I thought we were doing ok..? CHN just told me to try formula :(

[LaDolceVita]

I failed breastfeeding my DS, he was so hungry, I was uneducated and after formula top ups from birth, I stopped breastfeeding him altogether at 6 weeks.

This time around with DD I was determined to succeed, I still am! And I thought we had been, we have had a couple of hiccups, our attachment to begin with wasn't great but we fixed that in the first week, then I was confused a couple of weeks ago about why she was pulling off constantly but would still go back for more then pull off another 15 seconds later, I read alot and figured out it was my letdown so I started leaning back when feeding and we fixed that too! Then her poop started to go green and she started getting really gassy, I think this is because of an over supply issue and/or the course of antibiotics I took just before this started a few weeks ago? I feed her as often as she asks, we have our regular feeds and then anytime she's awake and the slightest bit unsettled I offer more for as long as it takes. I've always been concerned about the length of her feeds, the majority of the time she feeds 10 mins or less on each side and will not take any more out of that breast, to try to fix the over supply issue I have been trying to get her to continue feeding from the same side but after 10 mins she just keeps spitting it out no matter how many times I offer, I check and there's still heaps of milk in there, she never empties me at all and she still hungry so why is this happening? Aside from all this, which I have mentioned to my CHN and Dr's before, they all said she is just a petite little girl and is happy and healthy so not to worry. Until yesterday and today. Went in for her 6-8 week check up yesterday and the Dr says she's a bit smaller for her age than we'd prefer, asked me a million questions about how often I'm feeding her and if I let her finish before I rush back to life etc as if I starve her and says we have to keep an eye on her.. CHN today told me she's not putting on enough weight and to consider formula

We don't know exactly what she weighed at birth because the midwife weighed her with a thick blanket wrapped around her in the birth suite. She said she was 3576 grams. We checked the photos later and realised about the blanket, got her weighed at 2 days old and she was 3100grams. Now at 7 weeks old she's 3900grams (or 4000 on the scales but my CHN takes off weight to allow for nappy, clothes etc..)

So 800 grams in 7 weeks. I feel like crap I feel angry that I was questioning the feeding all along and telling them I was worried and they were blowing it off. I don't WANT to go to formula but of course will do whatever it takes for my little girl to thrive! I'm buying a pump tomorrow to try to express extra to top her up with and I hope that will help and we can avoid formula..

I'm sorry this is s bit disorderly, I'm quite upset and trying to process it all for myself at the same time.. I guess it's part vent but it's definitely more a call for any help or advice from anyone out there who can help with these issues we're having? Why will she continue to spit me out and act full yet not be putting on enough weight? What can I do to fix all this, keep breastfeeding AND have my baby girl thrive? Should I just forget about it and go straight to formula? I feel like we've tried so hard and have come so far and it's still not enough I don't want to fail my baby girl but it feels no matter which way I decide to go that's exactly what I'm doing

[Trillian]

DOn't listen to her. You thought that you were doing a great job and you are! She's put on weight and that's all you can ask for. Maybe try boosting your supply withs some lactation cookies and have oats for brekkie and spend as much time with her as you can feeding and I'm sure she will do beautifully Don't let her *suggestion* get you down. SHe should have been giving you these tips herself and supporting you to keep going, not telling you your efforts weren't good enough. That makes me so angry when an ill-informed comment can make a mum feel like that.

[Purple Penguin]

Try not to let them get to you, just because it was "suggested" doesn't mean you have to do it, it sounds like you were already doing a great job to start off with. Some babies are just small

[LaDolceVita]

Thanks so much Trill, I really appreciate your reply!

I don't think supply is an issue? Even after she's finished I can still literally squirt milk.. I'm never empty?

[~Ash~]

If she isn't ever finishing off one side could it be that she isn't getting the fatty milk and just the watery stuff at the start?

I'm am sure other people know a lot more than I do but I have heard this can be an issue.

I wouldn't be letting it get to you quite yet either - she has put on weight and you sound like you are doing everything you can and a great job!

I'm sorry the nurse was quick to suggest you give up - not cool at all!!


**Sent from my phone using Tapatalk.

[willow5]

Is she happy and settled? Weeing and pooing? She's gained, like Trillian said. She didn't lose so that's got to be good. I'm sorry you're feeling crappy about this I would go see a different CHN or call ABA. I don't think that at 7 weeks with weight gain, not loss is a good reason to switch to formula. If you thought you were doing well then you were! Keep up the great work! I remember your earlier post about your attachment. You sorted that out great, you can get past this too

[Aligater]

I was told at 8 months my little one wasnt leaving hospital till she had a bottle of formula as i was starving her. Put her on formula and made no diferance to her gains or losses. Listen to yourself if your baby is happy and content and you are happy with how things are going keep going. Also most CHN dont know much about breast feeding and if they do they are worth thier weight in gold.

[LaDolceVita]

Thanks PP & Ash.. I think it's a foremilk/hind milk issue too but she just won't keep eating long enough on each side every feed. Some feeds she does and will go for 20 mins on each side, but only once a day if I'm lucky will she feed that long, even only once every couple of days will she feed for that long in each side.. I'm hoping pumping before feeds will help this issue and I hope that's the end of it and she'll start putting on more weight once the hind milk is more easily accessible for her..

