Can Child Support do this?

[nothing2lose]

I'm sorry you are caught in the middle of this Tash but as a parent who has received less than $700 total in nine years since separating from DD's biological father, child support is an emotive issue for me.
I have worked damn hard to raise my DD, as has my DP. We have provided everything or her. Why should her biological father not contribute to her upbringing? What gives him the right to shirk his responsibilities? Do I not deserve any contributions from him because I work, or because my DP works? Sorry, I just don't understand that logic.

The scary thing is, a parent who doesn't pay child support for one child is extremely unlikely to pay it for another. Should, GOd forbid, you ever break up with your DH, how would you feel if he didnt fulfil his CSA obligations to you for your child?

Once again, sorry you are caught up in this but you only have your DH to blame. It's him you should be angry at.

[Marley&Me]

Yes, I understand all of it. DH understands all of it too. We are not angry with CSA, they are doing their job. We are upset that we didn't know they would take such a large sum in one go. We know that regardless of custody he has to pay, we know that it doesn't matter what her partner earns either. Dh has just apologised a million times cos he feels so bad for putting me/us through this. He just gets so angry that she has to be so horribly bitter towards him. I can't stop thinking about if she had just accepted that he moved on and continued fortnightly custody all would have been well. It was not right for DH to stop paying and he never denied it. He let his anger get in the way and now it's come back to bite him in the bum.
I am sorry too N2L that you had a lousy ex, they really make the good ones look bad. I imagine for all the genuine hard done by mums it would be so tough with a jerk ex who doesn't pay a cent. (my friend is actually one of them )

I am going now to find a way to get some cash together so we can keep a roof over our heads.

.

[Mildez]

For 8years my ex did everything in his power to ensure I didn't get a cent to assist with DDs upbringing. When CSA started guarnishing his wage he would leave his job and get another and then work for cash in hand etc. It took 8years and 7years of him not doing his tax as I would be entitled to any return before they caught up with him and the arrears were paid which took another 3years. Unless it had been a long time I wouldnt have thought CSA would take $$$ like that without trying other avenues first. It sucks that you have been affected by this.

[trishalishous]

Child support and access are seperate issues - two wrongs dont make a right, he isnt paying to see his child but to help the primary carer raise them

Also irrelevant to bring up their financial circumstances which you can report to child support if you feel it is inaccurate. I mean really, the paying parent gets to pay a capped amount (sometimes not even that )then wash their hands. The primary carer doesnt reach their allotted cntribution then say oh well, thats all you get kid good luck not starving.

There is really no excuse to skip out on the responsibilty. You dont control the other parent but you are in charge of your own actions - why make your ability to do the right thing dependant on another person? If he wants access he should take it up in court not protest at his childs expense.

this x 100

[Marley&Me]

This is not what I was asking about. If you actually read my original comment you will see I never asked what everyone's thoughts were regarding child support payments. I am not justifying lack of payments. i just wanted an answer and I got it. Thank goodness for the unsubbing button.

[onthefly]

Moderator Message »
All good here, yes? Moving along....
Please feel free to start a new thread if you want to discuss something else