My little one is 16 days old and we haven't got breast feeding established partly due to the pain factor but mostly now due to plain difficulty of getting him attached properly. I am expressing around the clock for feeds in the hope that I can get BF established in the near future. I'm now seeing a couple of different services to get support for BF but I find that I can do it with the LC support but not when I get home. I just can't get the attachment right. The whole thing sees me just end up in tears.
The stress is beginning to affect the bond I have my bub but I'm not ready to give up on BF just yet. I"m not sure how much longer I can go on trying to get the attachment right.
Does anyone have any stories of hope for late establishment of attachment? I'm worried that I will have to make a decision of either remaining an expresser or having to move onto FF.
Its so tough in those early days hun but it will get better...have you tried nipple shields? Have you spoken to the ABA? they have a hotline you can ring and maybe you could see a lactation consultant. Hopefully Barb will come in and give you some wonderful advice xx
Sorry to hear you're having a rough time. It can take a while to get things sorted, unfortunately. My DS was the same - always performing well for the LCs
Perhaps you could get a recommendation for another LC? Sometiems you ahve to see a few bbefore you find one who somehow knows just what you need. You can also try the ABA (if you haven't already) - 1800-686-2-686 or in person at your local group meetings.
Have you tried infant-led attachment? Basically you lay baby between your breasts and let him find his own way. They're hard wired to find their way to the breast and latch on and often when things aren't workign well getting back to basics like this can really help. Try this ABA LINK for details.
It can take a while to get things working right. With DS it was 11 weeks before he could attach comfortably and I used nipple shields for much of that time. I hope you get there soon
Oh Lisa B you poor thing. I can so relate to the pain you are currently going through. But would urge you to keep going as it WILL all come together - might not be tomorrow or the next week but it will happen. If you do a search under my name you will see the ridulous numbers of posts I did about establishing breast feeding with my LO and also just how supportive everyone on here was.
I just couldn't get DS to actually suck when he did attach so we had low weight gains and a very sleepy baby that I had to wake to feed. As a result of him not sucking my supply dried up so ended up expressing round the clock to restore supply. Very very tiring but worth it if you want to persevere. The LC I saw also got me to get a script from my doctor for Motillium which helps build supply. You are doing the right thing by seeing an LC and most of them will also give you phone support after they have seen you.
Where I am in NSW there was also breast feeding support groups run by the local health services that I could drop into and I would also suggest contacting the Australian Breastfeeding Association (ABA) they have a 24 hour support line that you can ring for those times that it all becomes too much. Their number is 1800 686 2 686 or 1800 mum 2 mum. They are national. They also have local support groups which meet up on regular basis and when you phone the help line they can give you the contact number for your local leader. If you are suffering pain on attachment it would normally mean that the attachment isn't correct so it might be worth while considering a nipple shield until your baby is a little bit bigger. I used one until DS was about 3 months old.
I would like to think I am a prime example of how perseverence can pay off. DS is 18 months old and we are only now looking to stop breastfeeding. Down to 1 feed in the morning now which I think he is now ready to drop. It really can work and I personally I think it can make it so much more special if it doesn't come easy as you know then that all the hard work paid off.
In saying that a happy Mummy is the best Mummy and they are only little for such a short time so if you continue to try and it isn't working and you find it too upsetting them its the best thing to maybe comp feed or switch to formula. Whatever decision you make will be the right one for you and your special little baby.
Feel free to PM me if you would like to chat more.
Hi,
It is so distressing when circumstances mean your baby doesn't attach well to the breast. I'm sure that if you wanted to share with us there is a *story* behind what you are currently experiencing. It is my firmly held belief (from a lot of experience) that with tme and patience all babies will go to the breast. It often takes time and patience to get to that point - but it will happen. It can help to do some detective work to find out what the problem is, and then enlist some expert help to help you find the solution. Often mums feel like they are in a pressure cooker - having to get it right - quickly. People often tell a new mum *you have to make a decision* - but the fact is, you don't. You have time on your side.
