I know it goes against the grain but if I really thought about it, the method of giving birth really doesn't matter to me. I don't have a deep-seated need to deliver babies vaginally but I think when I joined BB I kind of got caught up in the idea that a vaginal, drug-free birth is the pinnacle of excellence.
My first VB left me with physical pain that I still have nearly five years later (I had severe SPD which was greatly exacerbated by the pushing position I was in for nearly three hours). It meant that I couldn't be the mum I wanted to be to DD - I couldn't get down on the floor to play with her, could barely leave the house for the first six months because walking was so painful etc. etc. etc.
After that, I couldn't care less really about VB versus caesarean - I just wanted a birth that would leave me with the least amount of physical damage. Once again, when I was pregnant with DD2, I got a little caught up in the idea that a caesarean was a 'cop-out'. Indeed, some of the members on here who'd also had SPD, had the arrogance to presume that their SPD must be the same as my SPD and because they had a VB and recovered well, it meant that I should too and anything less meant that I was a bit of a loser.
Luckily, I ignored them and their near-fanaticism and had an elective caesarean with DD2.
I felt better (physically and emotionally) after my caesarean than after my VB. After my caesarean, I felt that I could be the mum I wanted to be.
And, to me, that's all that matters.
Celebrate the way you mother your baby, not how you birthed her. Birth is one tiny part of being a mum. Lovely if it's everything you imagined but really, in the whole scheme of things, not that important (to me).
