tiredness (and as an experienced mum you probably already know?): be aware of your attachment, and possible damage to your nipples from the lengthy feeds.

xo
Catherine

Otherwise, I guess if you ditch the ebm night feed, it might be a few more weeks of sleep deprivation before she speeds up. She is only 11 days old...it is wonderful how patient you are.

Do you have anyone that can help you out with your older kids?

[misty]

sigh.

I think you are all right. I am probably going to have to drop the bottle feed.

Regarding the feeding time - it is about an hour at a time that she feeds during the day. At night time, an hour is about where I give up and give into giving her the bottle. When I haven't given up, she has gone on sucking non-stop for 3 hours (at which point I did give her to DH to hold because I was about way to tired and my nipples had started hurting). I was still able to express 75mls after that 3 hours feed. If I only had the one child, this wouldn't phase me - I would nap during the day when she sleeps. Unfortunately, that just isn't possible with 3 other young kids to keep an eye on.

Unfortunately, She won't feed lying down. So I have to be sitting up to feed her. Her attachment is perfect (when she is not refusing the breast). She is constantly sucking when attached - but her sucking doesn't seem very strong.

I am certain that she will get better and quicker at this feeding thing as she gets older, It is just trying to find that balance now between giviong her time to get there and getting enough sleep myself to function as a mother to the rest of my kids.

Oh well. Even if I end up with no sleep, I guess it will still be easier then dealing with the reflux DD1 had when she was a baby....

[Barb Glare]

Hi,

Congratulations on your new baby. What is she now? 11 days old? Just on her L-plates still. I wonder, how did the birth go? Is she full term? How big was she when she was born? Was she separated from you at all? Was she jaundiced? All these factors will have an impact on how your baby feeds. It is just early days for her. Babies are born to breastfeed - and would if they could, but sometimes factors make it difficult. If we can work out why she is taking so long we can offer some suggestions to help. "Lazy" seems rather a harsh term for a newborn. (Sadly I often do hear hospital staff use this term)
The great thing is, you are keeping up your supply and she is getting fed. Pretty soon she will be feeding at the breast like her siblings did. Does she have both breasts or just one? Looking forward to your answers

[Miss E]

My DS was quite similar... He was jaundiced to begin with and a sleepy bub so that also affected the breastfeeding thing.

After a couple of weeks I found that if I let him have 30 mins on each side it worked far better. I read somewhere that even newborns should be able to drain the breast after 20 mins and sometimes they just continue sucking for comfort I'm no expert...

But I did find that if I took him off the first side after 30 mins, changed his nappy and then popped him on the other side for another 30 mins he was satisfied (mind you, he would've happily stayed for much longer if I left him on). So yeah, it did take an hour to feed (and I think it was like this for at least the first 3 months), but after the hour he was nicely milk drunk. Not sure from your post, you could be doing this already, just thought it wouldn't hurt to share.

And, also I just wanted to say - you're doing an awesome job! I couldn't handle 3 hour feeds in the middle of the night either, don't think anyone could.

[misty]

Hi,

Congratulations on your new baby. What is she now? 11 days old? Just on her L-plates still. I wonder, how did the birth go? Is she full term? How big was she when she was born? Was she separated from you at all? Was she jaundiced? All these factors will have an impact on how your baby feeds.

Birth went extremely well, and bubs was up sucking straight away. We weren't seperated at all. No Jaundice.

It is just early days for her. Babies are born to breastfeed - and would if they could, but sometimes factors make it difficult. If we can work out why she is taking so long we can offer some suggestions to help. "Lazy" seems rather a harsh term for a newborn. (Sadly I often do hear hospital staff use this term)
The great thing is, you are keeping up your supply and she is getting fed. Pretty soon she will be feeding at the breast like her siblings did. Does she have both breasts or just one? Looking forward to your answers

I don't like the term 'lazy' either. And truth be told, she isn't lazy - she is just very slow. I have been swapping breasts in the middle of the feed just to see if she will start sucking harder/better from the other side: although there is still a fair bit of milk in the first side, and she would happily stay on the first side for the entire duration. She is much smaller (size) then any of her siblings ever were (she is 3kgs), and her mouth is much smaller; so I have thought that this may be the reason for her being slower, and that as she grows she will find it easier - I have very large nipples that she can barely fit in her mouth.

DH and I have decided that for the next few days at least (he is off work until monday) we will not use the bottle at all and see how she goes at night. We will decide from there what to do next.

[OceanPrincess]

Misty, no words of advice other than what has been posted above, but I just wanted to say best of luck for the next few days

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