My DS was attaching properly but would fall asleep within a few minutes only to wake not long after and want to continue the feed. Nothing I did helped (like stripping him, tickling him, changing his nappy (or pretending to do so) etc). I decided to express (I had already bought a pump before DS was born) and fed him exclusively from the bottle from about week 2 until he was 2 months old. Then I got sick of the time doubling up (expressing time and then feeding time with bottle) so one day out of the blue (when he was 2 months old) I decided to breastfeed him.
He got it pretty quickly and I just had to get past the pain factor (of the sensitive nipples) which subsided after 3 days. I almost gave up in those first couple of days and would cringe if he came off or before I attached him because of the pain I knew I was going to go through. Sure enough though after 3 days it was much much better and by the end of the week, no pain at all.
We still gave him one bottle of EBM at night before bed.
We continued until he was 7 months old.
So, in summary, my DS just proves it is possible that you can express and feed exclusively from the bottle from such a young age and for 2 months and then reestablish breastfeeding.
In saying this I would recommend that you continue to try to resolve the problem/s and push through (there is light at the end of the tunnel) but if it doesn't work I wouldn't get too upset about expressing. You are still giving your baby your breastmilk. Try to enjoy the closeness that you still have when bottle feeding the breast milk. Afterall, it's still your milk that you are giving them and you still have to work hard to get it.
Thanks for sharing and giving me some hope. I did about 3-4 feeds today using a nipple shield and the infant led style. I'm still not sure if the attachment is correct because bub was very fussy and throwing himself off during the feeds. At the end of most feeds I ended up giving a little EBM. I guess it's a start. I'm also seeing another LC tomorrow so hoping it goes well.
Nes - gosh 2 months on the pump, you are a champ! I take heart in the pain dulling down after 3 days for you.
Clover - 10 weeks, wow good on you for pushing on.
Barb - thanks for reinforcing that time is on my side.
NW3 - I've just started exploring the nipple shield and today did some feeds with it and found the attachment so much easier. I did have a MCHN tell me that be careful because they can use it like a dummie so I still feel a bit confused if it is the right thing or not.
MadB - yes as I mentioned to NW3 I've just started trying with the nipple shields. Lol...yes it always seems much easier when with the LC. I'm trying someone else tomorrow so crossing my fingers...so exxy! Oh, and I've also been doing some of the infant led attachment today and I've got him on but I'm not sure if it is a good attachment or not as he throws himself off after about 10 minutes.
Boomba - nipple shields seems to be a common theme here!
I've been in a very similar situation for about the first 3 weeks of my DD's life. When we were in hospital we were having such troubles feeding, and when we got home, it just got worse, shed scream and scream when we'd try to feed her! Then we ended up feeding with a syringe and that was so bad because shed get so much wind!
(If you want to read in more detail, I'll show you my thread which shows the whole story) We did use a nipple shield, but even then, for awhile that didn't work! We ended up bottle feeding with EBM for a couple days while still trying to BF here and there.
We saw a lactation consultant who suggested to us to do breast compressions while were feeding until letdown happens, and also try shaping the breast in the "C" shape (Check the ABA website, sorry, I can't post a link at the moment)
Somehow that worked? I wish I could explain how and why, but I can't, all I know is that we haven't had to use a bottle since (except by choice a couple times)
If you would like some more info, let me know, and ask me questions and I'll help you in any way I can
At least you are still able to BF, even if it isnt for the whole feed! It will get better Hun, and I know it's the worst thing to hear (I know it peed me off to no end when people said it to me, but it's true!) perseverance is the key! My DD is feeding like a champ now, no shields, no nothing!
Hope - I'd love to read your story. I take inspiration from other people's journey. I've tried some breast compression. When I do it DS seems to choke but when a LC did it in the past it seemed to work. I find the C hold I bit difficult to twist my hand into the position. I'm glad you found somethings that work and I hope the answer presents itself soon for me.
Need some hope right now
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Its so tough in those early days hun but it will get better...have you tried nipple shields? Have you spoken to the ABA? they have a hotline you can ring and maybe you could see a lactation consultant. 
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