It's not about being slack, it's just some kids need MORE yanno? I've learnt talking and saying the same thing over and over doesn't cut it. Like I said it's tiring as hell and not always achievable EVERY time, I honestly think it's the only way. Actions, not just words.

See if you can get your hands on some of the paper rolls from Ikea - they are about 7 metres long! Maybe part of a new wind down routine for DD is 30 mins quiet drawing in her room with some gentle music on? You can make a big fuss about not letting the others disturb her, so she can see you take her very obvious love of drawing (!) seriously.

*sigh, I have no2 massive boundary pusher here because DD2 travelled under the radar for so long whilst I was sorting out her big brother. Anything she did just seemed mild in comparison so she ended up getting away with a lot more....