Barb, anyone? HELP! I can't take much more of the biting :(

[Spring Angel]

I really need help.

After overcoming some pretty serious breast refusal in the last month, DS has now taken to biting me. He is 9 1/2 months and he's teething, fair enough, but surely this isn't normal. It isn't just now and then, it is every single time my breast goes into his mouth. It bloody hurts but more than that it is upsetting me because I just don't know how long I can persist.

So far I've tried.

* Saying 'Ouch' or 'No' and stopping the feed and trying to commence a little while later.
* Putting him down on the ground after biting.
* Trying teething gel first to see if it helps.
* Waiting until he is ravenous to offer a feed.
* Hand expressing until the milk is pretty much dripping out so that he doesn't have to even work to get let-down.
* Feeding in a dark room free of any stimulation.
* Feeding out in the lounge room with heaps of noise and stimulation.
* Trying the football hold.
* Feeding while standing and patting, swaying

etc etc

You get the drift.

I'm all out of options. Last night, after being bitten for the 5th time straight I just said to DH I can't do this and defrosted a feed of EBM and gave it to him.

He is currently screaming in DH's arms for a feed but each and every time I try he stinking bites me. I am almost considering stopping feed and expressing up until 12 months then switching to cows milk. I fed my other DS with a full mouth of teeth and he never bit.

The only feeds he does perfectly without biting are the night time feeds. He would have one at about 9pm, midnight and 3am. Other than that he pretty much only gets water during the day because he won't stop using my nipple as a teething toy. Is is ok just to feed him at night and only offer water during the day? He has a wonderful and varied diet and eats whatever we are having.

Tell me there's hope. Tell me I should persist and not just start expressing. Tell me how long I should expect this to continue.

After the breast refusal, now this, it's really getting me down.

Spring xx

[Willow]

OK....I think you've tried just about everything I would have suggested!

It is reassuring that he is still having his night feeds though, that is something to hold on to. I am not sure what the advice would be re feeding at night and offering water during the day so I will leave that up to the experts.

The only other thing I can think of is to TRY (and I KNOW how difficult it would be) not to react at all when he bites. I know, it would be nearly impossible, but maybe it is the reaction he is getting that makes him keep biting? All three of mine have bitten during teething, but not persistently as you've described.

I'm sorry hun, I wish I had some better advice, but I will think on it and come back if I come up with anything. Have you called the ABA helpline?

[Spring Angel]

Thanks Willow. After chatting to you on FB I snuck in and gave him a dream feed which thankfully he took. I'll try and try again I guess but far out it hurts.

[Beach Mama]

I feel for you hun, we had the same thing when J was teething and I tried everything you mentioned. There is hope though, I found that each time I was about to wean him to formula he ended up stopping and feeding properly again. Each time he cut new teeth we went through an adjustment stage and it was sort of like he had to find a new way to feed with the new teeth. I hope it passes soon xoxox

[Spring Angel]

Thanks Tan. It's reassuring to hear that other people have been through it and managed to continue to feed.

[Kmn]

Have you tried feeding during the day lying down? The main advantage is that you can keep him in really close so while he may clamp down he can't clamp down and pull away.

[Spring Angel]

Thanks Kmn

I have tried lying down but TBH he comes at me with his mouth wide open ready to bite so I don't even get a chance to stop him clamping. He doesn't bite otherwise, doesn't bite his brother etc.

I might try lying down again.


Could it be that my period is coming back? I haven't got it back yet but with my other son I got it back at 11 months post partum so soonish.

[Kmn]

Get his ears checked too maybe - if sucking hurts he may be being naughty.
Period coming back should lead to "funny" tasting milk and sometimes slower letdowns - but he's still drinking the EBM, so the taste can't be too bad, and you say that expressing until the let down has happened doesn't help either, so that probably isn't the reason.
From an attachment point of view you want him to be wide open and ready - because the more he has in his mouth the less the dainty bits get bitten. So while it is very counterintuitive, one way of easing biting is to stuff more in!
Have you tried food first and then boob - so he's done some chewing and maybe got that out of his system (and I am clutching at straws here!).

[Spring Angel]

Got his ears checked on Tuesday after another BF mum mentioned ear infections could be the cause. You're right, he is still loving his EBM so the taste can't be an issue.

I read on the ABA website to make sure the nipple is right at the back of this throat with his tounge over his bottom teeth but he does this initially then just sort of slides off clamping and tugging on the way down. I almost see starts from the pain.

I've tried food first, I usually give him his dinner, then bath, then boob then bed.

I really do appreicate your help, even if we are both clutching at straws.