[misty]

Tell you CHN to stick it.
You bub sounds just like mine. My bub is right at the bottom end of the growth charts, and I KNOW she is having enough milk, because she gets EBM and formula and beastmilk from the boob - so I have a very good idea of how much milk she is actually getting - but I have still gotten comments about how they 'prefer' to have bubs a bit heavier. Ass if their preference is going to make bubs grow any bigger! I refuse to see my CHN's now, I only go to the drs for everything.

You sound like you are doing a fantastic job.

My questions to you:
Is bubs generally happy?
Has bubs got fat rolls / chubby cheeks / etc?
Does she have lots of wet nappies each day?
Is she having regular feeds throughout the day?

If then answer is 'yes' to all of these things then you probably just have a petite baby. If you have answered 'no' to any of these or are still concerned go and talk to a GP, and if they try to tell you to FF, go and get a second opinion from a different GP (or even a third). They should be weighing bub naked too, and not deducting weight for clothing.

My bub is 4mths old and has just recently gotten over the 5kg mark - she was 3.1kg at birth. Roughly gaining 120g a week on average - But I know in the first 8 weeks it was closer to 90g a week in reality.

[LaDolceVita]

Thankyou so much Willow and Aligater, you're right, she is happy and settled most of the time, she's only 7 weeks so has her moments of course but is mostly settled and happy, a great sleeper and really it's only wind that gets her upset.. I really hope the pumping will help. I'm going to get a Medela Swing tomorrow, I hope to see some results in the next week or two.

Thankyou so much for all of your advice and support ladies, I can't tell you how much I really appreciate it! x

[misty]

Thanks PP & Ash.. I think it's a foremilk/hind milk issue too but she just won't keep eating long enough on each side every feed. Some feeds she does and will go for 20 mins on each side, but only once a day if I'm lucky will she feed that long, even only once every couple of days will she feed for that long in each side.. I'm hoping pumping before feeds will help this issue and I hope that's the end of it and she'll start putting on more weight once the hind milk is more easily accessible for her..

Pumping at the end of feeds and then using that milk for 'top ups' can help resolve any issues like that. But fore / hind milk imbalances are actually extremely rare, and should resolve itself anyway as your supply settles down.

[skybie]

When DD2 had her 2 week check i bawled to the health nurse saying she only feeds for 5-10 mins and only ever from one side, i was so worried she wasnt getting enough, but the nurse said they like to see a weight gain of 120-200gms a week, and going by that rule, your bub is only just just just under that, so i think you're doing perfectly!!
like the others have said if she's happy and settled(as happy and settled as a newborn can be!) not lethargic, plenty of wet nappies ect, then you're doing just fine.
Some babies are just slower at gaining weight than others, DD2 certainly was but even though her weight gains were small she still followed her own pattern on the graph that they use

[Trillian]

Aligater made a good point - what would happen if being put on ABM didn't make a difference to her weight gains? I'd be asking your CHN that if it ever comes up again. I'd be making a point of saying that you could end up ruining a perfectly good breasfeeding relationship for nothing if you make the switch and nothing changes.

[Barb Glare]

Hi,
You have been doing such an amazing job and it is so disappointing and frustrating when you have thought it was all going well/and to have your concerns dismissed. I do hear similar stories a lot. It's really not fair to mothers to tell them to breastfeed but then withold from them the information on how to increase your supply and pressure them in to using formula.
You can sort this out. Tell me, how often does she feed in 24 hours? Make sure she feeds every three hours day and night (not forever, just till she puts on more weight) and that she has both breasts at every feed. Don't worry too much about the foremilk/hindmilk thing - she just needs more milk.
Join ABA right now and go and hang out with women who know what they are doing. Is she pooing much? Or just a little (yes I want to know how many per day and how big they are - I am less concerned about the colour. Increasing your milk supply is generally not too diffucult, so take heart.

[LaDolceVita]

thankyou sooo much Misty, very reassuring to hear of a bub similar! Even similar weights!

My questions to you:
Is bubs generally happy?
Yes, she's a pretty easy baby! Happy except for gassy times, otherwise she's very settled.

Has bubs got fat rolls / chubby cheeks / etc?
No None. Some skin folds on her legs but other than that no fat. She's got a little round belly and some muscle/meat on her bones but no rolls or anything

Does she have lots of wet nappies each day?
Yes, always. And does 2-4 decent sized poops a day as well.

Is she having regular feeds throughout the day?
Yes. Plus a few extras I throw in as well.

[skybie]

Aligater made a good point - what would happen if being put on ABM didn't make a difference to her weight gains? I'd be asking your CHN that if it ever comes up again. I'd be making a point of saying that you could end up ruining a perfectly good breasfeeding relationship for nothing if you make the switch and nothing changes.

DD2 started full time formula at 7 months, and her weight gains stayed the same as they were when she was fully breast fed (and she didnt sleep any better either ;o))

[Malyna]

Master 3 was slow to put on weight. He went from being 50% on the graph to 25% on the graph, but he was always a happy healthy, active BF baby.

He was skinny. No fat but boy did he have buddah cheeks on him!

The MCHN nurse was concerned with the poos and wees for DS and he supplied plenty of them.

Can you get a second opinion?

[Nai]

Dd1 weighed 2.9 kg at birth and gained on average 100g a week. She was skinny and didn't really chub up at all until 3months and then not by much. I fed for 14months, 6 exclusively. She's now almost 6 yo, is happy, healthy, rarely sick and still skinny but exactly the same percentile she always was as a baby. It's her build.

You are doing great, anything over 100g per week is a good gain.