:hugs: Just wanted to say I understand how hard you must have it, although I was lucky enough to have DH here for support.
Ive really struggled with BF, and Im so proud of each day/week/month that I make it. but I also understand that if I have to give it away (which has been medically advised) that a fed baby by any means is a happy baby.
If you want to try bottles, maybe express for the night feed (I actually express one side and feed one side in the mornings, then use that for a bedtime bottle to help fill up DDs tummy, and so I can add nurophen for her teething)