[Kmn]

The sliding off thing can be reduced by lots of propping and cushions - you may have a situation where he starts to slide and then tries to "hold on" with his teeth.
One suggestion for biting is instead of taking him away when he does it literally squash his face into your boob for a few seconds - it stops him tugging on your boob and is much faster to do than detaching. And it's also not real pleasant for bub, so will hopefully make him think twice.

[kelebek]

One suggestion for biting is instead of taking him away when he does it literally squash his face into your boob for a few seconds - it stops him tugging on your boob and is much faster to do than detaching. And it's also not real pleasant for bub, so will hopefully make him think twice.

Doing this also makes it harder for them to bite. We went through many biting phases and some periods seem to last longer then others technically if they are feeding they can't bite due to position, is it possible he really isn't hungry some of the time?

I got in the habit when we were in a biting phase that I would keep my pinky nail short and literally have it sitting at the corner of his mouth ready to break the suction as soon as possible. Often it would be at the end of a feed and he was sucking/biting for comfort (as you said unfortunately the culprit is the teeth)

I hope it passes soon for you

[trishalishous]

Have you tried nipple shields?
I had to use them when DD was newborn, as she had attachment problems, and Im so glad Ive saved them, as at 5 months shes biting too! (Although she only has two tiny teeth so far)

[MantaRay]

Hun, he sure is making it difficult for you, isn't he!! You have done a great job of trying things to get through this. One other idea that might help is to give him something cold to chew on before a feed. It is also important to make sure he is really close to you during feeds. At that age mums generally don't need to pay much attention to position and attachment as their little ones know what to do. Going back to basics and making sure his head is at the right height for you nipple, and that his body is tucked in nice and close to you, can make a difference. His chin needs to be close to your breast and sometimes pulling his legs around so he's tucked in close can help achieve that.

Another tip that has worked for some people I know is to gently push the baby's face into the breast when he bites. This means he has to release the bite immediately, and it's unpleasant so it acts as a deterrent.

Best of luck hun

[Sagres]

Biting is not nice, not fun at all.

Can I ask how long he has been biting. I had several episodes of biting (though not as bad as what you are going through) and all of them were temporary and only lasted a few days to a week. If he has been doing if for 24-48 hours I would say that another day or 2 MIGHT see the end of it, but if he has been doing it for 2 weeks I would be less inclined to think waiting it out might be the answer.

Good luck...x

[Now we're 3]

This might sound silly but if you think it is the teething that is causing the problem is there any point in getting one of the amber teething necklaces and seeing if that eases any discomfort he is having with teething which in turn might mean he doesn't bite. Sounds like you are at the stage when you will try anything.

[Spring Angel]

Sagres: the first bite was late September and it's progressively getting worse and worse. Since then he's cut two teeth and has another right at the surface.

Kelebek: the pinky tip is a good idea. I feel so anxious now when I go to feed him and I'm sure he senses that which makes it worse. I'm so glad to hear you managed to overcome your biting phases.

Trish: fantastic suggestion about the nipple shields. Definately worth a try.

Manta: thank you so much for your suggestions. I tried the gently pushing just then but he just clamps. I can't really explain it, he is just too quick. I'll give the cold teething ring a try.

Now we're3: I had amber necklace but it didn't seem to help. I guess I could put it back on him.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate your support guys.

I snuck in and fed him at 5.30am this morning but apart from that he's had water today. He had 4 feeds overnight. I figure plenty of bubs are sleeping through the night at this stage and not drinking milk during that time so DS can have water during the day and bf over night. It's just my sleep that will suffer. I'm going to keep trying to offer during the day but I'm not going to submit myself to chomping and constant pain. I'll offer, if he bites even once I'll stop. He can have his milk intake overnight.

Spring xx

[onthefly]

The only other thing that springs to mind is studious attention to attachment. We often get a bit slack about it as they get older - he should not be able to bite if he's on 'right'. (ETA - oh, MR already said all this). I think efjay and gigi had some good advice on this topic...

DS did this to me when he was about 1. There were 2 kinds of bites. The end-of-feed nip, which was pretty easy to pick and avoid with a bit of practice, and the all-out, all-of-a-sudden clampdown. It went on for a while. I would stop feeding if he bit me, and no more till the next feed. The last time he did it he drew blood and I told him no more feeds period (but relented at bed time). I guess he finally got the message

Anyway, I can completely understand not wanting to feed like this. I hope he gets the message soon.

[Spring Angel]

The thing is I can't even get my boob into my mouth because he is just waiting to bite and won't really open wide enough. I've tried going back to basics, chin to breast chest to chest I'm even holding his head and guiding it but no luck.

The thing is when I feed him at night his attachment is wonderful and he takes both sides perfectly.

I might actually try to call the lc I saw at the hossy when he was born and see if I can go and and get her to watch my technique.