I'm happy to keep breastfeeding, but how do I deal with....
...the constant DEMANDING for feeds? Particularly in public situations?
I'm starting to get really annoyed with ds2 demanding feeds from me, when they are not necessary.
This morning I breastfed him, gave him breakfast and a drink, then went out for the morning. While I'm trying to have a conversation with people, he is constantly at me, in my face, whinging, tapping on my breast and demanding to be fed. as i have said, he had just had a breastfeed before we left home so he definitely did not need it.
i can cope with still feeding him overnight. i don't mind giving him a long feed before bed and in the morning, but honestly, i can't stand the constant begging and demanding when i'm trying to do other things. it's starting to really upset me. i ended up having to leave where i was and come home because he was just at me so much that i couldn't enjoy myself. i'm tired of pulling my boob out and him having 2 sucks and then not really wanting it, then going off and doing something, than coming back a minute and a half later and demanding it again. how do i deal with this?
Maybe always have a cup of water or even milk with you to offer instead?
My DS went through the same. A few months later though, he had better things to do than have a feed when we were out & about, unless he was really tired & grumpy.
He was too busy checking everything out to worry about boob! Hopefully your DS will get past it soon... though a friends DS at nearly 2 still does it... Mostly at home though, lol.
thanks clover
i always have a bottle of water and a bottle of milk with me. when i give it to him he hurls it at me with full force and then arches his back and has a full tantrum on my lap. he's doing my head in
DD is demanding too, but im at that point that i just refuse to feed her all the time, i try and stick with what im happy to offer and that is after brekky, before day sleep, around 3.30 then before bed, she asks for it all the time still but is getting used to me refusing. i find distraction the best thing... we go and do something else instead...
The only thing I can think of is distraction.
Is it a recent thing or ongoing? Maybe he's going through a clingy, need-to-reconnect-with-mum (constantly) stage...?
it's really getting me down. tbh, i'm finding it quite embarassing when i'm in a group of people.
he's always been clingy and whingy. i guess it's just becoming more directed at my breasts than just at me as a person itms? like he's always been one to follow me around and hang on to my legs and want me to hold him all the time, but now it's becoming quite aggressive with him headbutting my breasts and tapping on them while i'm trying to have a conversation. i feel like i can't even have a life anymore, i am just a cow.
We've had times like this too Ginger - it is very overwhelming. DS has largely grown out of it now.
I suspect his more aggressive attitude may be a response to your desire to pull away. Will he settle for cuddles/kisses/songs/stories or something else? I found DS often just needed a quick recharge. If I droped what I was doing, sat with him and read a story or somethign, he was happy to go off and do his own thing for a bit.
I do completely understand your need for space And I agree, it's not really about milk, it's just the way his need for mummy is expressed at the moment.
Sorry I don't really have any helpful advice. DS was anxious and clingy, but it didn't manifest in this way. I hope he eases up on you soon
It doesn't matter whether you are breastfeeding or not - but for a while at least you will have to put up with *this* or something like it. For you, now it is the breast. But it's not really about breastfeeding. Children who aren't breastfeeding want...a drink....food....their bottle...dummy...the other child's toy...a biscuit....And when they can't have it, there's a fair chance that a tantrum will ensue. It's what they do.
There are a few stratefies that work. Make sure they are fed and watered. When their blood sugars get low they snap easily (and so do we - so make sure you eat and drink well) And distract, distract, distract. Always have something else up your sleeve. A drink, a toy that they don't have access to much (so it's special) You can talk to them and explain they can't have breast when they are out. It will work to a point. You can pain a confident smile on your face and feed them. You are doing something good for them, you are educating the community and you are buying yourself some peace and quiet for a chat with a friend. Tell him you don't like what he's doing (how will they know if you never tell them - all they see is you are getting narky for no reason) Harden up to tantrums - it goes with the territory of toddlerhood.
And....honestly....for clinging read "well adjusted" *Demanding* will stand him in good stead for the rest of his life. In school he will be in the front row with his hand up asking "why?" He won't be fobbed off or put down. I know. I have one of my own....
Actually Ginger I did think of something - how much quality me time do you get? Taking some time out to recharge yourself would probably help.
It's hard to do sometimes, and I haven't been good at doing it for myself in the past, but it sounds like you need it
I'm happy to keep breastfeeding, but how do I deal with....
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darl i know how you feel!
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