Oh MG, you're such a bloody gem. You know it's not in my nature to say, "that's great, I'll see you at x time," because I have to think about it 100 different ways first. Let me have a chat with DP - I still think it might be easiest to get DD sorted with a nanny/babysitter because at the end of the day she WILL be fine and it's only for one night. I am currently scheduled for a Tuesday but that could change depending on if they want DD2 out earlier because of my GD. My tummy is the size of a small elephant at the moment
I really, really appreciate all that info and your very kind offer.
I had a pretty bad experience with my c/s and my DH proved invaluable to me at that time. I went into labour that progressed extremely fast but the hospital wouldn't let me deliver naturally so they gave me an injection in my stomach to stop my labour which meant after surgery, I had an oxytocin drip and my uterus was constantly contracting so I was in immense pain. The m/w was pretty non-understanding and made me get up for a shower 3 hours after my surgery which set me back an extra day. I was put into a bed that had a crank on the end of it so I was stuck flat on my back until someone could come and crank it up for me, my m/w also decided that I should go onto eating solids straight away which I was too sick and in pain to do.
DH proved pretty valuable because it was hard and I needed the support. While the m/w was quite horrific the first day, DH got pretty good at standing up for me (I was too sore and out of it from all the drugs to do it for myself). I also didn't want my kids near me while I was like that because I didn't want them to see me in that state and they wouldn't have understood that they couldn't climb all over me.
Because of everything that happened, I needed DH for 48 hours after the birth to help. I didn't want the m/w anywhere near me. He helped me shower, he helped me walk and in the end, he took me home 48 hours after my surgery because when I buzzed, they were too busy to help. He could take better care of me at home.
I guess my point is that your experience probably won't be anything like mine but unexpected things can crop up that you don't plan for. It might be easier to make arrangements to have your DD looked after for the first couple of days and undo those plans if it is all smooth sailing. At least if things do hit the wall a bit, that is one less stress for you. Some people have great experiences with c/s and feel fine very soon after. If this happens it would be easier to cancel arrangements than have to try and make them at that point.
Good luck with everything. I hope your c/s goes really well and your DD can be with you soon after.
Of course! And I don't expect an answer now. But know you have OPTIONS. And you can let me know whenever. If you think it's something you might want, just let me know and I'll PM you my mobile number. Don't worry, I'm not an axe murderer... I may get called Nurse Ratchet but I'm no seriel killer It's your decision to make and your decision will be respected.
Hi Fiona - I had a CS about 5 weeks ago and TBH I could barely do anything for 48 hours. I had mine at 8am and was in bed with a cathader until the next morning. The next morning they took the cathader out and got me up to shower but I pretty much fainted in the shower, later finding out my iron levels were low as I had lost some extra blood during the delivery. So I was back in bed until the following morning. I really only got out of bed in the evening on day 3! My DH had to do everything - change her nappy, bath her, get her in and out of the cot and also keep an eye on me while I was feeding her as I was REALLY quite out of it for the first 36 hours from the drugs and low iron levels. I realise that you can't get up as soon as possible and in reality, I didn't get up for ages either so wanted to share my experience with you. I, like Kate said had a private room and DH could stay overnight BUT if I wasn't out of it, I think I could have raised the bed to cot height and lifted her in and out myself and cared for her that way. I think you will be able to make it work as long as you are able to sit up....... Best wishes.
Hey Fiona, I know you've had heaps of responses already but just wanted to say that I was flat on my back for 24 hours afterwards (unforseen complications of an unplanned c-section). I could feed DS when he was passed to me and that was it. I needed a lot of help from two nurses to get into and out of the shower chair the next morning and moving was very ginger/painful/slow after that. Those beds that are able to mechanically go up and down and raise the feet/head seperately are great. DP was around a lot and so I did rely on him to bring stuff or help with nappy changes/feeding/wrapping etc. DS actually slept a lot of the first day so there wasn't as much to do as I'd expected but I still found my inability to do things like nappy changes for him extremely frustrating. (I didn't mind if DP was doing it, but hated watching nursing staff do things I "should" have been doing itms). I hate asking for help too but also my c-section was unplanned so I had no idea I'd be in the situation I was in.
I think if you've thought ahead about your limitations (which sound like they will continue even after you can get up and move about) and are mentally prepared for needing to rely on others then that is a great start! I found too, that I had to be a bit assertive with the night shift that first night to hand me DS when I wanted to feed. They were trying to tell me that I didn't have to feed him and didn't have any milk yet anyway
I wonder whether putting your specific post-birth support needs into your birth plan would help?
Good luck with your birth. I really hope your SPD takes no where near 18 months to heal this time hun. xx
Thanks starangelk and Kaz - I just spoke to an MG friend of mine who's had two c-sections and she reiterated MG's advice that it's really hard to know how you're going to be as her recoveries were different each time but for her first she barely got out of bed before Day 3 so I'm hardly going to be unusual if I take my physio's advice and do the absolute minimum for 24 hours (even if I FEEL like I COULD do more).
Also came up with a brainwave re the DD situation. Think it might be good if DP stays with his brother/SIL in Melbourne. Although DD does not know them very well, at least that means all three of us are in Melbourne and he could come and go between the hospital and there rather than have to travel up to Woodend and back and be against the clock in terms of childcare pick-ups or possibly leaving DD overnight with a nanny she doesn't know. At least if DD stayed with her aunty/uncle they could bring her in for visits and they would tell us honestly how she was going without mum & dad while DP was helping me in the hospital and he could go back if she was getting distressed. Probably more likely that she will revel in being doted on!
Yeah the unpredictability of surgery recovery does kind of suck (I like to know what's coming lol!). No way would you be unusual to stay in bed for the first 2-3 days. I had a lot of retained fluid and had nursing staff continually telling me to get back into bed and keep my feet elevated lol! Lots of different stuff can happen after a c-section I guess.
Great idea re: your daughter. She will likely feel very special to be looked after like that too which might take her mind off the fact that mum and dad are mostly otherwise occupied those first few days.
Yeah, I won't be making the same mistake about the fluid retention second time around Kaz. Last time I sat in a chair in hospital most of the time but when I got home I elevated my feet. Lost 8kg in one day, I kid you not. I kept going to the bathroom to check and shouting to DP - "I've lost ANOTHER kilo". Very freaky.
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